AIBU over friend helping another get a job?

[Lizlou85]

AIBU? I am stuck in a deadend job I hate but it pays the bills. I am applying for 3 to 4 jobs a week and so far nothing. My friends know I hate this job and activity looking else where.
Today one of them told me she was made redundant last week and then followed it with but its all ok X, another friend, has got me a job in her company starting tomorrow.

Now I am feeling annoyed that 1 friend has basically put in a word for the other and got a position for her and it is exactly the role I struggling to get into but they never put me forward or suggested the role to me.

We're all meant to be meeting up for drinks this weekend but thinking I might cancel incase its all talk of work and in jokes etc.
AIBU to feel pissed off and annoyed at the pair of them?

How can you 'get' someone a job? Ok you can recommend them but they'd still need to pass the interview.

Why don't you apply there if they're hiring?

Did you ask them? I mean, it may seem obvious to them that friend needed a job as she had just lost hers, but you had a job. one you don't like, yes, but a job nonetheless.

Yes this is exactly what I thought.

So would you have preferred your redundant friend to have remained unemployed and in financial difficulty?

She’s helped out a friend who was potentially in dire need.

That’s really not the same thing as providing you with a job because you don’t like the one you have.

You say you're struggling to get into this sort of job, maybe that's why your friend hasn't put a word in. Perhaps you don't have the experience, qualifications, personality or whatever.

Or maybe it's as simple as she's only sticking her neck out because friend 2 is unemployed and needs a job asap, whereas you're currently in work.

YABU you have a job, even if you hate it. Your friend was made redundant.

Don't let this ruin an otherwise OK friendship. Let it pass.

I’d say YABU

Your friend was made redundant so obviously that already trumps you who has a current job. You’ve been struggling to get into this job you want, perhaps deep down your friend doesn’t think you’re suitable for the job.

Perhaps your friend who was made redundant asked your other friend for a job and she reluctantly done so… there’s so many scenarios here.

I would most likely say there is no malicious intent

Tbh it’s possible she thinks the other friend is a good fit for the organisation or job role but that you aren’t? It doesn’t mean she likes you any less.

Go along, be magnanamous and friendly, congratulate you friend on her new job, then ask the other friend if any more positions are coming up.

The friend had no employment. A dead end job is 100 times better then unemployment. YABU

Do you and your friend even have the same skill set?

We are all in the same industry, use the same systems but just at different companies.
Its stings that even before this friend was made redundant, like even the day before she never mentioned they where recruiting nor tell us both so we had an equal opportunity to apply. It just feels very cloak and dagger.
I have been gracious and congratulated her but also said I hope when we hang out its not all shop talk from them!

Can you think of any reasons why she wouldn't propose you for a role?
Are you reliable, accurate etc. etc.?

I think sometimes it just happens. Ur friend got made redundant and told friend x and friend x may have that day heard they hiring and suggested it to her.

Also if she suggested it to u and u went in and interviewed and got the job and ue friend was jobless would that have made u feel happier ?

U still have a job at the end of the day. Many including your friend don’t. Ur being petty.

If you are applying for 3 or 4 jobs a week and not getting anywhere, I’d be wondering about the quality of your application tbh. Are you tailoring each application to the actual job or just chucking out a load of applications via Indeed?

Perhaps she doesn't want you working within her company. Hear me out. I've got friends I love but wouldn't want to rock up for a job at my workplace, generally because I know they wouldn't be a good fit, not because I don't like them.

Could it be something like that?

I have friends who I also wouldn’t recommend for a job nor would I want to work with them. They may be a great friend but it doesn’t mean they are great at their job and I wouldn’t want that reflecting on me

You can’t get another friend a job just like that. You can recommend them for the position but unless you’re the hiring manager or a director/manager with clout over who’s employed then the person who got the job gets it on their own merits.

Unless you ask the other friend what happened (how she got your other friend the job) and if she’s honest then you’ll never know how she was involved. If she doesn’t want to work with you or you’re no good maybe she doesn’t want to say that to you and is being tactful. Don’t be a dog in the manger over this. You do have a job. The job market for permanent jobs is very tough right now so as pp said maybe you need to work on applications and not just press send on Indeed with your CV if that’s what you’re doing (I’ve done that in the past though).