My friend is kindly hosting a night for me and two others, a girly catch up.

When suggested we agreed on getting a takeaway and consensus from earlier this week was to get an Indian, and we earmarked the specific takeaway we’d order from.

My friend hosting has messaged to say she has picked up a ‘deal‘ from the supermarket this afternoon so she has got some ready meal curries and sides and said we can sort the money out on the night.

First world problem I know, but a supermarket ready meal doesn’t really hit the spot compared to a proper Indian takeaway so I feel a bit annoyed! She didn’t check with us before.

I've managed to snag Bayeux Tapestry tickets for myself and my husband for February. We only visit London maybe once a year and have done most of the tourist hotspots (London Eye, the Tower, etc.). We aren't big drinkers and love history. I'm looking online, and all I'm seeing are escape rooms and similar things. What are some underrated bits to get up to? We're in London for 3 days and will be going to watch a show on the West End on one of the evenings

Or are TikTok people a bit crazy?

When I was learning to do makeup as a teen we were told to buff our foundation. So put some on and brush round and round in circles…..well fingers back in the day. I still do this though now with a nice brush.

I keep seeing influencers just painting their foundation on like you would paint a wall. Bit brush stroke stripes of product until the entire face is covered. The other thing is there seems to be no concept of matching foundation to your actual face colour now. Seems to be pick a shade to make you look like you’ve got a nice golden tan and whack it on. There is no buffing.

My first thought was they must go through a lot of foundation! I mean they look good, do I need to be doing this? 😁

So, I was just driving home alone at ~00:15am

And I saw a guy in a black tracksuit, out in the rain, in a posh road amongst big gated houses. And it looked like he was trying to break into a parked car.

So I was just processing what I was seeing. So I slowed down as I drove past, and then came to a stop down the street (much further, but still in sight I suppose).

It's not a remote spot. And actually it's not a road that tends to have 0 passing traffic.

Anyway, I called the police and told them what I saw. They asked if he was still there. I looked in my mirrors, couldn't see him. Assumed he must have fled. And backed up, still with police on hands free. Said no, I can't see him anymore.

However, then I saw an eye looking at me through the gap between the gate and the wall of this big gated house.

I still had the police on the phone.

I wound my window down and said "can I help you?" And then he appeared over the fence, shouting abuse at me aggressively and proclaiming that that was his house.

I really felt like it was not his house.
But whatever, I drove off and was talking to the police giving a description of him.
But I see him running after me in the rearview mirror.

So I just continued to drive on at a steady pace. But he must have jumped in a car because next thing, I'm being chased / pulled up alongside by this lunatic scally shouting abuse at me through the window.

I didn't react and I didn't want to speed up so in the end he threw a glass bottle at my car and sped off like a mad man.

The whole time I was on the phone to police.

They're out looking for him now.

Was scared to go home for a while but I'm in now.

Just sat here thinking... Wow I was just wanting to get in bed and enjoy catching up on Traitors and somehow ended up in some sort of mad dramatic night.

Did I do the right thing?
Feel like j just got myself in dangers path?
Should I have just ignored what I saw?

It just depresses me to think I wouldn't look out for people in my local area. Hence j felt a duty to call police.

I don't know what scene I just stumbled on but there was definitely something 'off' about it.

YABU - you should have just ignored it and gone about your business

YANBU - you did the right thing calling the police

This is intended as a friendly, kind, safe, warm and fuzzy place for people to share discounts, bargains and Christmas gift ideas both online and IRL. Please note the tone and intention of the thread and join with spirit as generous as DC helping themselves to the Christmas chocolate celebrations .

Here’s some useful information about how to save the thread or a specific post so you don’t need to have a message to check in for every thread so you have the thread saved:

To watch the thread - click on the little bell that has ‘watch’ under my first message. This adds the whole thread to your ‘watched threads’

You can also bookmark a specific post by clicking on the ‘bookmark’ under the specific post. This saves your exact place in a thread but doesn’t alert you to new replies.

If you have any referral links or codes, please share them on the referral thread https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/christmas/5577375-bargain-referrals-thread

A reminder that we don't use affiliated links on here please

If there’s anything you think would be useful or good to include in this post then please do tag me and let me know here (or DM me).

<whispers> I'm starting to think about starting the wrapping soon :)

Previous thread: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/telly_addicts/5589402-welcome-to-the-castle-it-gets-worse-here-every-day-2026-celebrity-traitors-thread-4-tv-pace?reply=155362157

This is a TV pace thread so make sure you’re up to date with the live broadcast and yes, previous series (regular and celeb) will be discussed!

Please no spoilers if you read them online!

The story so far (as at end of episode 6)

Traitors (still active)
Maya Jama
James Acaster (recruited)
King Kenny (recruited)

Faithful

James Blunt
Jerry Hall
Joanne McNally
Leigh-Anne Pinnock
Michael Sheen
Miranda Hart
Romesh Ranganathan
RossKemp (full name)
Sebastian Croft
Sharon Rooney

Murdered
Amol Rajan
Bella Ramsey
Rob Beckett

Banished
Richard E Grant (Traitor)
Myha’la
Julie Hesmondhalgh
Professor Hannah Fry (recruited Traitor)
Joe Lycett

For these that want to keep up with Claudia’s outfits: https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/uk/lifestyle/a73628412/celebrity-traitors-claudia-winkleman-outfits/

Got a family member staying in my house with her DH for a week and the DH doesn't flush the toilet after no 1, doesn't wash hands after going to the toilet and spits in the sink and doesn't rinse. Drives my up the wall. They offered to cook and all I can think is hands haven't been washed after going to the toilet and touching everything in my house. Am I overthinking?

his son dobbed him in? Is it true?
x.com/gbpolitcs/status/2113385754353103129?s=46

If you’re the type of woman says “all I want for Christmas is a hug from my children and a single Ferrero Rocher” then that’s absolutely lovely but not what I’m asking. I need ideas for stuff for myself, lovely things I may not have come across, to put on my Christmas list!!

So far I have a voucher for a Margaret Dabbs medical pedicure
A new casserole dish, Le Creuset style
The secret of cooking by Bee Wilson
A little zip up thing to put in my handbag with my essentials

I’d love some really nice knitwear also.
What sort of lovely things are on your lists?

My kids are 7 (DD) and 4 (DS) years old. I'd like to buy some smaller/cheaper presents for them that they will continue to play with for longer than the Christmas holidays. They love animals, make believe/dress up, crafts and preferably something that would encourage them to play together.

Can anyone recommend something tried and tested for say less than £20?

This might seem callous, but I don’t mean it to be. The thing is, I’m bewildered about how long elderly, bedbound people in their 90s can continue to exist. I’ve got several relatives in this situation. One I know wishes that she had died several years ago: I know because she says so when her children aren’t around. One of the other others, actually it’s hard to tell but she focusses on the next meal, or tea, or sweets, and seems ok. Has a few UTIs and once had a very low breathing rate but was revived. The other, seems to be ok, but at other time seems to be sad and has twice commented that they “just wanted to be all over“.

They’re all in nursing homes, all mid 90s, all bedbound and I just don’t understand how it is that they continue to survive when they are not eating much and not getting any exercise. This has been going on since 2020 for one of them and 2-4 years for the other two.

It seems extraordinary to me and, to be honest, it’s getting family members down. I suppose it’s anticipatory grief, which we’re all warned against.

I’d be interested to know because the way things are going they could all live for another five or six years it seems to me. Gradually declining and getting thinner and paler, but just sort of existing. I don’t want that for myself and I hardly recognise them when I look at them, for the people they used to be. Has anybody else come across this? It’s particularly extraordinary because they’ve lived lives that I would have thought are contrary to all we told about healthy living. Granted, none of them ever drank or smoked, but none took any exercise that I remember. Yet still they are here.

How can the body go on existing?

DD13 is driving me mad. She’s autistic with a PDA profile and high anxiety / low self esteem. We recently found despite < what we considered> strong online / phone restrictions she has managed to bypass them. She had been messaging strangers on Pinterest, some flirty, sending photos that were not inappropriate but still to strangers. Suggestive chat. Using online for looking / discussing self harm imagery etc.

we spoke with school, she’s already under CAMHS due to anxiety and self harm but it’s an ongoing issue and obviously will take time to build trust and rebuild her self esteem. They advised us to let her keep her phone but again restrict access so her camera is blocked, no safari access, no messaging platforms other than IMessage and agreed there would continue to be intermittent phone checks and again reiterated phone / online safety.

we have just found she’s somehow continued to bypass this to access and message on Pinterest strangers. Males who for all I know are adults. I’m furious. I understand her drive for friendship and connection but equally she isn’t acting appropriately and considering safety mentioning where we live etc. I want to remove her phone completely and replace it with a literal dumb phone that can text and call only so she can communicate with real life friends but can’t bypass security for internet.

Friends think I’m being too harsh, it’s an age / teen thing and removing it will drive her further from us. Which I see… but equally she continues to ignore boundaries.

Wise ones please help

It’s that time of the year again 😁

I’ve been looking for the nail colour Claudia is wearing in the current celebrity traitors… it’s a red/orange/brown but still vibrant.

Can someone help?

Apologies for my tardiness! , the last thread finished unexpectedly!!! 😱

Skirt https://www.marksandspencer.com/faux-leather-midi-wrap-skirt/p/clp61268242?color=Black&intid=mobileapppdpshare
Fit is amazing
feel amazing
looks really expensive.

But if I wore it with black tights, would it look weird ? if I wore it with knee boots would it break up the whole split thing so I think I have to work with heels and then what on my legs?

I’m going to Rome next month.

My flight is at 15:40 so I need to be at the airport by 12:40.

I live a five hour coach journey from the airport, or about three hours by train and then bus. But of course if travelling by public transport you have to factor in time for delays etc.

I’m really tempted to go up the day before and stay either in the city centre or at the airport. But that also feels a bit silly for a 3pm flight!

What’s the general consensus on this sort of thing?

Basically my MIL is retired and full of energy. Very restless, but not much to keep her occupied (she doesn't believe in volunteering). She wants to have a relationship with her grandkids (my kids), and she likes to feel "useful". Which is all well and good.

So she will happily look after the kids for 2/3 weeks a year. Either we go to her or she comes to us.

The problem is that I don't feel like I have a CHOICE in the matter. Whether I want to or not, the kids will be looked after by Nana for 2 - 3 weeks a year. And I need to be thankful for it, because she is "doing it to give me time to work as a busy mum". (She goes on and on about my "busy-ness" even if it's is not something I particularly feel). It's so that she feels "useful" in taking the kids. If I say I'm not actually that busy, then I have to explain exactly why I'm not busy when I should be.

Why is her taking the kids not particularly useful to me? Because my job is pretty flexible - I work part time, and I buy unpaid leave and can easily take parental leave (I am not a big spender, and between my salary and my husband's we thankfully are quite comfortable). I work entirely from home. There are lots of clubs I can sign them up for that they are happy to go to, and I can (thankfully) afford. I've sorted my life out. So her help is NICE but not actually that USEFUL to me.

But she tells her family (and mine) in front of me, about how she helps ME (not her son) to take care of the kids. At which point I'm supposed to look grateful. She also clearly wants me to be thankful to her. My husband also asks me "when it would be helpful for ME for his mum to come and take care of the kids."

I find it difficult to be close to her as she is judgemental about my life choices. She was a determined career woman in her time, while I've chosen (and am luckily able) to make big career sacrifices to be hands-on with my kids (which I'm very happy with, but don't need to constantly defend). And her opinions "leak out" in lots of little ways.

I do say a courteous "thank you" at the end of a visit, but I am not as warm as I would like to be. I generally try to be pleasant but make myself scarce during her visits. I don't look forward to them.

Am I being unreasonable? I would LIKE to be thankful for her help, especially e.g. from another post where lady was jealous of people who have grandparent help. And to say it is of zero use to me would be a lie. Yes it IS nice for me not to have to sort kids meals, bed time, showers etc when they are with her. And, some kid free days where I where I can relax in the evening, or work abit longer if I feel like it are nice. (I don't need 3 weeks, but a day or 2 here and there IS nice).

It's just the "Nana is flying in to help mummy take care of the kids so that mummy can work" that really grates. "Nana is coming to visit" I am ok with. "Nana is coming to help mummy" annoys the s**t out of me.

I have a friend who IS a career woman, and she is sooo grateful that her in laws take her kids off her hands so she can work uninterrupted. So I feel ungrateful. I guess I'm just the wrong DIL for my MIL?

YABU: Yes, you should be thankful and are being petty
YANBU: Your feelings are totally legitimate.

Credit to @thebrowncatisback for the title. Original thread is here: www.mumsnet.com/talk/in_the_news/5589048-russell-brand?callback=in&code=YTEWYJJJMZQTMJFHNS0ZNDI5LTK3N2QTZWJHYWNHZJGXNZA2&page=39&state=aa7521b41da5458084d85ced7c73c27d

Last night I get home, it was around 7.30 and my youngest said mummy I'm hungry. I was confused DH had been home since 2pm and sorted HIS stuff and then he headed off to his hobby. I checked to see if they had enough dinner, then the child says we didn't get any dinner! I'm furious...

There has been a few changes and I have been very understanding that DH is trying to adjust. However, for f"*k sake... I feel like I need to still manage everything and ensure things get done. I'm asked a 100 questions daily. An I snapped last night...

I just don't get how you can go off to a hobby knowing that your children still haven't eaten however, you've made sure all the stuff he had to do was priority and very much completed.

My DD has always been very good at Maths. In Year 6, she achieved Greater Depth in her Maths SATS (achieving 115/120). Since joining Year 7, she has been in a mixed ability Maths Set. In the work that has been sent home from Secondary and that is set on Sparx, she is getting 80% - 90% correct, independently.

We have just had a letter home today, advising that Maths will be set after half term, and my DD will be in Set 5 of 6! The letter also explains that she has been assessed as finding Maths challenging and not to worry about sets, every child will be assisted individually. AIBU to think the school doesn’t know my DD at all, and to send an email querying how they came to this decision? I fail to see how she can now be finding maths challenging and in Set 5 of 6, having achieved 115/120 in her SATS only months ago. Maths has always been a subject she has excelled in, right down to her KS1 Times Tables test where she scored 100%. BTW this is not a selective school or grammar, it’s mainstream state, so it’s not as though the department will be awash with Maths geniuses (in the least offensive way). I also don’t want to appear as a trouble maker or someone the school will be fed up with, but I think this needs to be questioned to find out what has gone wrong so to speak.

My husband thinks I shouldn’t say anything as the school will just think I’m a neurotic mum, I disagree and I think it needs to be dealt with and questions asked pronto - something has clearly gone drastically wrong either with the teachers assessment of DD or in the way DD is presenting herself in class?!

Hello !

I have a big age gap between my children, one is 17(m) the other 4(f).

I'd really love ideas for something they might both enjoy for Christmas festivities so we could all enjoy it as a family (as opposed to the older one tolerating to indulge us all!)

Please could I ask for ideas on:

1. A game (as in board game type thing). So far I've found dobble - enjoyed by both. Uno - enjoyed by the older, still slightly confusing to the younger.

1. Ideas for a Christmas film. Last year Paddington was a hit. But now I am stumped !

The only interests they both have in common are music (verrrrry different taste) and animals.

Any suggestions much appreciated!

Property originally listed last year (2025) for £520k. Reduced to £475k, didn't sell. On market for 6 months.

Reslisted this year for £450k. One offer in first week, no other offers apart from mine (accepted £435k in 4th month).

I've had a building survey done and needs a new roof (costs £20k approx).

Seller initially did not budge on price, so I withdrew 4 weeks ago, & she relisted. Yesterday, she came back and offered "£3-4k reduction"

I'm thinking minimum 50% of cost. Is this reasonable and how would you negotiate this?

DS left home four months ago. He left almost all of his belongings here - all his furniture (including his bed, sofa, two wardrobes, huge TV etc all of which he bought himself), his exercise equipment, sports gear, most of his clothes... All he took was a couple of cases/boxes as he moved into a furnished studio and didn't have room for anything else.

We live in a 2 bed house currently. DS's room is the larger bedroom with a little annexe bit he used as his mini gym. He has a LOT of stuff in there.

DH and I have been offered the opportunity to downsize to a lovely 1 bed flat which would reduce our rent by almost £200pm. However DS has asked us not to move as he would have nowhere to keep his things and it would be 'weird' not being able to come home to his childhood home. He says he has no room for all his belongings so would have to store them which would cost him at least £150pm. Also he stays here roughly once a week after a night out - he moved semi-rurally to be near his work and we are in the centre of town, so it's handy for him after nights out when he can't get back to his. He says that he would have to pay for hotels if we moved (the place we are looking at is a good way out of town). He currently has no plans to move to a bigger place so keeping his stuff here, and him staying over, is an indefinite arrangement. He has a key and comes and goes as he pleases.

WIBU to ask him for something towards storing his stuff to offset the cost of the extra rent we currently pay? To be absolutely clear, the new flat we are looking at is absolutely beautiful and is specifically for over 55s, DH and I are both in our 60s and I am disabled so it would be a real help, not least because of the lack of stairs which I find more difficult as time goes on. It's not that we don't want to move and we're using DS as a means to pay towards our rent, we really do want to go. We also have friends close by the new place and it's closer to DH's work.

We wouldn't ask much - maybe £50 or £75 a month - just to offset what we pay a bit. Before DS left he was paying us about £200 a month towards food and his share of the bills, for reference. He is 36 and earns a decent enough wage so could afford it, and it would be less than he would have to spend on storage/hotels. We are actually a little bit better off each month since he left (he was a big eater and a fan of central heating!) so again to be clear we are not trying to make money from him by attempting to claw back some of his board money that we no longer have. I'd say we're about £50pm better off since he left.

I am torn because I feel bad asking him for money but we would love to move, and having him to all intents and purposes still living here part time - which we love, don't get me wrong, he is always very welcome - is stopping us doing that. And also costing us money which we don't have really, in the extra rent we're currently paying but could save if we moved.

YABU - I shouldn't ask my son for money for keeping his room as his own

YANBU - It's fair he should contribute as he sort-of still lives here, and if he wasn't we could downsize to somewhere more suitable and pay less ourselves

Fully expect that IABU because I feel as if I am but needs must!

A couple of weeks ago, my son kicked his football over the fence to our neighbours; this happens a lot. We have 3 neighbours across our back garden; two of them are lovely and never complain. The 3rd has never complained and kicks it back, but isn't super friendly, though not unfriendly. So the ball goes over to neighbour number 3; I wait a few days, assuming they will chuck it back. A week passes, and I am looking out the window across neighbour number 3's garden when I see our ball has been chucked over the other side of neighbour number 3's fence, to neighbour number 4. We have never spoken to these neighbours, but from quite a few garden parties, we know they are very friendly with neighbour number 3. They have a young son, and I can see our ball in his trampoline. I asked my husband to knock on the door and ask if our ball had made its way into their garden. My husband is refusing because he's not a big fan of these neighbours and reckons they know they have our ball and have decided to keep it. I think their kid probably just picked it up, played with it, and probably hasn't noticed. These neighbours are slightly douchy... think personalised number plates, loud parties etc, but they don't seem like horrible people, as far as I can tell. Am I being unreasonable to think my husband is pathetic for not going over there and asking for the ball? I will probably do it myself, but it would be nice not to do everything.

I’m struggling with what to get her for Christmas, she likes making/doing/crafting. Does anyone have any suggestions?
She has so many lovely toys, Barbie’s, babies, sylvanian families and Playmobil she just doesn’t seem to play anymore or if she does it’s usually for a short period of
time and loses interest quite quickly. She used to play for hours on end with small
world toys. 5 seems so young to stop playing with toys.