This eBay seller is having a laugh, surely?

I’m at checkout and £4.50 short of free delivery so as the delivery cost is similar, I might as well buy something. For those idling away time, suggestions. Any bargains to be had?

We are dealing with elderly people in their 80s - is decline inevitable or do you think there are things we can do to live a healthy very older age? Mobility and strength seems key but can it be maintained into 80s and 90s?

Hi, I need help please! A school mum keeps asking me to take her little girl to school and pick her up and it’s constant! She even wants to drop her daughter to my house at 7:30am. The thing is this child is so loud and so rude to not only me but my daughter to, it really upsets my child and she cries when she knows we have to drop her off and pick her up from school. How do I tell the mum I no longer want to drop her off and pick her up? Do I send a message in advance or wait till she asks me? Just to add also the mum is rude herself and not sure how she will respond. The other problem is I sometimes help another mum but only for pick ups but her child is so lovely and gets along with my daughter so well.

Suddenly needed to use the toilet (ibs) in M&S, a lady walked in and kept saying. "Oh god it stinks in here!" Over and over again to everyone in the queue.
aibu or is that a bit mean!? It's a toilet after all. I ended up having to stay in the cubicle for ages because then i was too embarrassed to walk out after she'd been telling everyone over and over again that it stinks.
i did flush multiple times to try and avoid too much smell but I'm not sure what else I could have done.

My mum is 70 in December. I have 2 younger half sisters who are my mums daughters, not with my father. We get on ok but aren’t that close.

A few weeks ago we were all talking about ideas for mums birthday gifts and they asked what I was getting. I said I’d already bought an item of jewellery which they asked to see so I showed it to them online. It’s quite expensive and something my mum always says she likes but would never treat herself to. They said it’s expensive and I said she’s only 70 once and that my kids would be contributing a little towards it. They showed me some things they were thinking of getting mum which I agreed she would really like.

Today, one of my half sisters have asked my son how much he is contributing to the gift. He told them he wasn’t sure exactly but around £200. He said they asked in a casual way so thought nothing of answering. My half sisters have now said they would also like to give me £200 each so that the gift can be from them as well. I’ve said no, I’d rather get it from just me, my husband and our children and they should get something else like they planned. It’s quite expensive and something my mum first seen when she was with me and although I’m happy for my children to contribute a small amount of the total due to them being my children, I’m not happy for my half sisters to only contribute a small amount to an expensive gift and then say it’s from us all. They think I’m being unfair.

My mum is the type of person who will love anything any of us buy her. I’ve bought her things for a few pounds in the past that she treasures so she would not let this gift overshadow anything at all that her other children get her.

What do you think? AIBU?

I’ve changed my username because some posts I’ve made previously are possibly identifying.

I have discovered messages between my DP and a work colleague. On the 2nd night of 4 nights away in the UK.

I thought he was acting strange yesterday and being odd with his phone. I looked at it when he fell asleep last night (we are in a lodge and he left it on charge in another room) and took photos of as many messages as possible.

I confronted him today and at my request he left where we are staying by himself. He has tried to call me loads and sent me multiple long messages apologising and saying it meant nothing and was stupid work banter which would never go anywhere.

I just don’t know how I can see past the messages. It’s really rude stuff. The colleague is clearly abroad currently and sent him a photo of her at a pool wearing high wedges and swimwear pulled up her arse. DP said he wishes he was there and she asked what would he do if he was. He just casually replies ‘I’d have to eat that arse first’. She says she’s on the cocktails so would let him do anything.

I scrolled back further and they are talking about a work night out which DP couldn’t make but she was on. She was saying she was bored and her and another colleague were rating their top 5 colleagues. DP said he best be first. She said yeah and which of the two would he want to go with first. He replied saying ‘simple problem to solve, her (other colleague) on my face and you riding me’.

They are probably the worst examples. I don’t class that as banter though?!!! It’s full on flirting. There is nothing in there to suggest anything physical.

This has literally just happened and I've excused myself to the bedroom in complete shock.

I have birth 2 weeks ago to our son. My partner overall has been a really hands-on good dad and always steps in to help when I'm struggling the baby. This is good but I also find at times that he criticises me. This is both of our first child.

This week we have 3 of his family members visiting from abroad. They are staying with us for 10 nights, they arrived late last night (and I had a lovely meal spread put out for them) . I spent this morning upstairs with baby as he's been cluster-feeding and I'm breastfeeding and don't want to whip my boobs out in front of them.

At 4pm after me and baby had had a good sleep, I got ready (left baby in his bassinet in the bedroom) and then got the baby ready and was about to bring him downstairs when he had a blowout and covered himself, me and his bedroom bassinet in poo and sick. I got overwhelmed and called my partner and asked him to come upstairs and help as by this point our baby was hungry and crying. Partner took the baby downstairs to give him a bottle of expressed breast milk and I clean up the mess upstairs and showered and got changed again.

I come down and say hi the family and I was about to go and get myself a drink (they were having a BBQ in garden) and partner is feeding the baby with them stood around cooing. My partner calls my name and beckons me over so I go into the garden. He says "What are these huge red marks on the baby's face? These weren't there when I left the baby with you." His family members all stayed silent. I was in shock that he'd just asked that so I stuttered a bit and said "It is his nails, we need to cut them." It is his nails, they are very long. I tried to cut them last week but I was too terrified to cut his finger and had a close call so I stopped and haven't attempted since. I've been reminding my partner that we need to do them and that I'd like him to help as he has a steadier hand but we haven't got around to it yet. My partner then reiterated "These weren't there before I left the baby with you this morning." Everyone stayed quiet so I just sort of slinkered off to wash my pump as I have to pump every time the baby has a bottle.

As I was stood at the sink he shouts from the garden "Don't you think the baby was too hot upstairs? His face is covered in sweat." and I spoke back and said "He is fine, he is wet from the crying." and my partner said under his breath "Yeah of course". Keep in mind this is in front of all of his family members.

By this point I felt completely and utterly ashamed and humiliated so I went upstairs to pump. He's just come up again and I thought it was to apologise but then he said "Did you put the baby's teddy bear coat on when you went on our yesterday? I saw it out on the dining table. Isn't it too big for him?" and I just told him "No it's fine." and he left.

I can't stop crying, I'm really trying my best with this baby and he's just making me feel like a shit mother in front of everyone. The family are here for another 9 nights. I had been really looking forward to them coming over and showing them my baby and now I just want to run away.

I started a new job recently and have signed up for the Christmas lunch/evening entertainment.

I am hoping to have lost some weight by then, but I've been saying I will for the past 2 years so I'm not confident that'll happen.

I.m in my 40s, size 14 and top heavy with quite slim legs and zero bum. Biggest issue is my stomach and I would like to hide it as much as possible.

My chest is on the bigger side (38E) but my stomach is pretty much as far out as my chest, and I'd like something that could potentially give me a shape so I don't look like one big blob with stick legs!

It's more of a casual dress code so no sparkly dresses etc. Some people will wear Christmas jumpers, but I'd like to wear something slightly more dressy than that, but not be too over dressed - and distract from my stomach.

I know it's a while yet but It'll be the first time I'll meet people from different departments and I'd really like to make an effort.

I'm terrible with fashion so any help would be gratefully received!

I’m perplexed and perhaps you could shine a light on my situation
My closest friend of forty years seems almost cold and completely disinterested about my new relationship.
Im divorced and have a really hard marriage and life generally. My children have AD and out of the blue I met a man some months ago. We’re both mid fifties .
We are together 8/9 months and in a medium distance relationship and are so so happy right now. He has been consistent, kind, loving and everything in between. My children, family, other friends and colleagues are thrilled for me as they know how unlucky I’ve been in love . They really like him also.
My friend however shows no interest when his name is brought up in conversation. She doesn’t ask me how it’s going or anything really. I’m so surprised !
She has met him once and was civil and pleasant but again when he did something really kind and thoughtful for me at a low time , which she observed, she didn’t even comment! This is not the friend I’ve known for forty years.
Her own life is difficult. She has different issues and her marriage seems at this stage to be a convenience but she has spoken about feeling trapped and discontented with little hope for the future happiness.
As a rule, she enjoys company of friends and loves a good night out as an escape but I don’t understand her . I know if I asked her she would. Shut it down.
She doesn’t know him or anything about him from his past which is clean so Im
out of ideas.
What are your thoughts here please?

My beautiful dog is going to be put down tomorrow. Shes in pain and the cool air and grown outside seems to offer some relief. She doesnt like to be alone. So I'm thinking about just sleeping in the garden to join her. But im aware that for one I'm grieving and thats clouding my judgement and for two I don't have the most clear judgement anyway.

I should add I'm a scout leader so I'm not afraid of the elements. Its dry and pretty temperate here tonight and I have a lovely double sleeping bag to cosy up in.

Aibdriven mad from grief or should I go for it?

Just wanted to give anyone who is interested a heads up about a place to avoid for a Christmas Day out. Last year we went to the Four Kingdoms and I honestly could have wept. It was awful. Think Nessa’s (Gavin and Stacey) Christmas grotto and you’re not far off. The place is filthy. I spent a considerable amount of time filling out profiles for each of us, with information to be used for said visit. Hardly any of it was used. IT COST A FORTUNE. I’m talking over £400 for 3 kids and 2 adults. I thought maybe a post about places to avoid would be helpful. This year we are doing the polar express at Churnet, if that’s crap I’m quitting Christmas for good. 🎅🏽

A neighbour has asked me to drive her to, stay with her and bring her home from 2 upcoming hospital appointments. The first is in 4 weeks time and the second the week after. I have said I can’t because I’m working and she has asked if I can book the time off. I haven’t replied but this seems cheeky to me after I’d said no. AIBU? I need my annual leave for things with my own family. She has people who visit her who I presume are family and friends but apparently has no one to go with her. I work full time at home and have children so with everything that comes with that I’m busy.

I’ve name changed as I’m guessing this won’t have happened to too many other people this week.

We have been away on holiday and my mum asked if she could stay at our house for a few days when we were away. We live in the countryside and my mum lives in a city so she enjoys being here for a change of pace. I asked what she planned to do and she said not much, just relax, read, go on walks and just have time to herself. I said she was welcome to stay, made up a spare room for her, made her some meals for the freezer and got other food in for her.

We have got back earlier today and our house is not how my mum would normally leave it, just little things like cushions on the sofas were left untidy, the bin and dishwasher were not emptied. We don’t mind, it’s little things, but my husband said that it’s not like my mum and asked if I thought she was ok. I sent my mum a text to say we were home but I didn’t hear back which is unlike her.

We have cameras that record outside and in the hallway so I checked them to see when she left thinking maybe she had stayed longer and was still travelling home. The cameras showed my mum arriving with my step sister, her partner and 1 other person who we don’t know. I can see them all coming and going over 5 days. My mum leaves about 3 hours before the rest of them on the last day they’re here.

I do not get on with my step sister and haven’t spoken to her for years after a big fall out. My mum knows she will never be welcome in our home. I feel so angry and betrayed that my mum has lied to me and let them use our home.

Since checking the cameras, I’ve had a good look in each room. They’ve obviously used other rooms to sleep in and some of our toiletries have been used. I presume they’ve all had a good look around.

My mum still hasn’t answered my text, I’ve also called her and she isn’t answering. We are really angry that my mum has let other people stay here when we only agreed she could. Obviously I will speak to mum but how would you feel and react to this? My husband says we will need to change the locks and we’ll never trust them again, which at the moment I agree with. It’s my mum and I’m trying to think of good reasons she would have allowed this and think it’s okay but she knows I hate my SS so there really isn’t any good reason.

This is intended as a friendly, kind, safe, warm and fuzzy place for people to share discounts, bargains and Christmas gift ideas both online and IRL. Please note the tone and intention of the thread and join with spirit as generous as DC helping themselves to the Christmas chocolate celebrations .

Here’s some useful information about how to save the thread or a specific post so you don’t need to have a message to check in for every thread so you have the thread saved:

To watch the thread - click on the little bell that has ‘watch’ under my first message. This adds the whole thread to your ‘watched threads’

You can also bookmark a specific post by clicking on the ‘bookmark’ under the specific post. This saves your exact place in a thread but doesn’t alert you to new replies.

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Have you ever had any celebrity encounters or near misses? There's a radio DJ who I snogged years ago and shouldn't have. He was far too principled to take it further and I really admired that, funnily enough though I was upset. He's still on the radio now and I think about it a fair bit if I hear him.

I certainly didn’t and I miss it! The only part of my body to become skinny and Im absolutely pissed off. Why did no one tell me about this?? And now I feel I can’t tell anyone else in case it’s just me.

Please help me! My son is getting married in 8 weeks and I haven’t a clue what to wear. So far I’ve ordered three dresses online (Coast, Lavish Alice and Florere) and have sent them all back. Earlier this week I had a personal stylist appointment at John Lewis, bought 3 items (Hobbs dress, Reiss dress and Phase Eight jumpsuit), but not sure any of them are right. Also ordered a jumpsuit from Me+Em, not yet received. I don’t know if that will be right either, I know it will need shortening about 6 inches!
I’m 5’3, 9st 6, have lost 7 stone over last 3 years. Blue eyes, brown hair/blond highlights. i think the colours that suit me best are greens/golds/sandy but not at all rigid except that pastel colours make me look washed out.
There’s a register office wedding service and then the bigger wedding ‘do’ 3 days later, so I need two outfits! Budget about £400ish for both. I just feel so much of what I’m seeing is so ‘bland’ and ordinary, I want to feel a bit more cool and funky but still smart of course.
Would really appreciate some help or suggestions of makers/brands I’m not aware of… thanks in advance.

DH has been away for work on and off for the last few weeks, really long hours + jet lag.

He came home for one night on Tuesday night (we live near a major airport) which was essentially a layover almost at our house before driving the next morning 5 hours, again for work where he is the for the next 10 days.

He was obviously incredibly tired and was being unreasonable and out of character yesterday morning before he left which resulted in an argument. He then left without saying goodbye and I haven’t heard from him since, he’s never ignored me before but he went the entire day ignoring any calls or messages. I left it from mid afternoon but now still haven’t heard from him, the only reason I know he’s got there safely is because I have him on find friends.

I can also see he is still at the hotel … it’s 1pm and he should be working today as far as I know. I’m now getting really worried. Is there anything I can do apart from wait? Am I being overly anxious?

I’m not really a dress person and want something interesting for an evening event. It’s technically black tie, but the vibe is more party‑style, so there aren’t any strict rules about what to wear.

I don’t have a fixed budget, though I’d prefer not to go over £500.

Right now I’m leaning toward an interesting top with trousers, mostly because I can’t think of many other options. A jumpsuit could work too.

I tend to avoid high‑street shops, as I’m looking for something a bit more unique.

For tops, I could go either floaty or tailored. Since I’m a short size 12, if I choose something floaty on top, I’d pair it with more tailored trousers.

Ideally, I’m looking for something long‑sleeved with a V‑neck. Colour wise, I'd like something in a jewel tone and definitely not black. Happy to also wear an interesting top with trousers I already own too.

Any suggestions?

Was chatting to colleagues over lunch today and one of them was complaining about how little time she and her husband get together due to having children. I know her kids are old enough to be doing GCSEs and A Levels so I asked why she and her husband couldn’t go away for a night or two without them, and she looked at me like I’d grown another head! We live in a small town with a low crime rate and she acknowledged that her quiet, studious daughters were extremely unlikely to set fire to the house or throw a party…

I explained to my colleague that by the age of 14 I was babysitting younger children overnight, from 15 my parents would go away for a week without us (and we’d be expected to cook our dinners, keep the house tidy, get ourselves to school etc.) and at 16 I was holidaying abroad with friends! She was appalled. I pointed out that her eldest would be going off to university and living independently in less than 2 years, all she could say was “well she’ll be 18 then” as if turning 18 would flip a switch and magically make her daughter capable of functioning as an adult.

I’d always planned on parenting in a similar way to how I was brought up - building maturity/confidence by gradually giving my kids more freedom and responsibility - but now I wonder if this approach would get social services called on me! I’m in my early 30s by the way so it’s not like my experience is from yonks ago, it would have been around 2010.

Would you find it completely unreasonable to leave a 14-15 year old and 16-17 year old at home alone overnight? (And if yes, when and how would you bridge the gap between childhood and adulthood?)

Female mid 50s. No hobbies, tons of money so buys what she likes. Lives a sedentary life so watches tv, eats out, goes to pub. No interest in house or garden. Likes wine and food but doesn’t cook, gets hair, nails and make up done professionally regularly. Doesn’t want any toiletries/beauty things as has so much. Doesn’t read or go out for walks. doesn’t do real life shopping but buys tons of tat online. My budget is only £30 so not in the range of buying a weekend away or anything which would go down well. Can’t buy clothes as wouldn’t want to guess her size (sensitive issue) and only wears real Ugg slippers. I have exhausted every idea I have had and ones from here in the past so any ideas would be very much appreciated!! I can’t not get her anything as it would cause so much drama and upset in an otherwise very happy family. Got her a heated blanket last year for her life on the sofa but she wasn’t impressed. Am stumped! She is a good person but lives a very different life from me! Heeeeeeeelllllllllppp please!

Local authority pool, exclusively used for kids swimming lessons between 4 and 7. All lessons are 30 minutes, all starting and ending at the same time. 5 lessons with about 10 kids FS in each, so 50 kids. No idea how many cubicles, I'd estimate 50 but haven't counted.

Family changing rooms, so all cubicles. There are lockers and parents viewing area with chairs.

The pool periodically sends out emails telling people not to "reserve" changing room cubicles by leaving their clothes in for the duration of the lesson. Idea is the child changes and the adult takes their stuff to the viewing area. And yet, every week, almost all changing rooms have clothes, towels, bags and school book bags in them for the duration of the lesson. This means if you have to get your child changed before the lesson (like we do), there are no free spaces.

This week I went in a cubicle with stuff in it, because there were no free ones. Waiting would mean my child missed part of her lesson.

The parent shouted at me - actually shouted. "That's my changing room and you've taken it" and banging on the door. Her child was still in the water. I continued to get my child dressed, and came out - before the lesson got the children out the water. I explained she wasn't supposed to "reserve" cubicles like that. She said "it had my stuff in it".

So was I being unreasonable?

This is a weekly occurrence. They don't man the changing area so no employee to speak with, just reception and then the swim teachers who obviously can't come and police the changing rooms.

I have complained to the pool before now and an email goes out, but nothing changes.

DH and I have been together 20yrs+ with DC. Joint finances. He has received an inheritance that he wants to use to take early retirement. I don’t want to retire yet so will continue to work through choice. I would rather save the money for kids uni fees / help with house deposit and he continues to work. He thinks I ABU. What do you think? There isn’t really enough to do both so no compromise that I can see. His argument is that we have (small) savings already for the kids.

Hi all, looking for recommendations for a good bristle brush for long, thick fine hair. My teenage niece has mid back length hair but she’s struggling to brush it with her Manta brush. Can anyone help please? It’s her birthday coming up so I’m willing to treat her to a good one!