I know I sound horrible. I know I’ll get lots of hate saying leave him the poor man but I know a lot of women feel the same.
I love him but he just gets on my nerves anyone feel the same? Give me stories / things your husbands do that grate on you like a fork on a brick wall. 😂 I know I sound vile. I’m honestly not, just ughhhhh shudder.

Was Paul Newman, discuss

I have 2 dc with my ex (8 and 10) he usually has them 3 days a week and every half term, 2 weeks of the summer holidays and we alternate Xmas. Works well.

His wife has recently got a new job and initially it involves a lot of travel apparently. She won’t travel alone.
He has now informed me that there are 3 weekends he can’t do between now and Xmas plus he can’t have the dc during October half term and there are a couple of other days too that he can’t do, no option to move days as he has to work and is self employed so when he’s travelling with her he’s just not working.

AIBU to think this is strange ? Why can’t she travel alone , apparently she doesn’t feel safe and he wants to support her but she isn’t going to any dangerous countries !!!

https://www.dunelm.com/product/emily-metal-bed-frame-1000295082?defaultSkuId=31055771&size=Small+Double+4ft&colour=Cream

Am I being unreasonable to think that the gap between the bars could present a risk to a tween/young teenager, if their head were to become stuck between them? (I haven't measured the width of the gap). Or am I unreasonably stuck in some sort of baby / toddler safe sleeping mode? Tell me if IABU. Teen likes this style.

Clothes accessories cosmetics everything.

My DH and I have always left mobiles etc in bag on/under lounger when we go in the pool or sea but I'm travelling for a week with my mum and she thinks this sounds dodgy and that we won't both be able to go in the water together. It's made me wonder if we've been to trusting in the past but I can't see what else you would do? One of those clear pouches round your neck for your phone? I've never seen anyone using one so can I ask what you all do?

I have always got on with my neighbour who lives a few a doors down.

I have babysat one of her kids and also looked after her cat when she goes on holiday.

She does have a mean girl vibe about her though and she does have a habit of talking about others.

I asked her to do look after my cats and do my bins whilst I was away with DC and she happily agreed.

Whilst I was loading the car I overheard and another neighbour complaining about me calling on my cats every night.

Convo was like

Neighbour 1 "Did you hear her yelling for her cats again?"

Neighbour who is looking after my cats "I heard it but went back to bed".

Neigbour 2 "I can't believe how her neighbours haven't said anything, it's every effing night, literally by their next door neighbours windows every night, literally, I am absolutely sick of it, wakes me up every effing night".

Neighbour who is looking after my cats "Yeah I know as it's as the back it is really loud."

I popped my head up from the passenger seat and they stopped talking.

For reference Neigbour 2 would regularly
play her music at for hours on end so it was ironic hearing her complain about me. I also helped her with her gardening.

I feel this is very 2 faced and want to step back and wondering why they didn't approach me directly instead of talking about me.?

AIBU to not talk to them when I get back of holiday?

I do suffer from anxiety so not sure if I am over reacting here.
AIBU

Call me old fashioned, but isn't this sort of thing likely to provoke a run on toilet rolls? Couldnt find any other threads on it, but I think there is a "preppers" topic on here somewhere. In any case, what do you think? I'm sort of concerned, should I be? Or has this gone under the radar?

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2026/aug/25/uk-to-warn-citizens-to-stock-up-on-food-amid-threat-from-climate-crisis-and-hostile-states

I've decided to treat myself, but I don't know where to start.

Firstly I don't know what else to call the kind of bag I'm after, hence "status" bag. I like Chanel, LV, which I know some fashionistas like to sneer at, so please, if that's you, respect that we all have different preferences.

I'm looking for a lovely every day bag, that I don't look stupid with on the school run etc. We live rurally, and didn't before, so all my Chanel and LV with chain straps etc would look majorly over done and I'd feel ridiculous wandering round town on casual shop with one. I do sometimes take my neverful but I'd like something much smaller. Slouchy and comfy as opposed to stiff leather.

What's a casual but still "status" bag that I could go for? I don't like massive gold logos etc like the GG Gucci bags, or the ones with big YSLs down the front. I would like it to be recognisable as branded, but from close up, not from across the street if you see what I mean.

Thank you.

DH has bought something for the house without mentioning it to me and I am honestly a bit annoyed.

It was about £40 so its not like he's gone mad or anything but its something we absolutely did not need and I would have rather the money went towards other things tbh.

I only found out because the parcel turned up and when I asked what it was he said he'd ordered it a couple of days ago. I said I wish he'd mentioned it first and he said why, its hardly a big purchase and he doesn't ask me before buying things for himself.

I do see that point but I don't really think its the same when its something for the house? Especially when we've got other things coming up that we need to pay for.

I am not saying he needs to ask permission every time he spends money btw. If he wants to buy himself something with his own money then obviously thats different. But if its coming out of our joint account for something that is basically unnecessary then surely its reasonable to discuss it first?

He thinks I'm being controlling and making an issue out of nothing.

AIBU?

Ds’s girlfriend is about to train as an English teacher. Maybe a book voucher?? Or something hefty on caffeine and sugar 😬

I appreciate it’s going to be different for everyone, but I have no idea of the approx cost of the treatment, and how long it might take.

I’m thinking of sorting out my teeth, but have no idea if it is achievable financially for me.

would anyone care to share how much your treatment cost and how long it took?

thanks very much

Looking for advice, aware there was a post made for April Fools 2 years ago! However this one is genuine.
I have lived in a ground floor flat for 5 years, which has an enclosed walled patio garden. I love the garden and it’s a little haven in the middle of the city. I have enjoyed planting and growing varieties of cut flowers.
I have neighbour next door who has a very similar set up to me, enclosed walled garden and she too enjoys her garden in the same way I do.
Neighbour took on a stray cat approximately a year ago, the cat roams locally to where we live (particularly the abandoned building next door). I too have a cat, he was also a stray, he does not roam and is very much a homebody. He is territorial over the garden and will chase away any other cats who may consider coming in.
My neighbour has become slightly overbearing, in what I should and shouldn’t be putting in my garden. This includes slug killer (pet safe version), coffee grounds, and weed killer. I have always kept her informed when I have used it which gives her the choice of keeping her cat inside if she wishes. Previously she has stopped maintenance workers from weeding areas in the car park as they were using weed killer, went as far as to write a note on the weed killer solution when they went on break naming it ‘cat killer’.
My issue now, I mentioned I went looking for tulip bulbs over text, and she replied with a screenshot of information of tulip toxicity and the complications they can cause to cats if ingested, particularly the bulbs.
My cat has zero interest in my plants (he much prefers sunbathing). I have grown daffodils and tulips for years with cats and had zero issues. I know that this is simply to safeguard her cat however I’m feeling that this is beyond controlling and passive aggressive and her cat is not my responsibility. Her cat also free roams around the area so it doesn’t make any sense for her to be overly concerned about what’s in my garden.
Any advice on how to deal with this?

I'd say i'm a girls girl, if you call it that?
Enjoyed the company of men as friends more when younger, but had mainly female pals.
Just been for a dog walk around the neighbourhood with my family and ran into a couple around the corner. Any time we do, this woman just lights up around Dh and chats away (have seen her do this with other male neighbours too)
I've tried hard to be friendly and smiley but she's just not as friendly as with Dh and other men, laughing at his comments (he's not even that funny really 🤣) and chattering away, turning her back on me.
I don't know, maybe she just doesn't like me, which is fine, but she seems to love talking to the men, not women. I realise that sounds bitchy, I don't mean it to be, I just find it a bit annoying especially when we walk off and Dh says 'She's so nice!'
I have a feeling she maybe isn't!

Anyone had this or know what I mean?

Fitted, not itchy..but Ideally not ribbed or too fine (I'll just wreck it).

Upto £100...I'm happy to invest if it will last

Thank you!

Posting here for traffic. It will be long but don't want to dripfeed / leave out anything that might be relevant.

For background context: DH & I work FT. He has one teenager from a previous relationship and we have 2 preschool aged children together. Stepson is 50/50 between here and his mothers home.

Now the AIBU: Last year SS mum signed him up to a travel sport without discussing with us. Essentially he would have 2 training sessions a week (one on her day, one on ours) and a game / tournament most weeks. These games are minimum 2 hours drive away from our home. Whilst obviously we are happy that he is playing a sport, we couldn't physically get him to the training during our access because of our work schedules and needing to collect other kids from childcare and having to feed everyone etc. For a few weeks his mum collected him from our house and dropped him back but she was always making nasty remarks about how we were lazy and unsupportive. We took him to pretty much every game / tournament which often meant lugging the young kids along or my DH missing out on a full day with them if it was too far. After a few weeks his mum just stopped collecting him during our days. He also missed probably 50% of the training on her days.

There have been half-term and summer camps that stepson has been signed up for and that we have either paid fully for or contributed toward. Out of a total of 9 days, he attended 2 days of the camps (on our time).

This year his mum has signed him up again and the revised training means it is 75% during our access. We live a 30 minute drive from the training grounds. We physically cannot get him to one day of the training (50%) again because we won't be finished work, collected from school and daycare and home to feed everyone before the session starts. My DH told his ex that we cannot take him this day and to facilitate it (because she's being quite nasty again saying we aren't supporting and we are full of obstacles) we could swap days so that the access arrangements all change by 1 day. That would mean that she took him every week on Wednesday (the day we can't do) and we would take him each week Friday. She has denied this and said its unreasonable because she wants Friday evenings with stepson too. That's fair and makes sense but the training sessions go on until 9pm so there's not really much Friday left unless of course she wasn't taking him?

We suggested that we just have that arrangement during the sport season, meaning it's only half the year. That was a no go. We suggested we trial it for a few weeks and see how it works, that was a no go. She has suggested that she will collect stepson and bring him back on the Wednesday. Are we being unreasonable to say that no, that doesn't suit us? Midweek one or both of us are often working late at night and we don't want to have to go to the meeting point at 9.30pm to pick up Stepson.

YABU: Just suck it up and struggle so he can do the sport, even though it's less than ideal for the rest of the family.

YANBU: You have offered solutions and the other parent needs to compromise too.

There have been loads of clips of Dolly Parton interviews around and articles with quotes and the more I watch and read, the more I think she was some kind of font of wisdom. An oracle. A prophet.

Her approach to life, everything, she was like Yoda in rhinestones. Just the perfect attitude, and a long, productive, inspirational life.

”Legend” is thrown around liberally but in her case it is fully deserved.

Dd has been renting with her boyfriend. She has told me they have discussed getting engaged next year. Out of the blue he was bought a beautiful flat in London by his family, and wants dd to move there with him. She would be paying rent for a finite period of time to cover certain costs.

My AIBU is that I feel if they plan to get engaged shortly, surely they should be buying together? We would have helped with a small deposit and dd earns as much as he does, if not more. I’m delighted for her boyfriend who I love, but also want DD to get onto the property ladder.

I have had some issues with my stomach for the last few years and find anything with a proper waistband incredibly uncomfortable after about an hour. It makes me feel horrendous and often lasts hours after I take the trousers off. I live in high waisted leggings, light jersey trousers or dresses with tights.

I lived in jeans until this all started and I’m desperate to get back into them but after an hour I’m so so uncomfortable that it ruins my day 😔
I recently bought DS (5yo) some chino type trousers for a smart occasion and thought they were fab as they had the waistband of a pair of joggers rather than make of the chino material!!

If I could get proper jeans but with a very soft waistband it would be a dream!

Unfortunately, I’m not fitting in an age 5-6y anytime soon 😅🤣 So I’m on the hunt!

Has anyone seen anything that fits the description? Every time I search for ideas it just brings up loads of links to Halara. I believe they are more of a light and thin material rather than proper denim though unfortunately!

I need to stop spending a fortune in pret or m&s during office days and be more organised with my lunches.
I have a long-ish commute (London), 1 hr and 15 mins or so, door to door. Office has a fridge but I am considering getting myself an insulated lunch bag to keep food fresh longer. I have seen some very lovely ones and wanted to treat myself to one but is it worth it? Curious to know how people use these. I don’t want to hold it with my hand as I commute with a backpack for practicality and comfort and want my hands free. They seem a bit too bulky to put in my backpack though once I also have the laptop, work stuff and change of shoes etc.
How does everyone do this? 😅

I’m not sure if this has already been posted but I noticed today that Ocado have got the M&S Christmas products now available to order.

I have a teenage daughter and y2k and late 90s ‘vintage’ clothing is very ‘in’ - hence I am on vinted etc looking at the very clothes I wore in my youth.

It has struck me that the quality is incredible - embroidery, proper pleats and waistbands and lots natural fibres. I had known this was the case with more traditional fashions from St Michael’s and C and A - but many of the clothes are from Primark and New Look. It seems that we were initially lured with very cheap pricing and poor fabrics and workmanship and now it’s no longer cheap - with poor fabric, along with no darts, waist bands, women’s shaping. It seems to be all smocking, elastic , unlined and so on. All the vintage shops in my town are sports wear/ shell suits/ carhartt and so on - I need to find these clothes!

Examples below. Wish I hadn’t dithered on the teal skirt. Although I am v reluctant to spend the £25 some sellers are asking for vintage primark clothes!

I am not sure how to word this without causing offence, judgment. If this does offend or cause upset know that was not my intention. My 80s upbringing likely has influenced my thought pattern.

I keep seeing videos around SEN and PDA, I understand that demands causes anxiety etc however I suppose my question what happens is as an adult you override this. For example you need to leave the house for appointment/ preplanned thing and child with PDA refuses. Why not just pick them up and put them in car/push chair etc. I know I know I sound harsh and child likely would cry and be upset BUT (please correct me happy to learn) they would calm down and realise the avoidance was necessary or justified. I suppose the videos I have seen it seems some parents enable the behaviour.

I fully expect to receive criticism as I know for many this is a sensitive subject but it’s by asking questions others can learn I have no child in my life with these difficulties so I don't understand but I would like to.

(title is suggested one)

I live in a 4 in a block. I'm top floor and my garden (private) is the one shown on the left of the photo, surrounded by the fence. Neighbour is beneath and the window shown is her bedroom window. Both fences are mine, previous owner paid for them and for them to be erected.

I get on well enough with downstairs neighbour however the issue is that every time I go out to the garden, she comes out and chats, for a good half hour. She's elderly and I get that she just wants to chat, I have no problem with a short chat now and then, but last time I was out there, I had a whole day free when DC was at their dads and so wanted to get cracking on the garden, she came out 5 separate times, 3 times to chat for ages and will sometimes stand watching me from her bedroom window, which is a little awkward.

I'm not sure if it would be unreaonable of me to heighten the fence a little to give me privacy? I don't want to completely block her light, just her view into my garden! I was thinking of popping a trellis on top, so that light still gets through. Maybe pop some climbing flowers on it. The taller fence that can be seen is 6ft tall, i was thinking of matching the trellis height to this. Local planning permission dictates 6ft 6 inches is the limit that you can have fences, so I don't think I would be breaking any local laws. I'm sure she will complain as she's quite fixed on how she thinks things should be, so I'm not sure if it's unreasonable of me to do this?

Need urgent advice please because I don't know what to make of this and I'm incapable of keeping my emotions in! Months ago I found the back of an earring on my bed and confronted DH because I'm sure it wasn't mine, he was very convincing that there was nothing untoward going on. Naive as this may sound I don't think he's the sort that would cheat, I don't see how he'd even have the time for it (he works full time and we have 2 young DC). So I chalked it up to the cleaner/something I'd forgotten that got caught up and moved inadvertently.

This evening I have just found half a fake nail on my upstairs landing and I have no explanation of where it could have come from. I've fully panicked and managed to look through DHs phone. I didn't find anything on WhatsApp, Facebook or text messages.

I do not know what to do. I want to confront him because I'm terrible at hiding my feelings but I assume if anything IS going on he will just play it off again. What should I do? Apologies for the rushed and possibly incoherent message! x