Has anyone had microbladed eyebrows removed? I had microblading done on Tuesday, and the brows are odd - one higher, arched, thin and light. The other is short, curved, dark and diferent altogether. I rang the salon the next morning and spoke with the woman who did it (she owns the salon). After a great deal of hostility from her, she asked me to go tomorrow morning ao that she can "sort it out". Googling it, it seems that the best method would be lasering, but I'm worried.

Hi,

Looking for some advice on a slightly complicated situation.

My partner and I are looking to relocate to New Zealand as I’ve recently been offered a job over there. We have a child together, and I’ve also been a dad to her older son for the last 7 years—he’s now 11.

The issue is that his biological father is on the birth certificate but hasn’t had any contact since he was around 6 months old. There’s been no involvement, no financial support, and we don’t know where he currently lives.

If we move, he would be going with his mum, his half-brother and step-sibling, so it would be the family unit staying together.

We’re trying to understand what the realistic options are for taking him abroad in this situation. Has anyone been through something similar where the other parent is completely absent? Did you need a court order, and how long did it take?

Also, if the father can’t be located, how does that work in practice?

Longer term I would look at adopting him if possible, but right now we just want to understand the correct legal route to relocate as a family.

We’re happy to go through the proper process, just trying to get a realistic idea of timescales and what to expect.

Thanks in advance.

Maybe it's cos everything has happened at once today, but I just hate having a woman's body, and DH doesn't know how lucky he is.

Meant to be going on a spa day tomorrow with my friend. Obviously I got my period today. It fucking hurts, is a mess, and makes tomorrow more difficult. On top of that I have to go through the rigmarole of hair removal. I hate having dark hair and having to shave my armpits most days. Just such a pain in the arse. Now I have to do my bikini line later as well, and woe betide me if my legs are ever prickly. And my bra has been giving me gyp at work all day too.

Just bugger off with it all.

DH has to worry about none of those things. Sometimes I just hate it. I can't really remember what it was like to be a kid and not have the hassle of these things either but they really are just so bloody annoying!! And we have childbirth. And I have the menopause to look forward to. Men can be as hairy as they like, have no periods, no bras, no anything. Aaarggh!

People

I can't afford it right now, but at some point over the next couple of years I want to buy myself a ring.

My marriage ended after 20 years. He never bought me a ring. That's okay, I don't want his poxy ring anyway. But I want to buy a ring from myself to myself, to wear every day.

Budget about £500? But if I find the perfect thing much cheaper that's fine. It's not about how much I spend.

I don't know what I want, but I'll know when I see it. I like stones. I don't like diamonds. I like flat and modern. Maybe a band with stones set in it? But not a rainbow of stones.

I think gold, not silver.

Maybe something with 4 stones, to represent me and my children?

Maybe it should just be about me?

I think I'm looking for something a bit cheesy tbh, to represent that I can do this by myself and I can rely on myself.

What would you buy yourself?

I've seen some posts here and various articles elsewhere speak of women reading smutty books as if it's equivalent to men watching porn.
I can see how if a woman read huge amounts of them they might have unrealistic expectations. How common is this though?

I've had the misfortune to read a few pages of masterpieces like 'Bull Moon Rising' and 'Morning Glory Milking Farm' and I think the 'monster mance' trend is quite grim. I also find the popularity of dark romance including rape & abuse disturbing.

So I agree with some criticisms of romance fiction trends. But isn't equivalent to porn. Porn usually involves real actors, and even if the scene isn't violent, pressure is rife, performers suffer from injuries, men are pressured into using viagra to keep erections going. None of these issues are present in romance fiction.

Romance fiction doesn't lead men to suffer physical harm either. What romance novel has led to men being choked or pressured into anal sex?

I feel that sometimes coverage seems to want to imply that men and women' faults are equivalent. But if one sex is worse at something, men or women, it should be permitted to say that : if that's the reality. And I think porn is clearly worse. This doesn't mean issues with romance fiction shouldn't be discussed, it just means there' no need to equate them

AIBU?

Hi I’m at a point where I don’t know whether to stay married to my husband. He has gotten into debt again. It’s been a repeated cycle through out our marriage.

our finances are separate, I have tried before to sit down and work out outgoings and incomings, but my husband said he would then back tracked. He pays the mortgage and bills. I used to give him some money towards the bill, not much, even when I was on disability benefits. I pay my own bills with my wage and stuff for our children.

he said he wouldn’t get in debt again and yet he has and now he wants to secure a loan against our house which will take 10 years to pay off, taking him into retirement. My name isn’t on the mortgage. He said that he will pay off the debts with the money and then he will have money spare each month to save and so we can do things. Currently can’t do anything as he has no money. I have offered to pay. Money has been spent on every day stuff and Xmas presents. I do buy most of the kids Xmas presents and all birthday, I also buy all their clothes.

Last year the neighbour behind us got a small dog. It yaps.

Anyway DH has been complaining to me about this irritating dog ever since she got it and admittedly it is very annoying but what can you do? It’s during the day and it’s not constant.

He’s been away with work for 3 days and has come back grumpy and tired - last night he went outside to check on his plants and the dog started yapping. DH went absolutely bonkers, started running up and down the fence barking and snarling like a dog until the woman came out and hastily took her dog back inside. Mortified!! I know he was tired but Jesus he was acting like a psychopath

Hes back at work today and she’s sat outside in the sun - do I pop my head over and apologise/explain or leave it and assume we’re no longer on good terms 😬

Just back from a trip into town to meet my friend for breakfast.

We went to a well known pub chain - both had a fry up each, washed down by a coffee and a pint (Guiness for me, cider for my friend).

DP has declared that very out of character and not a great way to start the day.

AIBU?

I've always known it's not the thing to do but now I wonder if I read it on here - been here a looooong time!

I only ask because my DD's MIL is apparently wearing predominantly white for their wedding and DD thinks she doesnt know it's inappropriate. DD does know but possibly from listening to me!

FWIW neither of us are particularly bothered - I dont think it's like one of those MILs you see in the DM where it looks like an actual wedding dress but I wonder if other guests will be a bit 😯

Right, I'll try to keep this breif but need some outside perspective. I dont want to feel like this anymore.I work long hours and bring in a good salaray. Sole earner for the family. DH gave up work years ago which made total sense when the DCs were small, childcare is expensive and someone needed to be around. No issue with that at all and I suported that decison fully. And before anyone says it, yes I've done the maths and with what he could realisticaly earn versus the cost of childcare and everything else, it genuinley wouldnt be worth it financially. So thats not really the point here.

Here's the thing though. Both DCs are now at school FT. So DH has a good chunk of the day completley free. And yet the basic stuff isn't getting done. I'm coming home after a long day and hanging out washing, tidying up etc. Meanwhile he's been on the gaming all afternoon. We even pay for a cleaner so its not like I'm expeting him to scrub the toilets, just the basic everyday stuff.
To be fair he does cook the evening meal everyday, I'll give him that.

Weekends I'm not exactley putting my feet up either. I make a real effort to be present and involed with the DCs and there activities. So between work, coming home to chores, and weekends with the DCs, I genuinley have zero time to myself.

The thing is I can feel the resentment seeping out of me in snide comments and little digs and I hate myself for it. DH doesnt deserve that and its not who I want to be. But I cant seem to stop it and I'm worried its starting to do real damage to our M.I'm not a naturally resentful person and it doesnt sit right with me. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you deal with it? Did the resentment ever go away or did you just have to have the awkward conversation?

Anyone else like this …?

I’m realising this is why I’ve slid into a ‘uniform’ of old jeans, hoodies and shabby sneakers. Thus us what I’ve worn for over ten years.

When a wedding or event comes along, it turns into a monumentally stressful shopping experience where I panic buy items I find uncomfortable, unsure suit me, and likely never wear again.

I have two events: a funeral on Friday and a weekend in Paris next weekend. I’ve been browsing online for days and woke up at 5 am this morning to continue scrolling and discovered my panic purchase for the funeral won’t arrive in time. I then panic purchased a pair of shoes I think look nice for meals out and the funeral, but already have doubts.

I wish I could break this cycle and be confident in what I wear.

I recently had a haircut I love and it inspired me to try hard again to ‘raise the bar’. But I’m hitting a familiar wall now and dreading the events, and just feeling tired and down about it. My DH just doesn’t have this …

Uuuugh!!

Here's my list:

Holidays with the family (kids under the age of 6.) Too expensive, the kids are always tired/vomiting/over-stimulated. Travelling is a fucking nightmare. There's at least two arguments with your partner. And you (being the woman) end up doing all the prep for about three weeks beforehand. When you come back it takes at least a week for you to get through all the washing. And you're exhausted.

Being on the beach. It's actually a bit shit all round. Sand everywhere. People get too hot and uncomfortable. Sand in the food. Warm drinks that have been left out in the sun. The kids end up with sand in their eyes and so do you. It's always really windy and the sea is miles out which means you have to walk for ages to get there. Someone gets bitten/cut by a rock/sunburnt/swallows loads of sea water and you give up and leave after about 2 hours of drama.

Eating out. Too expensive, better quality of cooking at home with fresh ingredients.

Paris. Dirty, smelly, you're followed everywhere by sleazy men trying to sell you stuff or pickpocket you. Everyone's really fucking rude as well

Having sex. It's a bit touch and go, most of the time it's slightly boring, the bloke normally orgasms before you and the people you really fancy - when you end up shagging it turns out to be rubbish after all that build up. Or they ooze sex appeal and charisma but they do something to give you the serious ick and your vagina slams shut.

Hen do's - end of.

I’m late 50s and other than trying the last couple of years, I haven’t work trainers since I was at school.

I quite like the trainers with a dress fashion so so I bought some trainer like shoes. They were so uncomfortable, they went.

I bought some more expensive ones from Clarks but other than in the house or out for something to eat I can’t wear them as they are uncomfortable.

I’ve tried no socks, trainer socks (these just look stupid), the smaller no show sock of numerous brands. The only time they are bearable is with opaque tights and that defeats the object.

I’ve had them on this morning, done some housework, and they have now been swapped for my trusty socks and boots.

Where am I going wrong? I don’t want to wear traditional trainers as I don’t think they look good with a skirt.

Hi everyone. I’m looking for some perspective as I’m feeling very uneasy following DH’s return from a stag weekend in Prague. Until now, I’ve had no reason to doubt him, but I’ve found a few things that aren't adding up.

• The Search History: While he was away, I saw searches on our shared tablet for a specific sex massage parlour, including map directions, and things like "Roly Poly show." He claims the group was just "having a laugh" and looking things up together.

• The Boxers: While doing the washing, I found a pair of his boxers with a white stain on the inside. He denies any physical contact or even masturbating the whole trip, saying he has "no idea" what it is.

• The "Joint" Dance: He eventually admitted the group of 10 had a "joint private dance" with the stag in a small room.

• The Text Message: I saw a message from his close friend sent at 2am on the second night asking, "How was it?" I haven't confronted him about this yet.

He has been patient, hasn't got flippant, and has offered me his phone and passwords. However, my ex-husband had an affair and left when I was 8 months pregnant, so my "radar" is sensitive.

Am I being paranoid due to my past, or is this a classic case of "what happens in Prague stays in Prague"? Does the 2am text suggest something happened that the rest of the group wasn't involved in?

I’ve been in a comfortable, low stress, in-house job for about 3 years now. On paper it sounds great- decent salary, great pension and flexibility, mostly WFH, huge amounts of autonomy. For the first year or so I absolutely loved it and it felt like the perfect antidote after being burnt out in previous role in law firm, but increasingly I’m struggling to find motivation and am just pretty bored. There’s zero scope for progression (dead man’s shoes scenario with no realistic prospect of the relevant people leaving) and in-house roles in my practice area only come up very rarely so feel a bit like I’m stagnating. I’m also starting to wonder whether - by moving in-house - I’ve actually lost a lot of the parts of the job I most enjoyed, eg BD, transaction management, training junior colleagues etc. Part of me wonders whether I should go back into PP but the other part of me worries I’d be trading boredom for stress. Has anyone else been in this position? What did you do?

Can’t afford a whole new routine but would like to introduce something - maybe a serum - to up my skincare game a bit.

Feels like I'm searching for something that doesn't exist.

My mobility and chronic pain has come to a head, and I can no longer wear my usual Birkenstocks or wedges that I'd wear in the summer. I need wear flat sandals, with a bit of structure over my toes and a heel strap, and can't have a chunky or thin sole. Can't tie around my ankle as sometimes one of my ankles swells from oedema. I also have a very high instep, so can't wear ones that cover my full foot.

I want ones where I can pull the ankle strap over my ankle, or a velcro strap so that I don't have to bend down too long to get them on.

All the ones I've found look like what my nana wears, with elasticated backs.

I liked these ones https://www.office.co.uk/view/product/office_catalog/2,60/5346085216 but DH laughed jokingly and said his mam would wear them, so didn't get them.

Budget is around £75 a pair. I'd like an everyday pair and a pair I could wear if going out to a beer garden or to look a bit fancier.

I am only a few weeks into a new role and already questioning whether I’ve made a mistake.

I raised a pretty basic contractual/HR query with the relevant person and got a completely disproportionate response,they were verbally aggressive, raised voice/shouting, threatening to worsen my conditions/change my contract (not in this persons power but they seem to like to think their power is bigger than it is). Their phsyical manner was such I thought this person was actually going to get physical. I held it together but was in floods of tears after. It is a very uncomfortable situation over something that should have been a normal conversation.

I’ve escalated it, not really by choice as the incident was overheard and I was asked what happened, and the bosses (small business) have acknowledged it and said they’ll come back to me, but have also made it clear this person is very long-standing, so I’m not expecting much to change. I was warned when I started by other staff that this person was difficult and to pay them no attention, but apparently the way they behaved with me was a notch higher than their usual ways, though a few people have told me this person left another woman in tears. I am about 30 years their junior and just in the door so as you can imagine this was really intimidating and I feel I'll never be able to settle there now.

Feels like I will be asked to just work around them, but I guess how the company reacts will tell me what I need to know. This person isn't due to be in the office for a couple of weeks.

I’m conscious I’m earlyish in my career (recent change), I want a supportive environment, but equally don’t want to jump ship too quickly and explain this on my cv. I've thrown the feelers out about some other roles but really don't know what to do.

Help, I'm really down about the whole thing.

Basicallly I don’t know what to do with a dog that I’m scared of and don’t want in my house.
My partner got the dog without asking because his friends dog had puppies. I’ve never owned a dog in my life and first as it was young it was fine.

then the dog got older and it’s a large dog, I don’t want to say the breed, but it’s big. I’m more of a cat person although I don’t have cats atm.
anyway my partner works away. Often I’m alone with the dog and my 3 youngest kids.

My eldest boys don’t live away but they’re often out wirh friends especially at the weekend.
They do come home in the evening obviously as they’re only 14 and 12. But then home they do the dog care because I am scared of the dog. They do the feed and walk etc. but weekends from around 11am to 11pm it’s all on me.

The dog isn’t super aggressive but he’s had his moments. I’m rambling I’m so sorry I’m just not sure what to do and where I can go. Partner doesn’t listen, my eldest kids like the dogs, youngest 3 are scared but may be because they’ve picked it up from me.
i don’t want the dog to be put to spew he’s only bitten twice within the family. No where will take him when I ask and say theyre full.
please can someone give advice and options I asked on FB groups and got bad things said and even mocking of my account photos and children which were just day to day photos and really unjustified thabjs

It’s me by the way and that’s the case for my clothes

Just that really, I’m expecting in September we have a 8&6 year old boy and girl, plan is for the older two to share for a year or two and then whichever sex the new child is they will then share further down the line.

coming up for a remortgage in October and we think we are just going to pull a bit of money out to pay off a few things so we are a bit more comfortable on mat leave.

anyway do yours all have their own room? Does it work for you? I always shared when I was little and I enjoyed sharing with my sister x

I feel like with the cost of living etc I really don’t want to have a big mortgage I’d rather have more freedom for holidays etc

I had such great responses the last time I asked for help here, I thought I would come back for more.😍

How would you style this dress?
Black and gold option
I'm lucky enough to have been nominated for an award in my industry and so it is for the awards ceremony. It's the black and gold version. The gold detailing is quite a dark gold. I only have pale gold heels which didn't seem to really go but were also quite covered/chunky which I don't think helped either (just tried on for height ref 😊). That made me think perhaps black strappy heels but perhaps that's too boring, so I've circled back to gold - but I think would need to be a strong gold. Open to other ideas too! I'd love suggestions for a bag, shoes and accessories if anyone has any ideas.

For reference I am 5 foot 8, a size 12 and late 30s with long brunette hair. I was going to do a half up, half down style for my hair. I love the dress - it's very flattering and suits the event theme perfectly.

Thank you in advance for any help.

I was made redundant around a year ago. I started applying for other jobs the day I was made redundant and for the past year I’ve spent every day writing job applications. No holiday, no break, just job applications.

I’ve not managed to get any work since. For context, I was at a fairly senior level, think for example, Head of Marketing (not that, but that sort of level). Jobs at my level are not overly common and often go to someone in the team ready for promotion, so it’s hard to get as an external candidate. I looked into senior-level consulting in the relevant field but didn’t get any interest. Jobs at a more junior level are turning me down for being over-experienced and likely to move on quickly to something else (real feedback received multiple times), even though I make it clear I’m willing to commit.

I’ve also tried to get “just any job” that everyone suggests would be easy. Cleaning, supermarket, etc. I’m not managing to get anything at all! No one will give me any work.

I’m running out of money and I’m in a state of panic about what to do. I applied for benefits, I get some money each month but it doesn’t cover all my outgoings so I’ve used up all of my savings and I’m starting to build debt.

Panic panic panic! What do I do? How can I get some work - any work at all? I’m desperate to earn some money. Any suggestions really welcome.

I'm just drinking my first cuppa of the day, in my conservatory spot. The cats have had breakfast & I can hear the girls playing with girl cat. Boy cat's gone to see what's going on. The washer's on for uniform and work stuff, I've put last night's pots to soak, and had a tidy round in the kitchen.

I'm off for a wander of the big B&M today. I want new tea/coffee/sugar pots to go with the newly decorated kitchen (if they have any), and some more gloss paint. B&M will tell me the rest of my list 🤣. I'll pick up some gold and silver markers from The Works nearby while I'm there.

Dd1's at work so isn't coming - she wants to go to top up some bits before heading back to London but we'll do that another day.

Dd2 is currently scrolling Vinted for gold heels, after picking her prom dress yesterday 😊. She's gone for a teal/green colour & it fits like it was made for her! Just needs <that> much off the bottom once she has her shoes on.

When I'm back, I'll sand either the bookshelf I want to re-vamp for the conservatory, the filler at the end, or both 🤔 so I can carry on painting tomorrow. I've invited a few friends for drinks in a fortnight so would like it sort of done by then.

Tea is leftover Chinese takeaway with a couple of glasses of wine. Then chill for what's left of the evening before bed so I'm up early ish tomorrow.

What about all of you? 🙂