My 13 year old is struggling at French lessons at school and was sad about this, so I paid for an app to help with learning French. I also set her up on Duolingo. She didn't use either. I explained that she asked for help, I got her the app and now she's not using it, and suggested that at do it together. She did it a bit but was really reluctant and grumpy. After a while she refused to do it and said it didn't help anyway. I said that her French is improving but it takes time, but she insisted it was useless. I was a bit annoyed that she was so ungrateful and said "fine do it yourself. I've tried, you don't want my help, so I'll cancel the subscription". She's now struggling again with French, but I'm not going to fight with her to learn.

Today she was doing her homework and needed coloring pens. I have a box of colouring pens that we've accumulated over the years and she was going through them choosing the ones she wanted. I asked her to bin any that she found that didn't work. She looked at the box with contempt and said that none of them work and they should all be binned. I don't keep this box of pens for me, I keep them for her and I feel that whatever I do for her is not good enough. So I picked up the entire box and chucked it in the bin. Most of the pens were fine and I'm so tired of the ridiculous untrue sweeping statements of how crap everything is.

Baby girl Alkelda, I think it's lovely what are your thoughts

Money is tight here. But we own our home outright. We never had inheritance money and we want to ensure something is left to our kids. We want the sort of will where the title deeds are changed to tenants in common. We also want POA done for both of us. Im not entirely sure why this is needed but Martin lewis says it is so...

All this will cost 1000s. And we could so do with a holiday.

What would you spend the money on? We are both early 60s, kids are single adults, both renting.

I’m 34 (almost 35). I feel like age is really adding another layer of intense pressure and I’m really losing hope with every failed cycle. I wish I hadn’t waited so long. With every passing month I just imagine the few eggs I have (only god knows what quality they are) withering away!

Opinions please! I can’t get seem
to get rid of my broodiness for for 3rd child. We currently have a 9 & 5 year old, I’m 37 and DH 41. Would it be a huge mistake to start over again? I’d love to hear from those who have a similar gap or those who had a 3rd ‘later in life’ with a bigger gap. Financially we are ok with a 4 bed house but no family help.

Does anyone have a 9-5 job and good work life balance? Ie most of the time they’re able to log off at 5 and not think about work or do any work until the next day.

If so, please tell me your job and what kind of place you work

I’m in a corporate job and exhausted from the endless long hours and having no life. I want to make a change.

I just need some advice on whether this issue is worth pursuing. Back in 2024 a new manager was put in post. She felt my role had more responsibility than it was banded as and started a job evaluation process. She specifically said, and I have it in two separate emails, that if it was successful that I would be back paid from this day in 2024 and any incremental raises would date from this point too.

It was such a long process and it actually took until December 2025 to get a formal written record of the outcome of my job evaluation. It confirmed I would be upbanded and would be effective from the date in 2024.

For some reason due to financial constraints it had to go through an approval to recruit panel after this as a final check. They agreed the post but said they would only backdate my pay by 6 months not 15 months as this was the date the evaluation was sent to the panel. Basically my manager changed and it took the next person 5 months to submit it which is not really something I feel I should be penalised for.

As far as I am aware, the NHS job evaluation handbook advises that the agreed date in 2024 is the one that should be followed. I therefore on my unions advice submitted a grievance to Human Resources, this was instantly downgraded to a pre formal grievance and then I was told to wait.

I have now been told that I will not be getting bsckpay from 2024, no actual explanation, just an apology that it took so long but it wasn't upheld and that the Trust would not accept me taking it further as a formal grievance

Does anyone know what my rights are? I am genuinely surprised that even though I submitted written evidence that this was rejected out of hand.

There is a lot more I can add if it's relevant so I am really hoping that someone with a bit of knowledge in this area could advise and if more info is needed then let me know.

For some time Now my house has had a strong earthy / bad feet kind of smell that hits you when you walk in the house, especially in hot weather. I managed to track it down to the living room but couldn’t work out its source . With the good weather we have been having I decided to wash my cushion covers so bagged up the duck feather filled cushion inserts and put them in the garage a few days ago . It seems that was the source of the smell . My living room smells so much better . I didn’t know duck filled inserts could eventually smell like that , I have had them for years !

Fabric sofas, kids and a smelly dog do not mix. I wash the sofa cushions when I can be arsed but I’ve been wondering if one of those hand held steam cleaning devices might freshen the place up a bit. I’ve seen a few online but they are way over £100 and that’s a lot of money for something so boring. If you have one, are they worth it? Do they do a good job?

Hi everyone, my son will be taking the King’s and SPJS 7+ exams this year. I checked the King’s website and noticed that they seem to have updated their specimen paper for this year, and it looks completely different from previous years.
It says that the maths assessment will only include addition and subtraction, with no multiplication or division. I have to say I’m quite surprised, as almost all of the new sample questions seem relatively easy compared with the previous specimen paper.
Would you take the new specimen paper at face value and focus mainly on what they’ve listed, leaving out some of the other maths topics for King’s? Or would you still prepare for the broader range of topics just in case?

I’m currently 32 weeks pregnant, I’ve been on clexane since 7 weeks every day, occasionally had the odd day I can’t get one in even when changing the needle, however the past 5 days I haven’t been able to inject into my stomach it just won’t go in, I’ve obviously now missed more than I should have what can I do? I will try speak to the pharmacist tomorrow to see if they can advise but hoping someone here could also offer some tips if possible. In my last pregnancy I had gestational diabetes and could also inject into my thighs, is it the same for clexane? When I was prescribed my consultant said stomach didn’t give other options

My husband went for a walk tonight, when he got home he told me there was a woman walking in front of him with tiny Lycra shorts on, he said he just ‘didn’t know where to look,’.

He said loads of men in cars beeped at her and one car nearly crashed trying to get a better look at her.

He couldn’t wait to tell me.

I felt weird after he told me, I started back at the gym today for the first time In ages.

im not sure why but it made me feel off, like he got some weird kick out if it.

I found out today my DSis eloped at the weekend & married the father of her children. I'm so so upset. Not by her wedding, people can have whatever wedding they choose, but by the fact she never told anyone? My poor mum does so much for her & we all speak daily. I thought we were close but obviously not and I feel like all the trust has gone.
AIBU to be hurt?

Hi guys. I know a lot of you might be thinking I am being so silly with this, but I am going through it a bit right now.

I (F25) have been with my (now ex) boyfriend for almost 6 years. We met in the first week of university and have had such a beautiful love since. He has never been the most communicative, and I think I have experienced a lot of feeling as though he was never as into me as I was to him, never as invested, and never as obsessed as me. The beggining of the year we were discussing whether to move in together, I sort of made the argument that it's been 5 years, so I am a ittle concerned that he has never considered it. He flip flopped on the topic for months, utimately decided that he did want to live with me, and then I requested that he reassured me. he never reassured me, never led on the process of flat viewings.

I had a pretty fair, frank, firm conversation with him in May that I wasn't having my emotional needs met. He didn't really fight for us, just withdrew. I then poured effort into the relationship more and more and things got really good. Fantastic even. He then blindsides me saying that he is worried that he can't be man I need and he wants us to work long term but he needs space. We then essentially took a break for two months (where unfortunately he held all the power), but constantly reassured me that he took some time to see a therapist and get on the right tracks. We have been seeing eachother for a month and it's gone fanstatically.

Says he is going to pick me up from mine saturday night for a date. I am SO excited. Ends up blindsiding me entirely with 'people told me I seem happier without you', 'having you less in my life I have enjoyed' and says that right now, what he wants is to develop as a man independently.

The last thing he ever said to me was that he wants us to work and loves me so much.

Turns out months ago he also snogged another girl at a party and flirted with her afterward. Unbelievably painful.

Entirely blindsided, can't eat, can't sleep, everything reminds me of him. It's clear he doesn't want me and that he is therefore not my person, but I am terrified at the thought of others/him getting into a reationship/ never finding anybidy again.

Please could I have some positive advice/stories/pep talks? This is horrendous and the thought of him becoming a stranger and him having a life without me is killing me. He has desamated me. I was entirely convinced I was going to spend the rest of my life with this man.

We have Ikea (Aspudden) pale grey kitchen with an oak worktop...and we need to replace our flooring as our lino is beyond wrecked.
Either decent lino or Karndean Amtico type stuff, but I just have no idea what to get. White/grey looks cold I think... and I don't know if I want oak coloured plank like, or stone paving like... I am no good at visualising stuff.
Can anyone recommend any good 'ideas' sites (or just any ideas!) Thanks!

On Saturday morning, a woman reversed into our fence. She lives out the back of us - don’t know her at all as we are in a very small cul de sac of 4 houses and she lives over the back where there are parking spaces outside of a few houses.

I didn’t realise she’d done it as it’s in our back garden - until she knocked on my door and told me. I’m grateful she was honest about it and commend her for doing so as we genuinely would have been so puzzled otherwise

She said she was on heavy duty antibiotics and had her two small children in the car and just misjudged. We went into the garden to see the damage - and yeah. She’s caved in the fence, torn it from the posts and it cannot be put back into place

I took her number, told her not to stress , thanked her for letting me know and advised I’d be in touch once I’d got a quote for the damage and we’d take it from there

A local fencing guy came out - we’ve used him on and off for years. The upshot is, it’s almost £400 to put right (we do not have basic fence panels .. I’ve no idea what they’re called but they’re grooved with horizontal posts across them)

I sent her over the quote and she messaged back to say she’s a single parent in social housing and she doesn’t know what to do

So. What do I do? Tell her to go through her insurance? I appreciate an excess payment can be a lot. Do we suck up the cost ourselves and ‘be kind?’ ( we can afford to do this if we have to BUT not easily on a whim and not without feeling it) or .. something else?

What would you do?

Hear me out, I have the uniqlo bags and wear them daily for the school run but I feel like they look really unflattering on me. I want to look more stylish but my bags just end up rolling off my shoulders! Any thoughts? What bags do you carry for the school run, which look stylish

I have come across an article today about Discard, which is when one partner effectively disavows their connection to the spouse in every way that they can. It creates a whole new narrative designed to protect them and justify their actions.

This article perfectly describes the way my ex has treated me and the impact it has. It's not a proven psychological theory but it's interesting that this behaviour pattern is starting to be more widely recognised. Reading it has certainly made me feel heard and validated in a way that nothing else I have come across. All the puzzle pieces fit this description.

medium.com/@thediscardproject/discard-in-long-term-relationships-psychological-violence-erasure-and-coercive-control-38e4629a537a

As someone who had a stepfather from age 3 to 28 that recently cut me off when he divorced my Mother, am I unreasonable in thinking that takes a particularly nasty type of person?

To be clear I think it’s different if relationships are shorter term, if the children are adults when the step parent enters the family, or if the step parent isn’t involved eg someone you see once or twice a year.

This man raised me, he was the only father I ever had, he came to every single event in my life including my wedding day where he walked me down the aisle, my two graduations, the hospital visit the day I gave birth to my first child, my children knew him as Grandpa.

He had an affair and I stayed out of it as I loved him and my Mother and I supported my Mother whilst also maintaining a relationship with him and one day he blocked me and my husband on everything without a single explanation. No fallout, no meddling on our end, no taking sides in the divorce etc. He’s now married to his affair partner and my husband has tried to tell me it’s likely guilt that made him cut me off but the hurt is a lot.

Has anyone else had similar?

Desperately seeking after school clubs, around Crawley area if possible. Steam related. Has anyone found anything please

Please can I have a sense check about how to deal with this. I want to make things better, not worse, for DS.

For context, he is in Y5, autistic, high masking, very bright, very anxious, sociable but not socially confident. Doesn't tell us much at all about school, does not tell teachers about issues there and very rarely tells us, even.

We moved house and school about 18 months ago, I've felt very conflicted about this but ultimately decided it would be better for DS in the long run (he's now at a feeder school for the secondary he will go to, which should make the transition slightly easier).

He was happy and popular at his old school, but struggled with the move, complained a lot about teasing after he first started at the new school. He did actually tell us and his teacher at the time and we thought it had calmed down, he stopped mentioning it anyway.

But we have recently discovered that a boy in his year (different class) is bullying him, frequent unkind comments when the adults are out of earshot, during break, lunch and after-school club. I emailed the school and their response has been woeful so far. Short reply saying they would investigate and get back to me, and they haven't (it's been 3 weeks). Checked website for anti-bullying policy and it barely says anything. I cracked today, sent a more strongly worded email and asked his teacher to call me which she finally did. She asked what we want her to do (!) and I suggested talking to him PRIVATELY about it. We agreed I would tell DS that I've spoken to his teacher and we've agreed she will talk to him.

So I told DS this tonight, he was very upset and angry with me, says he should never have told me anything, and that telling the teacher will make it all worse :( I now feel as if I've done the wrong thing and broken his trust.

DS says "he's used to it now" and he doesn't care. But bullying is not ok, dammit. I was bullied myself at school and it was horrific. I don't want DS to suffer in the same way but have no idea how to protect him from it. I don't want to project either. Arrrrggghhhh :(

Hello,
First winter in my draughty north facing mid renovation Victorian house looming. I’m already cold. What hacks do you have. Do I need small heaters? Heated blankets? Dehumidifier? There must be some way to make it better apart from hot water bottles. I have central heating, but need to seriously supplement it.
Yours freezingly,
slugjelly

I am a 27 year old man. For now many aspects of my life are great - good job, fitness, more than comfortable safety net in the bank and a almost paid off (small) flat.
The issue is I no matter how attractive I think I am I have never been in a relationship and don't think of marriage while many people my age are married.

The issue is if I ask myself why I want a relationship is to feel validated by women which is a reason why many people step into relationships and suffer, they suffer a lot.

So, it feels like a Catch 22 To get a relationship I need to stop wanting a relationship due to the main reason I want it.
Maybe somewhere in the mix there is 1% desire for intimacy but I can't forget about the 99% left which is desire for validation.

Should I try to stop believing that a relationship and the intimacy it leads to will ever be a part of my life?

Also, another reason that bugs me is that I believe a woman hypothetically want me for my flat, steal it by forging documents and then go off to someone who she is more attracted to. Its embarrassing even to write it anonymously, yet I have these doubts which stem for my low confidence. I understand I need to fix my confidence before a relationship yet if I can't does that mean I will never experience the love I see every weekend in parks couples holding hands and laughing, embracing and kissing.

I spend an increasing amount of time on mumsnet. It feels concerning that I turn here rather than feel I can turn to people in real life and feel connection.

I have been having a difficult time and I feel lonely. I don't want to say too much about my situation. Only that I have a plethora of mental health issues relating to childhood trauma and a possible ND. The health system have not been supportive. I am paying privately for some therapy and its going to take a long time I feel to make progress.
In spite of having a couple of adults in my life, I don't suppose I feel properly heard or seen. I am probably asking too much as I have a lot going on and a lot to talk about which is centred around me and I think it gets wearing for others.
I feel lost trying to work through my issues, build a new social network and a few major life transitions; forced early retirement due to my poor mental health, menopause and eldest dc going away to uni. Other things have happened in life too. It feels like an ongoing saga.

Posting to see if anyone can relate/feels the same?

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/general_health/5583531-to-be-perplexed-by-the-recent-findings-from-researchers-why-are-glp-1s-being-restricted?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share