We have been potty training our 2 year old for 2.5 months, he is mostly good with wee’s and will go when we take him (he doesn’t tell us he needs to go yet) and doesn’t have many accidents. Poop is a different story, when we first started he would tell us he needs to poop and would go in the potty. Now he just poops in his pants 90% of the time, we have tried everything. Sitting him on potty after meals, sticker charts, chocolate buttons, rewards. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore, it’s like he doesn’t care at all and will happily walk around with poo in his pants. Help!!

The last thread filled up so here's a new one for cosy autumn styles (and pyjama days).

I'm back home from the office and straight into pyjamas. At work, I wore a checkered skirt from Boden, a white cotton shirt, beige cardigan, black tights and beige-and-black flat Mary-Janes from Vivaia. I thought I looked quite put-together until I caught sight of my reflection and realised I looked like a particularly bland biscuit. I'm now hunting for excitement in the burgundy cardigan thread.

I need to get some advice.

My partner booked a weekend away for us for next weekend. It was a last minute thing about 2 weeks ago he booked it. I meant to tell the office but I never got a chance to do it. Basically flying late Friday night and coming back Monday night.

I know if I was to tell the office now I will be scolded. Big time for not giving more notice.

My hours on a Friday is usually 1 to about 8 or 9 or 10. I could go in earlier and try and finish earlier but I know if I go into work at all, there isn't a hope in hell they will let me off early. It's not going to happen. We would really have to be on the road by 6.30 for a long drive to the airport.

So what do I do. Do I notify the office tomorrow or will I lie and maybe pretend to be sick next Friday and Monday or will I lie again and say I have a funeral to go to up the country. Maybe someone of my partners family or something or another. Just a lie.

Footbalo

Going on about Birkenstocks
Have a family inheritance
Private schools for kids
Saving loads for their Retirement or kids UNI

Yes we are all from different walks in life and that's what makes mums (or mumsnet) great!

I just feel I cannot relate to this site anymore!

If you had to name one or two things that you have done to make your life more peaceful/calmer - what were they?

I was 22

I need some advice on what to do about my relationship. DH and I have been married for 16 years (together for 5 before that). We have 2 kids age 12 and 15. Generally things are fine, but we had issues last year and ever since then, there’s something in the back of my mind that just isn’t the same anymore.

As background, about a year ago we had some issues. We started arguing about the fact that I was overwhelmed with doing everything and he had become very lazy. He was also giving me the silent treatment if we didn’t have sex for more than a week. When this happened, the only way he would get out of his ‘mood’ was if we had sex – you can imagine how this played out. But it got to the point where this happened everytime. Things got quite bad between us because of various things (I wont bore you with all the details), so I suggested couples therapy. This did not go down well and then we started arguing about this too! Eventually, I felt I needed help and needed to talk things through with someone independent, so I went to therapy alone. I didn’t tell him straight away, as I knew the reaction I would get, so when he did find out, he didn’t like it – and then made me feel really bad about going – he also kept asking me what I was telling the therapist and what we were talking about.

He then, all of a sudden, decided he would come to a therapy session with me – I felt the session went really well and the therapist pointed out things we could both work on. As soon as we left the session, he kicked off and basically said he felt blindsided by it, and said that we (me and the therapist) had obviously discussed what she was going to say to him and make him feel bad! He basically only came along to try and find out what I’d been saying. After that, we didn’t go back ☹

We did eventually sort things out. He did eventually admit that he is quite insecure and sometimes, because I’m not a very affectionate person (never have been), he felt that I didn’t love him - and that was why he would give me the silent treatment. I am also going through perimenopause and started on some hormone patches, which did help my mood, and made me feel less overwhelmed. We basically agreed to communicate more and worked through things without the help of a therapist.

Fast forward to now – although things are much better, I just can’t shake this feeling in the back of my mind that things are not back to how they were and probably never will be. Things did get quite nasty between us previously and it just feels like there’s a bit of an awkwardness between us now.

We do still argue on occasion - we had a bit of a row this morning – he hadn’t given me some important information, so I got annoyed with him and then he just had a go at me because I was annoyed with him. Instead of just saying ‘sorry’ he just pushed it all back on me! It’s exhausting ☹

Is it bad that sometimes I sit there and think ‘would all this be easier on my own’? Any advice on how to deal with things would be helpful.

Will be spending afew days in Canterbury soon and love your recommendation for a decent meal. We like traditional pubs but not the kind of place everyone stares at you or Thai is a good option too. Thanks

I feel like I'm a bit unhinged at the moment.

I had to have my cat put down 5 days ago so obviously, I'm grieving.

But in the 12-24 hours before I had to rush to the vets where he was an inpatient to be with him while he was to PTS, I kept seeing him around the house. When I saw him, I was still hoping he could survive, so it wasn't that I was predicting his death at all.

I don't believe in ghosts. I'm not a spiritual person. And he was still alive at that point, but just not at home. Yet I saw him several times. In the living room, in the hall, in a bedroom.

I've heard him since he died, but not had the visions again. I'm so used to dismissing the sounds of him around the house, that it doesn't occur to me until later that he's not here anymore.

Has anyone else experienced any of this? I just don't know what to think really. I'd love to think he's here with me. But it goes against my general belief system.

The long and short is, I'm in that horrible hormonal stage when you're stopping breastfeeding and I feel awful. I am fully aware this is kindly Mother Nature's way of guilt-tripping you into carrying on, because until very recently, if you couldn't breastfeed a baby, that baby would be in serious trouble.

My baby is just fine. He is a healthy, huge chonk. But I feel awful.

I have no issue with formula feeding. Would totally happily go over to full-time formula, except 1) those bloody hormones and 2) he really minds. He often makes a huge fuss about getting formula, and recently when he had a cold, he totally refuses it. I burnt through my entire stock of expressed milk and he was feeding all the time. On the rare occasions he does manage to latch on he is so pleased with himself, and when I feed him expressed milk in a bottle, he is delighted.

But ... he's 3.5 months old and he's had some formula almost the whole way through. We've had various setbacks - I lost 1.2 litres during birth which delayed my milk coming in (during the heatwave, so he really needed fluids); he's a very big and hungry baby; he struggles to latch (I've got very flat nipples and he can't find a comfy position). We have tried all the things - counsellors, support groups, nipple shields, blah blah. I express, and I am expert at popping him on the boob when the milk is in full flow. But it doesn't work for him, and I can't get my supply up enough with expressing, and I'm on my own and just struggle with getting time to express. Basically, what I'm saying is, I don't think there's much we've not tried. We've just run out of road.

I think the one thing I can work on now is the hormones. So, if you can, please tell me how boring breastfeeding was for you? I really need stories of how it was no great shakes, and you did it dutifully for a year but you hated it/ you breastfed one baby and FF another and you can't even remember feeling any difference/ you did it but so many other things felt more important.

I am struggling so much to remind myself that this is just a tiny stage in his life, and it won't feel important when he's older.

She’s out of the coma and talking to her lawyers. Aibu to think the state of Tennessee can’t possibly try to do the lethal injection again ? Surely not? People on Reddit are suggesting she might need an amputation of one of her arms because of how caustic pentobarbital is.

Christa Pike 'conscious and speaking at hospital' after failed execution in US
https://news.sky.com/share/13595950

Dd1 (about to be 17) is very particular. They cannot feel sweaty. They must be machine washable. They need a substantial sole you cannot feel the floor through. I doubt get feet will grow now so happy to spend a bit.

please tell me about your non awful slippers and dd2 and I are happy with fluffy ones from Tesco’s 😂

Please help me! My son is getting married in 8 weeks and I haven’t a clue what to wear. So far I’ve ordered three dresses online (Coast, Lavish Alice and Florere) and have sent them all back. Earlier this week I had a personal stylist appointment at John Lewis, bought 3 items (Hobbs dress, Reiss dress and Phase Eight jumpsuit), but not sure any of them are right. Also ordered a jumpsuit from Me+Em, not yet received. I don’t know if that will be right either, I know it will need shortening about 6 inches!
I’m 5’3, 9st 6, have lost 7 stone over last 3 years. Blue eyes, brown hair/blond highlights. i think the colours that suit me best are greens/golds/sandy but not at all rigid except that pastel colours make me look washed out.
There’s a register office wedding service and then the bigger wedding ‘do’ 3 days later, so I need two outfits! Budget about £400ish for both. I just feel so much of what I’m seeing is so ‘bland’ and ordinary, I want to feel a bit more cool and funky but still smart of course.
Would really appreciate some help or suggestions of makers/brands I’m not aware of… thanks in advance.

Hi there, DP and I live together however as the years have gone by and I am finding his behaviours increasingly difficult to deal with. He has some OCD behaviour relating to saving insects. This means if I go outside and there is ants visible on the ground I will be guided in different directions and told where to walk. If there is a fly or a spider on windscreen or the car, we have to pull over to move it off to a bush, sometimes he’ll walk all the way down the street to find an ‘ appropriate space’. This happens several times a day. If he finds a dead insect ie a wood louse he will have to convince himself it’s truly dead before he can bin it, so it lays sat on top of a tissue paper in various places around the house, often for days, and gets distressed if I move it or throw it away. It’s impossible to go for a country walk with him as she seems to be constantly scanning the floor looking for things and invariable will keep stopping to examine areas and tinker on with something he thinks needs help. This ultimately means I am always stuck waiting for him to finish what he is doing. The issues is not he is helping animals it’s the extreme nature of it. He has undergone OCD therapy twice and it hasn’t worked, I think fundamentally because he believes in looking after all creature great and small so some of what he does is his core belief. Im constantly finding myself stifling my frustrations over me continually having to adjust to this, and when I do blow, I find myself guilty or that I am the bad person for trying to stop behaviours which he ultimately feels is doing good.
anyone else have any similar experiences or other means of coping with this?

I'm a single mum to two teens, don't love cooking but can do it and love food! I am making the same meals week in week out and getting very bored.

What meals do you make for your family that are really truly easy (like 30 mins prep easy, no special equipment?) and not too pricey? Things that take ages in an oven are fine but not loads of chopping and multiple steps etc as I have a busy WFH job. The teens are not fussy and have good appetites.

Also be great to hear of any meals your teens make, so I can hopefully outsource some of the cooking :)

I live in another European country and get back to the UK once a year or so. I’m going back next week and want to try some new products that are only available in the UK, mainly Boots and Superdrug for beauty and skincare. I’m very open to clothing recommendations also!

For info, I have dry skin, with dry and damaged hair, and am about a size 12 in clothes.

What are your best UK style and beauty buys that you could share with me?

Thanks in advance!

Looking for a nice 21st gift for friend’s daughter up to £150 please! M

Our neighbour has put their house on the market and we love it! It has bags of potential. It ticks most of our boxes. 3 good size bedrooms, detached, garage, off road parking and room out the back to extend if we wanted to. We really like the location but we do need some more space.

It is very dated but has good bones. We would have to open up downstairs as it’s currently 8 tiny rooms. It’s very bizarre! Upstairs is perfect in terms of layout so it would be simply us redecorating to modernise and make it suit our taste. The olive green toilet has to go! 😂 The main work would be the downstairs layout and new kitchen for us.

It has been on the market for 5 months but it is so overpriced, I know it’s very unlikely to sell. They have said they’ve had no offers and only 3 viewings which were all in the first week when it hit the market. We couldn’t pay full asking and do the work to the house as we would be in negative equity. Most of the houses on our road are semis bar two detached, this one and another on the other end of the road. The other semi sold last year for £610k and this one is up for £800k. Arguably, the other house that sold last year has a better plot. It didn’t need as much work downstairs but I’m sure the current owners would argue that’s preference. We weren’t in a position to move last year or we would have bought that house.

The market doesn’t seem to have progressed to the point this house is now worth an extra 200k. Properties don’t seem to be selling so if anything, it’s worth less. They of course can market the house for whatever they like but all of this to ask, simply, would you even bother viewing/ offering? If they weren’t our neighbours, I would explain to the EA and make the offer. What I don’t want to do, is forever sour relations!

For context, I work at a hospital.

I’m sat waiting for a lift home and a woman, obviously a patient, has come and sat next to me and lit up a cigarette. She’s facing towards me each time she exhales her smoke. We’re right under a smoke free site sign!

AIBU or should there be security making sure this type of thing doesn’t happen? For all she knows I’m a patient here for a respiratory illness, having cigarette smoke blown on me! It’s absolutely vile, it’s making me feel sick and giving me a headache, but there’s nowhere else for me to wait for my lift.

I have just achieved my level 3 in lead adult carer, this has been with blood sweat and tears as most of it was completed while I've been very ill. I would love to treat myself to something nice im 5.6 and a size 14 to 16 hourglass shape, does anyone have any recommendations, I love barrel leg trousers and im very much a cute shirt dress or mini dress person im 56 and love blues and pinks, if you were me what would you get,?

I usually buy a Christmas dinner box where everything arrives frozen and prepped. Thinking of trying to make ahead things myself. Does anyone have any tried and tested recipes for xmas dinner veg / nut roast / desserts that i could make and freeze? And an idea of how long it would keep?

The boundary line has a weird cut out and it’s freshly boxed in in the garden, but in the pictures the box (and thus boundary line) look like they jut into the property. What on earth could be the reason for this? https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/91378401

I've just read a hilarious Threads about this.

Go to your amazon account > shopping preferences > scroll down > about you.

Mine is fairly tame "has a cat" "travels regularly" "regularly purchases skincare" etc but some of the screenshots on threads were fantastic -

"Has flat buttocks:
"Likes to buy hats for their dog"
"Had a relationship with La Toya Jackson"
"Has no friends"

What does your amazon think of you??

Been dating someone for around a year. He wants to live together but I’m very protective of my space, very houseproud and wasn’t sure if I could handle it so we started spending the odd weekend night at each others houses to trial things.

I found his house utterly depressing. There is no colour, none of the furniture match and it’s all old and plain. And by old I don’t mean tastefully old but decades old Argos style furniture all scuffed etc. It smells funny and nothing seems to have its place. I started making excuses not to go and in the end told him why so he said it’s because he never had visitors so didn’t see the point.

When he stayed at my house I had to regularly remind him to take his shoes off in the hallway, to put the coffee jar back it it’s place after moving it, to bin packets rather than just leaving them around etc

Hes getting desperate to move in so I suggested a trial week where he stayed at mine for a week. It’s lasted 3 days 😱

He arrived on Friday night, by Saturday I’d lost count of how many times I’d told him about the coffee jar. Numerous times I told him to take his shoes off, he left wet towel on the bathroom floor on Saturday night and I snapped, we had a falling out where he accused me of being “OCD” about stuff. I I explained that this is my house and I won’t apologise for the way I keep it clean and tidy. We moved on.

Last night I went into the bathroom to see he’d left the wet towel on the floor, a pile of clothes AND his shoes meaning he had walked upstairs in his shoes. I just lost it, opened the bathroom window and chucked all his stuff out of it. When I went downstairs I informed him that everything he left in the bathroom is now in the garden. He went ape shit saying I was a psyco and I totally lost it and screamed at him to get the fuck out of my house and take all his shit with him. When he left I saw that he’d deliberately moved the coffee jar to the other side of the kitchen.

Since then he’s messaged me multiple times apologising saying he just needs to get used to how I work but I’m thinking this is just not going to work is it? How can you come back from that?