Is this neglect ?

[Rainbowfish1]

I'm really worried about my niece , age. 4, and don't know if I'm overthinking.
My brother got her mum pregnant after a short relationship, they split shortly after niece was born, he pays maintenance regularly via the CMS but apart from that has little day to day involvement, ( yes I know, DB' s a dick). He's 45 and nieces mum is 25.

-My niece is meant to go to nursery 1-6, 2 afternoons a week during term time, ( nursery stretches funding so this includes holidays). My friend works there and says she's always absent , misses at least one session a fortnight, often more, ( obviously nursery can't enforce attendance as nursery is not legally compulsory). When she is in , session starts at 13:00, but frequently not dropped till 13.30/ 13.45 etc.

• When she's not at nursery, ( and she rarely is !) they go nowhere. Literally nowhere. Nursery is Tuesday and Friday, and between they don't go out at all. Absolutely lovely shared garden and play area in their block of flats but don't go there. They don't leave the house for days on end. Sister in law is addicted to gaming etc and basically happy to stay in.
• Sister-in-law doesn't brush her teeth as "niece doesn't like it ", what 4 year old likes having their teeth brushed...
• Niece is only dressed on nursery days, ( where she does seem to dress her appropriately), she stays in her PJs for days on end otherwise. Whenever I visit on a non nursery day , niece is in her pyjamas, even at 2/3pm. Sister-in-law says what's the point in dressing niece if they are not going out.
• Sister in law is very overweight, basically live off take aways each night, ( only healthy meal she gets is the dinner 2 x a week at nursery).
• The flat is filthy. Five cats in a two bed flat , stinks of cat urine whenever I go round, litter trays always overflowing. Extremely cluttered and no space for niece to play.
• Sister-in-law smokes weed daily, ( she says only when niece is in bed ), but the whole flat stinks of it.

I know the simple answer is to report to soical, but I'm worried they won't do anything and it will just end up withe and my parents being cut off
Does this cross the line to reportable neglect?

report

Speak to the safeguarding lead at the nursery .

You need to report this OP.

i would report, you should be able to do this anonymously. I would also contact the police and ask them to do a welfare check.

The mother needs suppiort maybe.
The child needs to be out of there some of the time can she spend some days nights with you?
Does your brother want to step up?

What you've described is clearly neglect. Please report it for the sake of your little niece.

How on earth do you know what she is feeding her child every single day? And what on earth has the mother’s body size got to do with it?!?
Your friend could be fired for telling you that confidential information.

Leave the poor mother alone

Just to add I have raised with DB, he doesn't care, he just rants about how the CMS "take £300.00 a month from me to pay for that fat slobs take aways"...he last saw niece at Xmas.

I would also report. The drug use and dirty, unhygienic, conditions are not ok.

It was the weed smoking that would worry me.

Your brother sounds delightful and as neglectful as the mother. Poor child.

Can you not help? Have your neice a couple of days a week?

@Rainbowfish1 this is very sad to hear.
How is your niece? Her development, communication etc?

Oh and whilst I obviously don’t agree with not cleaning teeth, rarely leaving the house and it being “filthy” (if that’s actually accurate and not hyperbole on your part), there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wearing pyjamas when inside the house! It’s much more comfortable, saves unnecessary wear on clothing and as long as they’re clean and frequently changed then why is that an issue????

Between us, my parents and I visit at least 1 X a week to see niece , and the piles of take away containers are evident.
I absolutely agree that niece's mum's body shape is irrelevant, the issue is niece is starting to put on weight too.

Yes it’s neglect it started off not too bad but got worse and worse

Horrible neglect. Report.

Completely agree and won't come as any suprise to hear he also has a 14 year old he rarely sees as well. I think he's a crap Dad to both children, ( 14 year old thriving without him though).

Have you annd your parents offered to help mum? Take niece for a night a week and a day out for some stimulation and exercise?

That poor sweet child. Please report. She deserves kindness and a clean, jolly, happy home with stimulation and love, not neglect and spliffs.

That's partly why I'm posting here , to gain perspective. I personally dress in casual clothes for the day even if ill ....but as you're saying, that part doesn't sound too bad.

If what OP is saying is true the mother needs help and so does the neice.

Also the house really is filthy. It reeks of cat urine. I have offered to take 2 of the cats in as 5 is obviously way too much but Mum declined as she loves her cats. The smell of cat urine and weed is genuinely very overwhelming.

I would report it and also gently offer to help her with making the flat clean and tidy. Your brother sounds like a twat. Your niece will appreciate your kindness so focus on that.