1.  Light Sleep

2.  Light Lunch

3.  Light Work

Son 2 aged 13m’s second time laid straight down in the cot instead of snuggling himself to sleep next to me on the double bed.   I worked late last night “Don’t wake Son 2 when you come up,” said The Man.  He went up.  WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH.  Did I a) quietly go up to Son 2’s room and spend 30 minutes soothing him, and then come back and return to my work.  Or b) dart up to our room leaving Son 2 wailing, and dance round pointing at The Man singing “Who Let The Dogs Out?  So The Man did the 6am duty today.  And I had a lie in till gone 7.

We went to The Beach to see some friends, who were Swimming In The Sea. I said I’d do it next week.  Son 1 aged 4y 1m ran round a bit with the children, I spread out a rug on the sand for Son 2 who  crawled off it at speed and never went back.  They were both knackered, and passed out in the car as we drove off.  So we went to a seaside restaurant where we could park the car, sit outside and see the boys asleep in their seats.  We had coffee.  They stayed asleep.  I read the Independent.  The Man read the local paper. The temperature dropped.  The wind got up.  We’d missed breakfast, so we ordered Tapas.  It took forever to come.   Son 2 woke up and ate some of The Man’s salmon and chips. 

When we got back home Son 1 had missed lunch and was still tired.  Son 2 hadn’t eaten enough and refused to have an afternoon sleep.  So they were Very Hard Work Indeed.  I have worked out since she started doing 4 days a week that the difference between me and Wonder Nanny is that if Going Out will disrupt meals or sleeps she just doesn’t do it.  Whereas off we always jolly well go.  ”Why do they behave so perfectly for her, and melt down for me?” I ask.  We stuffed sausages and mash in them at half past four and put them to bed early.   Son 2 straight into the cot.  I wanted to blog, so  The Man’s gone up ahead of me.  WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

1.  Early reading

2.  Flashing Blue Lights

3. Down In The Cot

Son 2 aged 13m started off in his cot but wailed long and loud at some time post-midnight.  I had taken a whacking slug of Night Nurse so The Man went to the rescue.  In the morning we were all up late. I felt a lot better this morning… some clear blue water now between me and death’s door.  Son 2’s started having an opinion on which books we should do in the morning.  Today’s favourite was the little Word book… pictures of things to do with The Park, The Beach, The Farm, Wild Animals etc.  I think he’s using it and other similar books like dictionaries.  He sits very still staring at the pictures and listening to the words.  And then at the end flips the pages back to his favourite ones.

In the car, Son 1 aged 4y 1m played with his flashing blue light sabre from last night.  He was late for Nursery, and clung and clung.  He wants Son 2 to go to Nursery with him.  He wants to stay at home with Wonder Nanny and Son 2.  Oh boy.    I really do think he’d be bored at home, but maybe the New Nursery is just too far and too school-like.  The Office was, as usual, like stepping inside a mad computer game where for every one thing you successfully swat, three more leer up laughing.  For nine hours.  I staggered out, got into the car and drove home, remembering this time to put my headlights on.  A blue flashing light followed me for many miles.  Till I realised Son 1’s light sabre had bumped itself on in the rear passenger footwell.  

The Tumble Drier man came while I was at The Office.  It’s mended, hooray.  And Wonder Nanny made muffins and minestrone soup while Son 2 was sleeping.   Son 2 was being bathed when I got back.  Son 1 was playing with a Pirate spotting book I bought from an Usbourne woman’s stall.  I cuddled Son 2, sang him his lullaby, gave him his milk and PUT HIM DOWN IN HIS COT hooray hooray.  Much excitement.  I can’t remember the last time I put him to sleep in his cot - not since well before I stopped feeding him.  I gave up at the point where I just couldn’t feed him to sleep any more, so it must be a couple of months.  He woke up once just as I’d finished with Son 1, and he yelled and yelled so I had to start again with him.  But he’s been sleeping there quietly so far for the rest of the evening so far…

1.  Stirrings

2.  Back to School

3.  Sprint Finish

It was hell getting Son 2 aged 13m down in the cot last night - took more than half an hour - but he stayed in till nearly 6am, which I am counting as a second night sleeping through.  If he makes it tonight I will start seeing if I can put him down in the cot, rather than leaving him lying on a double bed with pillows either side.  He was hungry and he was thirsty.  A clear, definite “Na na” Which he ate in less than five minutes once we were downstairs.  He was brilliant for his books this morning, sitting still for The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Well most of it.  As soon as the pages you can stick your fingers in had gone, he was off.  His favourite is still the animals book.  He can now fling his arm up for the elephant, make fish mouth noises and roar like a lion.  There is a little confusion between the noises for a duck’s quack quack and a crocodile’s snap-snap but it’s easily done.  He is also definitely yeh yeh ing, and nnnnnn ing. And Ma Ma has returned, but with considerably more “SORT ME OUT NOW” welly.

We were a bit worried about Son 1 aged 4 y 1m going back to Nursery, because with his two-week half term and his ear infection it’s been three weeks.  He was ok.  He made me park way up the entrance road, and we arrived just as the children were sitting down for the register.  He plonked himself down on the floor and gazed up at the teacher as if I wasn’t there.  Wonder Nanny picked him up and said the teacher had said he’d been very tired in the afternoon.  Again, it’s the playground.  Too noisy.   

Other good things: my computer came back from the mender’s, which will make The Office a bit easier, because I can work in the evenings again, hooray hooray.  We have a number for a chiropodist for The Man’s sore feet.   Wonder Nanny has sent off the registration form for Ofsted.  We’ve accepted a party invitation for Son 1.  “That’s good news, isn’t it Mummy?”  He’s getting the hang of this.  And Son 2 stole the show.  As he was exhausted, I held him under his armpits to let him practise walking - one of his favourite things, and I thought if he did his usual hold-on-to-my-fingers-walk he’d stumble and get fed up.  When he felt the extra support he just sprinted.  Up and down the kitchen like Forest Gump, with me having to do a running, bent-over waddle to keep up with him.  He chortled and squealed and laughed and laughed.  So did Son 1.  I knew we were in for it when he finally walks… it never occurred to me that it will in fact be much worse when he can RUUUUUUUUUUNNNNN.

1. Organic Matter
2. Smile and Wave
3. Vegetable Matter
Son 2 aged 13m woke up in his cot at 0545. Hooray hooray. The Man was Tired, so I took the boys swimming one after another. Son 2 was so excited that in the changing room he sat by the cubicle door and bounced up and down. We sat in the baby pool in the Shallow End. There was Matter in the water. I checked Son 2’s swim nappy. It wasn’t his. I looked around. More Matter. I took Son 2 over to the lifeguard, stepping past a two inch turd lying at the bottom of the pool. “There is poo in the pool,” I told the lifeguard. “Where?” he said. “There,” I said. “And there, and there and there.” Son 2 was so keen to swim that I took him up to the Deep End where some Friends were swimming. Nothing sinister there. I watched the lifeguard go from the Shallow End to talk to his colleague at the Deep End. They changed seats. Nothing happened. 30 minutes later, a net came out. Stuff was removed from the Shallow End, many times. The net was emptied into a fire bucket. Then the fire door was opened, and the contents of the bucket were tipped onto the grass outside. As our Friend said: “Isn’t it lucky they shut the cafe?”

I took Son 2 back at the end of the session, and picked up Son 1 aged 4y 1m. At the pool, the wave machine was on, and I gave him a surfboard. He pulled himself on it and kicked and paddled effortlessly to the Deep End, where he joyfully bounced up and down on the biggest waves. Then he paddled himself over to the Tunnel, turned himself round and kicked himself backwards all the way along. Every time I tried to touch the board he pushed me off. “I can’t believe my eyes,” I said. “Where did you learn how to do all this?” “At my Nursery,” he said.

“But can he swim?” said The Man, back home. “No idea,” I said. I have taken Son 1 to swimming lessons since he did dunk-the-babies when he was about three months old. He hated going under water from the first immersion and has never budged his opinion. So now I never comment, never enquire, never try and make him do anything. The boys played, and I finished off the roast chicken dinner. I didn’t get Son 2’s on his highchair in time to avert major ice-cap melting tantrum. He couldn’t do it. Son 1 however, transformed himself into a Perfect Child. He rejected the courgettes and parsnips, but ate whacking great chunks of cauliflower and shovelfuls of leeks. He got his toy dustpan and brush and cleared up all the food Son 2 had flung overboard. Then, when I at last got near my meal, he sat on my knee and ate my cauliflower and leeks too. Apparently if you eat more vegetables after your pudding you have to have another pudding. We settled on a Scooby Doo Ice Pop.

1.  Night 2

2.  School homework

3.  Moment captured

4.  Swimming

Son 2 aged 13m stayed in the cot overnight again, Wa-hay.  He struggled going to sleep, I moved him into it when I went to bed… he woke at 0430.  I woke, looked at the clock, decided he’d done well and I’d go down to him, and then he was crying again and it was 0630. 

The tiny school 3 miles away that I like for Son 1 has just had an Outstanding Ofsted.   Disaster.  I found it when it was only Good, hands off.  So I went for a coffee with a friend’s friend, an expert in schools admissions.  Take The Man to see it, make sure the Head knows it’s your first choice and then just keep in touch so you find out before close of submissions if it’s oversubscribed and you’d be wasting your time trying.  She sold me on the one her children go to as our second choice, and we could get Son 1 in there. We’re lucky, because we can choose any school in The Town and Son 1’s is a low birthrate year.  He can go anywhere.  If I just can get that little village school out of my system…

Son 2 is getting good at standing.  He’s got a bit of control, and can balance and look at something he’s doing at the same time.  And then, after lunch… he stood, he looked, and he wobbled forward.  And his little feet stumbled forward, left right left right, until he sat down on his big fat nappy bottom.  The crowd (me, Wonder Nanny, Son 1) went wild and clapped and cheered.  “Well done Son 2!” “Do it again, do it again!”  Son 2 looked as if he’d like to oblige, but hadn’t the faintest idea what he’d done to get such a reaction.  And now I know why I blog diligently.  I’ve no idea of the exact moment Son 1 took his first steps - he was probably at nursery.

A Four Good Things day.  We took the boys swimming, and it was lovely.  Son 1 was mad with excitement, playing pirates the whole time, forcing himself between me and Son 2 whenever he thought we were enjoying ourselves without  him.  Son 2 loves the water.  We came back and they were both exhausted.  Tea was early, getting them to bed was early… Son 2 passed out within minutes and hasn’t stirred this evening.  I was downstairs at 1815… and Wonder Nanny had done all the clearing up.  Wa-hay.