Bugger Off
Wednesday, June 17th, 20091. Cold Remedy
2. Cold Symptoms
3. Cold Water
Feeling very rough today, so I didn’t go into The Office. I had a pile of work to do at home, and planned to get a kip in the afternoon while Wonder Nanny took the boys out. Son 2 aged 21m woke, and we did his books session. Son 1 aged 4y 8m joined us. i put the boys in front of the telly a few minutes before Wonder Nanny was due, and went upstairs for a Tea Tree bath. Not enough hot water. Strange, because we usually only have hot water problems if we’ve had a set of back-to-back showers.
Wonder Nanny had arranged to go to a playground to see her Nanny friend with the two little boys she looks after. She made a picnic and off the three of them went. For the first time ever, I was glad to see them go. I worked through the morning, and then walked into The Town for a break. Big mistake. I wasn’t up to it and didn’t really recover. I had lunch and went to bed. I was woken at 3.45pm by a little face beside me: “Hello sweetie, are you all right?”
Wonder Nanny gave the boys their tea and left. And again, they went loopy. I couldn’t really cope. I tried washing a beaker for Son 2’s bedtime milk. No hot water. This meant Completely No Hot Water. I rang The Man, who, as this is a Positive Blog, I shall described as Not Very Much Help. i rang a plumber who can’t come till Thursday morning. I boiled a kettle. In my 70s childhood our council house had no central heating and no hot water. Boiling a kettle always marked the start of wash time. Mind you, even then we had an immersion heater. I have no idea where ours is, and The Man can’t remember. I washed the boys one at a time in the bathroom sink, Son 2 first. By the time I came to dry Son 1, I’d had enough. No hot water, flu-stricken, single mother, and two rowdy, noisy, out-of-control boys. Son 1 bounced and swirled as I tried to dry him. “Son 1 will you - ” “- Bugger off!” he said, laughing madly, his eyes dancing. He detected my I think I’ll ignore this thought. “Bugger off, bugger off, bugger off!” “I don’t know where you’ve got that disgusting language,” I said. “Bugger off, bugger off, bugger off,” he said, pointing both fingers at me. ”Mummy, do you want me to Bugger Off?” he giggled. No. But I do want you to shut the f*** up. I think that thought stayed in my head. I suppose I will find out at bath time tomorrow.

