blooming disney princesses

[flabbyapronbelly]

Grrrr
Have until now managed to avoid them but my dd has just had her 4th bday. She had quite a large party and so she has been given loads of tat, including lots of Disney Princess bits.
Have just sat down to read a little library of the princess books. Am quite shocked and can't help but think that they are part the route down which an unhealthy body image lies. They all have ridiculously proportioned bodies and not to mention their obsessions with beautiful dresses, sparkly things, being beautiful, having a handsome boyfriend. All so inane. I know quite a lot of dds friends are obsessed by them, but I worry about the influence it is having on them long term.
I know that this kind of thing has been written about loads before on mn but just wanted to vent as think most people I know in rl would think I'm a loon if I tried to talk to them about it!

[moondog]

I think the best thing is not to freak and let your daughter see them as forbidden fruit. I just act neutral about stuff like this-neither enthusing wildly nor sucking teeth.

I'm not a fan of American kids' films but I did watch one of the Shrek films with them last night andwas gratified to see a bunch of princesses rescuing the blokes and generally kicking ass.

[Differentfrom]

Someone bought my 2 year old dd a tiara, jewellery set for her birthday. Horrified at her joy, we were later delighted when she put the tiara around her neck and wandered around being a 'doctor' with the tiara as a stethoscope! However, she was only two and, if her preference for pink clothes despite our neutrality continues, we too may have a misguided princess on our hands... Know what you mean about other people thinking you're a loon, sadly.

[Finbar]

You could always read her 'Princess Smartypants' as an antidote - I was delighted to find a book that reversed the pink effect!

[SethStarkaddersMum]

you are not a loon. You are definitely not being unreasonable!!!!!

My strategy is to make sure I fill the house with lots of better stuff and generally to not have anything to do with the Disney shite. It's not forbidden but she knows I think it's crap. She has plenty given to her by friends/MIL but if she wants me to read her a story it's not going to be one of those!

[Besom]

Someone bought my dd a Disney fairies thing and it was even worse! They've all got large pointy boobs and are drawn in what I can only describe as porn poses (an exageration, but they are posed in a sexualised way, sort of like Betty Grable or Marylin Monroe poses). It went straight in the bin.

[biddyofsuburbia]

It is hard to avoid all this isn't it. DD is 3 and has her fair share of tat from well meaning friends and family. I think you will be OK if you make sure that she's exposed to plenty of other ideas as well where there are strong female role models. A halfway house might be the Angelina books - although in truth I find these just as irritating but at least she's a 'strong' character in some respects and it's not just about clothes and handsome princes.

[thumbwitch]

I know what you mean and for this reason (among others) was relieved when DC1 turned out to be a boy. I am pretty anti-pink and all it stands for as well, and strongly believe that all "Fairy Tales" with Happy Ever After endings should come with Govt Health Warnings. Balancing out the pink with lots of other stuff should help - George's Marvellous Medicine type books (well, most of Roald Dahl tbh) and general non-pink toys and activities to give a more rounded view on life.

You can always try laughing at the Disney Princesses and saying - look how silly they are, all they think about is clothes and boys, they'd never get on in life these days with that attitude!
Although of course some do...

[BelleDameSansMerci]

I loathe the Disney princess thing. I went to Disneyland/world (whatever) in Paris with some friends and their children before I had DD. At the Princess Parade I said rather more loudly than I thought "Oh yes, teach another generation of girls to have totally unrealistic expectations and that their lives are nothing until the Prince shows up." I do really believe this though. I think the whole thing is an anachronism.

My DD also knows I'm not keen on the princess thing but I'm fairly neutral about it to her. I try to teach her that they are just stories and that they don't reflect real life. DD is 2.7 however so I'm not sure how much she actually takes in!

While watching the Chipmunks sequel (groan), there is a scene where a group of high school girls are chatting with the chipmunks. A group of boys come up and say "private conference" and all the girls get up and leave the table to enable the boys to talk. WTF? Why couldn't the boys and chipmunks have gone to another table? I know that seems a bit over-analytical but it just sent the message that the boys were more "important" and in-charge to me. I didn't react well to that and said "Well, how rude." Now, every time it comes on, DD says "that's very rude". I hope this will sink in.

[MillyR]

I think that the Disney fairies film is actually quite positive. Tinkerbell is a 'tinker' fairy, and is valued for her ability to make, mend and create a wide range of items, including many that are traditionally masculine forms of technology.

Although her appearance is odd, and she was originally based on Marilyn Monroe.

The Disney Princess phase is very shortlived, although I know it seems hellish and all-consuming if you have a daughter between the ages of about 4 and 6.

[Itsjustafleshwound]

I think the princesses could be lumped along with all the other tripe that little girls seem to like - Princess Poppy, Bratz, Barbie ..

What is the antedote (reading, TV, film) for all this??

[Ryoko]

Get her a book of the Brothers Grimm and read her some proper fairy tales.

Where all this happy ever after stuff comes from I don't know, even Disney wasn't like that when he was alive he stuck to the fairy stories with no sugar coating.

I still don't know how Aladdin suddenly ended up in the middle east

[phokoje]

am totally with you on the chipmunks sequel tho! i also though that particular scene was very bad. and i dont think i am over analytical. i sincerely hope that if a group of boys was ever so dismissive to DD that she would view it as the appalling behaviour it is, and to do that, she needs me to react to stuff like that in a negative way (like your 'how rude!'BDSM)

[azazello]

I sympathise. I have a nearly 3yo DD who goes to playgroup so has decided that she likes disney princesses and pink is her favourite colour.

With the pink thing we are making it very clear that she might like pink but mummy likes blue best, daddy likes green, granny likes orange etc. My heart did sink when my grandma gave DD a whole set of the books of the film of the little mermaid etc... at the moment the mermaid is rescuing the prince because she is a doctor and that is what drs do.

[sweetkitty]

Yes they are very annoying but I think what a 3yo likes is completely different to a 15yo IYSWIM. I tell 5yo DD1 that the stories are fairytales and all make believe anyway.

I have one DD who loves Disney Princesses and another who loves snakes and dinosaurs, oh and a little one that loves Waybaloo

[MaryBS]

My 10yo is a former Disney Princess who is now into Star Wars and Dr Who. It DOES pass!

[Lutyens]

Ryoko, Alladin IS a middle eastern folk tale. The name Alladin is pronounced Allah-dheen and means "gift of Allah"

Disney got the location right but gave all the characters American accents and gave the princess an Asian name (Jasmine isn't Middle Eastern - the correct equivalent is Yasmeen)

[thumbwitch]

Ryoko - see the wiki page on Aladdin - I also thought it was about a Chinese boy, which the original story was, even though it was one of the 1001 Arabian Nights stories. So DIsney did kind of bugger it about, but then they started doing that. The Little Mermaid is the most annoying one, imo - nothing wrong with the original ending except that it doesn't allow for sequels!

[annoyingdevil]

Yes, that chipmunks movie was my DD's first ever cinema trip. I was appalled by that scene

[ProfessorLaytonIsMyLoveSlave]

Mulan is not so bad, Belle in Beauty and the Beast is at least obsessed by books rather than sparkly things, and in The Princess and the Frog they've specifically tried to cancel some of the most frequent criticisms.

But in general I entirely sympathise.

[YokoUhOh]

I have a relative whose job it is to 'be' a Disney Princess at little girls' parties She gets paid to turn up and pretend to be Cinderella (I presume it's not a job you could do if you were overweight or facially challenged; it helps that she looks like a Disney Princess). Her mum used to be a staunch feminist, not sure that she is now her (grown up) children worship at the altar of Disney

[HerrenaHandbasket]

Interesting info about Aladdin, I never knew that!

Disney princesses are the work of evil. I have two DSs and am sworn by my principles to get them tiaras and dresses and such should they request them. They are very small so haven't done so yet, thank goodness!

[TheDoctrineOfSnatch]

Roald Dahl books are of their time - the police are men etc.

Try amightygirl.com for book and film recommendations.

[Catmint]

The paper bag princess is a good antidote book.

And the princess knight.

I agree with the pp that princess smarty pants is also good.

My dd is now 6 and has seen and enjoyed a few Disney princess films. She likes dressing up as a princess.

We did / do allow princess dresses, and even a bride dress that she wanted, but we always choose generic ones. They are much nicer and break the Disney connection a bit.

Our policy has been to provide princess stuff when asked but to actively offer a range of other role models.

Dd is currently obsessed with power rangers, so basically we have substituted one corporate cynical marketing exercise for another. However, there is less princessification, so I am moderately happy.

Good alternative films are Kiki's delivery service or My Neighbour Totoro. Dd recommends princess mononoke. All these films are by studio Ghibli.