Am I just not a good enough feminist or something?

[SolidGoldBrass]

I don't want to make light of other people's suffering and I'm certainly not doubting the horrible online abuse other women suffer. But it's not happening to me and I don't know why.
I have a blog and a twitter account. I shout about feminism on both of them. And I actually quite want some trolls to come and have a go, because I am really quite mean and would like to stamp on their little heads and make them think again about bullying women. But... nothing. I got one loopy anti-semite (even though I'm not actually Jewish) who ran away after one good slap.

What am I doing wrong?

[CaptChaos]

Commenting on feministfrequency is pretty much guaranteed to get your some frothing weirdo telling you you're completely wrong and that he's allowed to watch women getting raped in virtual worlds?

[MardyBra]

I suspect you are a fine feminist.

I just imagine you're not getting enough traffic to your blog.

[chibi]

on twitter you will tend to get more abuse if your avi is identifiably female, especially if you are a woman of colour

you will be found by trolls doing keyword searches, so it depends on what you hashtag, who you retweet, who you interact with

[MardyBra]

Maybe the word is out not to mess with you.

[CaptChaos]

Maybe the word is out not to mess with you.

This is also a possibility.

[SolidGoldBrass]

Well, I have been known to retweet Laurie Penny, Louise Pennington and Caitlin Moran... Where's this feminist frequency then? I quite fancy a fight.

[EBearhug]

I would have said the same, except yesterday, I got called a feminista and told I was alienating people who supported women.

(I asked how having girlie calendars and making sexist comments counted as being respectful to women and treating them as equals, as he claimed he was in the '70s. Still, at least I know what to say now, so I can avoid being one of those feminist types he doesn't approve of, which as far as I can tell is the sort who doesn't actually want to be treated equally, or not a feminist. It's quite sweet, the way they follow the script...)

I'm surprised you don't get them on twitter, though. Have you got many followers?

[MrsMcNameChange]

I for one, would appreciate a tweet thread without male dickheadedness. Please feel free to share, I'm sure we can have your wall overrun in penis-led-dickheadedness momentarily...

[WhatWitchcraftIsThis]

I think the feminists who are generally hassled most are anti prostitution and sex work. I've never read your blog but based on MN posts I'd assume that's not going to factor heavily in it.

[CKDexterHaven]

Hmm, if only those other feminists getting death and rape threats and having their families threatened and being forced to move house were stronger and sassier and, dare I say it, feistier, they would relish the abuse they were getting because it would give them the chance to slap misogynists down and prove how strong and sassy and feisty they are. If only men would threaten to rape me to death and insert implements into my corpse because I'm not a whinger and a wimp, I'm strong and sassy and feisty and my individual strength and sassiness and feistiness would make misogynistic online abuse disappear. If only more women turned to liberal feminism and had a bit of attitude adjustment about misogyny and became more strong and sassy and feisty then nothing would actually be solved at a systemic level but we'd feel less wimpy and moany and boring about it.

Loads of the women I follow on social media have had to close their accounts recently due to abuse. I seriously doubt you would want the kind of attacks directed at high-profile women coming our way no matter how strong you are. Would you wish yourself into an abusive relationship because you as an individual are strong and would enjoy giving a misogynistic partner a good whack to put him straight?

I'm not a fan of liberal feminism but 'rape-threat envy' is a new one on me. I know the OP is meant to be a bit flippant but there is an implication that the solution to online abuse lies in the way women deal with it and strong women can shrug it off and slap these men down while the women who cave into it are weak and a bit miseryguts for not loving the opportunity for a fist-fight.

It would be great if women could just talk online, share ideas and challenge misogyny without having to waste time either going into hiding or having to fight off misogynists. It would be great not having the diversions at all.

[SolidGoldBrass]

It would be great if women didn't have to deal with misogynistic attacks online, certainly. (And, BTW, the two names who first spring to mind, Anita Sarkeesian and Caroline Criado-Perez, were not particularly focussed on opposing sex work when they began to get attacked).

However, I genuinely think that it makes things better, not worse, the more women who use social media and refuse to shut up. We're the majority of the human race, after all - and what I don't much like is a mindset I have seen, from time to time, that women can't use the internet because of all the nasty trolls, and that we should shut up and run away.

[Stealthpolarbear]

Oh get back to your kitchen op. shouldn't you be cooking dinner?

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

Well, you and me both, SGB! I've got close to 25,000 views on my blog since I started it and the worst I've had is mild disagreement.

Clearly our only option is to develop a bitter feud and argue it out across twitter.

Seriously, though - I don't know about you, but I reckon the reason I don't get as much flack as some women is there's a perception that nice, white women who appear to enjoy heterosex (and especially nice white women like me, who're also all eddicated and shit) are probably not very threatening.

[AskBasil]

But Caroline Criada Perez is a naice white educated woman. ~And her cause was so respectable and unthreatening - putting Jane Austen on a bank note.

[AskBasil]

Sorry Criado even

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

I know, basil.

I'm not saying it's perfect protection, just suggesting those things might be reasons SGB's blog hasn't got waves of aggressive wankers on it. Yet. Mary Beard is also a naice educated woman, and gets bucketloads of crap. I'm sure the fact CCP is young and blonde and pretty gets up some misogynists' noses, too.

[AskBasil]

Yes they hate young pretty women because they don't have access to them and they hate old women because they don't give them boners.

Nobs

[TunipTheUnconquerable]

CCP and MB were both on tv.
If several million people are aware of you there's a much greater chance there'll be arseholes who want to get into a fight with you, than if a few thousand people hear what you're saying.
If you're mainly just blogging and tweeting then most of your audience is self-selecting. Once you start appearing in mainstream media that's no longer the case.

[SolidGoldBrass]

I suppose maybe what I'm thinking is that it's important for women to say to other women: actually the Internet is not that scary. It won't necessarily bite you. Because along with the justifiable outrage that some women are being horribly attacked online goes this idea that women shouldn't risk bothering their pretty little heads, because if we don't sit back, shut up, cover up, run away then All The Bad Things will happen.

[Blondieminx]

IME, sometimes it is the (bad) luck of the draw. For a few days post-CCP's banknote campaign (which I supported, including donating to the legal fees fund), I was targeted by tossers.

I argued back ...but what was really fecking awful was that the rape threats were then made against my daughter, too. She was 3 at the time. And that was fucking appalling.

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

tunip - but that's not entirely how it works, surely? Yes, if you go on TV and are very visible, you will get targeted. But many women are targeted anyway - so it's not even so simple a that people target visible women.

SGB - mmm, I get what you mean, but I think it is so much more of a lottery than that. IMO, ee need to say yes, it is scary. You could get flamed on MN and get upset. You might go on facebok and find your cousin is a horrible misogynist. Nowhere is 'safe' in absolute terms. But perhaps we can work out how to feel better when we get slated?

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

blondie, that's horrible.

[andiewithanie]

Have you tried writing/tweeting about any concerns you have about trans politics? The feministninja tumblr has some examples of the adorable comments you might expect to get.

[WhatWitchcraftIsThis]

god complete and utter bastards Blondie.

[Hakluyt]

IIRC you are a sex positive feminist, OP.

Thy are the sort of feminists men like best- so you're unlikely to get much hassle.............