What surname do your children have?

[AmberTheCat]

Following on from the 'Changing my name' thread, I'm interested in what surnames those of us who have children have chosen to give them, and why?

My children have my dp's surname. We're not married, and I felt that people would be more likely to assume that they were my children, and question whether they were his, if they had my name. Not a particularly feminist argument, but one that felt important to me (dp didn't really mind either way).

[Hakluyt]

"We're not married, and I felt that people would be more likely to assume that they were my children, and question whether they were his, if they had my name"

Why would it matter what they thought? Not intending to be snippy- but this is one of the many arguments around this issue that I don't understand.

We're not married, and our children are hyphenated. They would have been even if we were married.

[CMOTDibbler]

We're married, and ds is myname-hisname.

[NigellasDealer]

mine got both with mine first - as their dad's name is unpronouncable to your average brit and he does not bother with them anyway, his has been dropped off with time. what a shame.

[piratecat]

mine has his (ex's) name, we were married. he's since changed his name to his wife's name.

Have thought about changing my name, but dd doesn't want to be different to me, nor does she really want his name anymore.

[5madthings]

Not married and madthings have both surnames hyphenated, even if we were married they would still have both surnames and if we ever get married I won't change my surname.

[FragileBrittleStar]

Mine has DP's. Mine is difficult to pronounce/spell/gives rise to teasing. it is foreign and would give DS a name of which he is only a 1/4 of that nationality- also arguably he should have the male version of the name rather than the female so would end up with a different name to either of us.
DP's is a simple english name.
Plus DP cared- i didn't (he expected me to want to use my name and was going to go along with it unhappily) - it just doesn't bother me

[JuniDD]

Same as 5madthings though the child isn't here yet. My partner's family are all assuming it'll be his surname, which is quite funny.

People like to get quite het up about "but what will the children do when they get married". It's hardly any of my business! I also expect they will drop one name as they go along, I'm totally fine with that but want to start with both and mine in particular as I'll be doing all the primary caring stuff.

[TheHoneyBadger]

my son has my name. i was not married and there's no way i'd give him a name other than my own.

[HorizontalRunningOnly]

My DS has his dads name, we weren't married but engaged. Now separated so me and my son have different names. I wish id thought more about it but I thought we would get married in a year or two and then all have the same name. I don't really like having a different name now and in the future and other children I have will be different surnames to my son. Have thought of asking his dad of we can change and hypenate his surname especially as his surname is a boys name so could be moved to be ds second middle name if that makes sense.

[Yama]

Eldest has my name. Youngest has dh's name. Fair's fair. We are very much a family unit.

I'm not bothered if teachers do not realise they are siblings. They are individuals and I've never met a teacher who would discriminate anyway.

[JustLikeHoney]

Not married and our children have both our names. I could not conceive of my children having a different name to me. It never occurred to me for them to have my partner's name solely. He felt the same so we made the (somewhat uncomfortable) compromise of hyphenating.

I don't particularly like my last name or his. If he had a last name that I though really beautiful I may have decided differently.

[almondcakes]

We are married. The DCs have my name. I didn't realise this was unusual. Maybe it is.

[NigellasDealer]

of course you know that is unusual almondcakes

[MontyGlee]

DS has my name as the father and I are not together. I'm already double-barreled with both of my parents' surnames. It's all ok now, but I do wonder how the next generation will deal with this issue. Quadruple-barreling?

It does seem that hyphenating is a political solution and not a very practical one.

[fledermaus]

Not married, children have my name.

[almondcakes]

I knew that a lot of people got married and everybody including the mother had the father's name. I did not realise that among couples who were not married or ones where they are but keep their own names, that the children were named after the father.

I was pretty young when I had children, and I did not put much thought into it. They just had my name because I am their mother. It seemed the obvious thing to do.

[Fideliney]

Divorced, remarried. My name.

[peggyundercrackers]

our dd has DPs surname - if we marry we would all have the same name then - cant be doing with this hyphenated nonsense

[DramaAlpaca]

I am married. I decided to take DH's name because I preferred his to mine. The children have DH's name.

I like that all five of us share the same surname as a family unit. I never even considered giving them my name or both names.

[Eminybob]

A name is just a name. My baby will have dp's surname, we are not married but very much a family and will probably get married at some point.
I get referred to as mrs dp's name most of the time anyway, which is fine by me.

[eurochick]

We're about to have our first. The name will be his name- my name. It comes out as a bit of a mouthful but it's important to me that the child has both.

[beccajoh]

Their surname is DH's, but they have my name as a second middle name. His name is easier to spell whereas mine is constantly mispronounced and mis-spelled.

[threeolivemartini]

Mine have DH's name. We couldn't really hyphenate as our surnames are quite similar so would just sound odd.

My thinking at the time was that everyone had seen me the size of a whale, so they knew they were my children. Obviously I wasn't thinking past the baby stage.
I am fine with this though , and though DH has never questioned me not changing my name (he knew since we met that that would be the case), I think he likes the DC having his surname. We haven't had any problems with having a different name yet.

I did get a lecture from the registrar that I didn't have to give DC my husband's name though. I told her I was aware of that but it was a mutual decision. I don't think she was impressed.

[McFox]

We're married and our ds has my dh's surname simply because it sounds way better. We couldn't double barrel our surnames because it would be ludicrous. I was happy with this decision before he was born, but don't know if I am now. I still don't want to change my name though. It's a tough decision.

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

They have DH's surname, for the same reason as the OP. I have my own surname (we were married pre DCs). I dislike hyphenated names and ours really wouldn't have sounded good together. We could have added mine as a middle name, but it would still have been a real mouthful and I didn't feel all that strongly about it.

No, it doesn't really matter what people think, but I didn't feel strongly about them having mine and DH did want them having his. Not a feminist decision perhaps, but one that suits us.