Not directly a feminist issue (though can easily be made one), but I wanted to ask people who are prepared to think about things.
I usually OVERthink things, so you may bring me some needed perspective.
I'm disabled and talking of breaking up from DP. This will be personally disastrous for me. On the one hand, I'm not quite well enough to live fully independently. On the other, the new benefits system keeps trying to designate me fit to work, then leaving me adrift in appeals and paperwork for months. And I have a GP who thinks M.E./CFS is Munchausens. Great.
As you can imagine, I'm kinda staring down the barrel a bit at the moment.
DP has been very generous in saying don't move out until I'm ready. But I'll have to move out at some point to allow him to move on with his life and stop using him (which I hate myself for).
Last night a very old friend said that, if push came to shove, I could move in at theirs. When I got off the phone from thanking them, DP said, "And I thank Old Friend too, for looking after you."
I have spent the night furious. Probably unreasonably.
But it feels to me like DP is still pretending he is my rescuer, and in some weird sense owner, and that looking after me will be his responsibility even after I've left him, and that he is somehow subcontracting this care to Old Friend (who barely even knows him).
Just writing that is making me feel an idiot for not just accepting the generosity of both DP and Old Friend and being glad they both want to look out for me.
I am being an idiot, aren't I? I reemed DP out this morning about it - and as usual he agreed with every word I said, because I had said it. Arggh!
I know this isn't AIBU, but feel free to tell me IABU.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions
Tell me I'm overthinking this
7 replies
HandDivedRaspberries · 18/04/2013 11:11
OP posts:
quietlysuggests ·
18/04/2013 11:16
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.