From a feminist point of view...

[toymakerlady]

... what would you do if someone suggested you get these for their DD's 3rd birthday?

now, there are a number of reasons I am reluctant, including, not exclusively:

1. Plastic tat (quite frankly)
   
2. Disney branding
   
3. Made in a sweatshop somewhere in China
   
4. I wouldn't give them houseroom myself and DH actually shuddered when I showed him...
   

But also, I wondered about the whole message of "pretend high heels" for little girls. It's just not something I am comfortable with.

However, in my friend's house, everything is a shrine to Disney Princesses, and when I asked what I could get for her DD's birthday, this was her suggestion.

What can I say? My friend has obviously never thought of this, and I don't want to appear to judge her, or to upset her!

[buzzsore]

And £20 too.

[SybilBeddows]

I would get something else. AFAIC choosing presents means finding something that they would want and you would want to give them.

you want the best for her dd and you want to make her happy. 3yos aren't hard to buy for, there must be something out there that will tick both boxes.

[toymakerlady]

Yes Buzz and as you can probably guess from my username, I make hand made toys...

It's part of a "present syndicate" that has been set up so that in the group of mums, we each buy one present for one child, rather than 5 presents at £5 each. But yes, £20 of DH and my money on something neither of us would really condone... and we have a DD of the same age.

[wrongdecade]

does your daughter like stuff like that??

[unclefest]

what about a disney duvet set or something (although again it's probably made unethically) .

[toymakerlady]

not really, wrongdecade her favourite dressing up clothes are Daddy's safety boots and three hats (2 sunhats and her dad's woolly one) and today she has mostly been playing with a balloon and a calculator! Although she has just told me that she and her "baby" are ready to go shopping now.

[AuntieMonica]

surely the fact you make toys and are a woman is a feminist reason enough to give her something YOU'VE made?

[wrongdecade]

if its not her thing then maybe advise something else.

[Takver]

In the circs I would probably compromise. I wouldn't buy those (at all!) but I'd look for an alternative that is pretty and dressy-uppy. IME festivals, craft markets and the like are generally full of fairy wings/crowns/wands/little skirts etc made by the seller. I reckon you could probably find something ethically sound, genuinely nice and which would be likely to please your friend's child (and - probably more to the point - your friend).

Or alternatively you could just go for something completely different and hope she'll like it . . .

[toymakerlady]

hmm very true auntiemonica !
Sadly though, I think they would be disappointed. It's a bit of a tricky one. It's sort of like knitting, you "only knit gifts for people who knit"... I think it would be generally assumed I was trying to get out of spending the £20 budget!

[buzzsore]

They're tacky, their play-value is very limited and I think they'd be uncomfortable to boot. I'd look for a proper medieval princess outfit (not Disney) or something in preference as a sort of half-way house.

[toymakerlady]

but DH and I are right, aren't we, there is a feminist point to be made in not buying high heels for a 3 year old?

I could make a lot of dressing up things for £20, but I do think that they might not be very well received. DD has a purple, black and silver tutu like that, stewie. It goes really nicely with aforementioned safety boots!

[DontCallMePeanut]

See, I usually love Disney but those are horrible.

WRT the homemade gift, I'd be honoured if someone took time out of their schedule to make DS a toy as a gift. To me, there's more sentiment to it.

[DontCallMePeanut]

P.S. A white lie of "they were out of stock" won't hurt...

[toymakerlady]

peanut that was DH's suggestion!

eek I only have til the weekend!

[buzzsore]

I think because it's a present syndicate, the others might be miffed (despite it costing you in time/energy and materials of course). Unless they were creative types too. But you know the people involved, OP, so would be better placed to judge it.

[toymakerlady]

I love it stewie

Buzz has hit the nail on the head... although I was starting to work out what amazing creation I could come up with for £20 on materials!