He sent me a friend request months ago - he's a fan of dh's band.
I generally 'agree' all friend requests unless there's an obvious reason not to, so accepted this one.
This bloke goes through phases of posting/sharing dozens of bikini/topless pics, usually accompanied by comments like 'stunning arse' or 'oooh, so hot...'
It's all a bit Benny Hill. & I suspect he thinks he's being 'appreciative'.
I've had enough & decided to sack the bugger, because I do find these images & comments demeaning & unpleasant.
I could just silently de-friend him, but, actually, I feel quite strongly that I want to 'stand up & be counted' against this normalisation of soft porn.
Any suggestions as to how I could phrase a valedictory wall post conveying reasonably gently that his use of FB makes him come across as the definition of the term 'sad wanker'?
Feminism: Sex & gender discussions
FB acquaintance with a liking for soft porn - anyone want to help me sack him?
ravenAK · 26/02/2011 00:21
Oh just block him, mind you yes, tell him you find his posts offensive so you're blocking him.
Recently I messaged a girl friend that I'm really fond of who kept posting jokes that I found offensive (on a personal level) and asked her not to do it, she continued to do it so I said 'I'm hiding you until you agree to stop posting these offensive jokes' she wrote back and apologised, but I've not bothered to unhide her. And I don't know whether she's stopped posting the jokes.
I still talk to her every day though. 
Facebook schamesbook!
Schmasbook that was supposed to be 
not that it makes much more sense, but you get my drift.
He's not even a friend of yours though, so just block him.
I've no qualms re: getting rid!
...I just think that he's probably being quietly de-friended, on a daily basis, by people he obviously adds fairly randomly.
But if I think his wall posts are sexist & sleazy, maybe I should challenge them - in the same way that I'd challenge an acquaintance who was casually racist or homophobic, iyswim.
I'm finding it unexpectedly hard to frame a comment that doesn't make me come across like Blackadder's Aunt: 'wicked boy!' 
Quite Grevling. That's what's irritating me about the whole situation.
I've spent all evening working on stuff for work, with hourly breaks to potter on t'internet for 10 minutes. Every time I've been on FB, a picture of someone's bum with 'lovely...perfect cheex' or similar captioning bobs up in the feed 
.
I'm really not looking to have a ruck with this guy; as I said, he seems to have added me fairly tangentially. As far as I'm aware he just logs into FB a couple of times a week, & then spends an evening surfing mildly porny images & posting them with 'appreciative' captions, interspersed with the odd band video.
It's not that I'm desperate to prove my point, so much that the point is that I think that this sort of image is pretty ubiquitous & generally goes unchallenged. IMO it's more damaging to the way women & girls see themselves/are treated than yer actual 'porn' clearly labelled & ring-fenced as such...
Ah well. Sod it. I should probably just de-friend him & have done, then.
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
If you want to be nice about it, I think the principle is meant to be comments on the action rather than the person. So rather than you're a racist, what you're doing is racist. Of course you don't have to be nice about it, it's not always the best approach . The closest I come is people posting the email things about 'gang initiation' shite, and I politely find it on snopes for them. Makes no difference though.
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