Excluded

(3 Posts)
laughingeyes2013 Tue 29-Oct-13 14:43:55

My SIL has a bit of a habit of arranging events for my husband and our toddler, either with her or as a treat by themselves. On the face of it, it seems really generous but I am always excluded!

The events that exclude me are always with an excuse. For example, a weekend boat trip had limited berths, however when people dropped out of the numbers I still wasn't invited. Today's invitation is for tickets to a child appropriate show for our toddler. Naturally I wouldn't expect to be paid for, but it would be nice to have the option to join in with my own little team! Today's excuse is this I probably would have wanted to babysit the baby instead. Yeah right! I have quite happily taken baby with me or used babysitters if I need to.

Part of me wants to play down how I feel so I am not giving her the pleasure, and enforcing her ways. But another part of me can see that unless I meet her head on, it won't go away by itself. Question is whether talking to her will make any difference. She already has me down as a 'control freak' because I don't let her boss my life around and dominate my decision making, which drives her insane.

My husband's take in it varies. He was more than happy to go on the boat trip, but today he said we already have plans. Judging by past events I suspect I will have to deal with this one myself.

So I was wondering what people would do in this situation?

laughingeyes2013 Tue 29-Oct-13 14:45:48

I haven't made it clear that the boat trip was last summer so no longer relevant, I had just added it as an example.

Today's scenario is about the tickets for a show.

LadyMedea Tue 29-Oct-13 14:56:01

I think this one is up to you to work on with your DH . It's up to him to ensure that you are treated as a family unit - does he not think that leaving his DW out if family activities is odd? It's different before you have kids as it's normal to socialise with your siblings, but when the activity is family oriented I would expect that to involve everyone..... But she is his sister and he needs to manage the situation.

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