I don't know where to start

[rockybalboa]

I've always been a bit of a yo yo with my weight. I'm 5ft 3 and left Uni around the 11st mark. Got down to 9st when I met DH (over 10 years ago) and now 7 pregnancies later with 3 DC I weigh a revolting 13st 7. I do 5:2 and got done to 12st 7 in the spring but the baby (just turned 1) sleeps badly, I turn to food when tired and haven't done any exercise and I put a stone back on. I'm on week 5 of the Couch to 5k running programme and am shit at willpower so SW and WW etc don't work for me. I know 5:2 can work for me I lost 1st on it whilst pregnant but it doesn't work when I'm fucking shattered. The NHS BMI calculator says I need to lose 4lb 7. I want to lose 3 stone by the baby's 2ndbirthday in a years time. But I just feel like I've been here so many times before and it just gets worse each time.

I also feel like I have this weird body dysmorphia thing where I look in the mirror and think I look ok but could do with shifting a bit of weight and then I see photos of myself and am genuinely horrified by what I see. I don't know how to make myself want jt enough to stick. I can hear the voice in the back of my head telling me not to eat x, y or z or to scrape half what I've put on my plate off or not to have seconds but I just wave it away. I've written motivational notes, given myself restriction/treat targets and it still doesn't work. I'm the biggest self saboteur ever. I'm just getting fatter and fatter and less able to control myself and I'm scared. And this has now turned into a big ranty brain dump. Arrrrgh. How can I make myself do this once and for all?!!

[AggressiveBunting]

Personally I'm not a fan of any diet which restricts major food groups or encourages fasting, be in low carb, low fat, 5:2 / whatever as I just think it can aggravate disordered eating in people who already don't have a pattern of hungry=eat, not hungry=dont eat, not hungry anymore= stop eating . That basically leaves portion control, which is slower to get results but will leave you with something approaching "how thin people eat" which is the holy grail and probably the only truly sustainable way of eating.

Have you ever tried the "change one thing" approach? You've already started with "Couch to 5k" which is a great start. How about you say that from now on, every day without fail, you're going to eat a healthy breakfast of protein and unrefined carbs, so maybe scrambled eggs on brown toast with a grilled tomato. (If you dont have time to cook in the mornings, make yourself an egg sarnie the night before and stick it in the fridge). Don't worry about the rest. Wait until that is an entrenched habit and then move onto the next thing, which might be "I'm not going to snack between breakfast and lunch", then move onto lunch.

The alternative is to identify your worst habits and start with those- e.g. I eat a family sized chocolate bar every afternoon, or I drink half a bottle of wine every night, or I eat a packet of biscuits in the evening.

I also find the easiest way not to snack is just not to have that stuff in the house. Do it while the kids are still too young to notice and complain

HTH

[rockybalboa]

Thanks Aggressive, your response is appreciated. Fasting works well for me precisely because a fast day helps me 'learn' the whole not hungry = don't eat point and then that carries over to non-fasting days. However my diet has been so erratic with my lack of sleep that I have lost what I had learnt and need to relearn it. A lot (probably most) of the excess calories I consume are not because I am hungry, just because I am bored/tired/emotional/whatever. I need to learn to recognise these triggers and address them by doing Something Else. Actually having this brain dump last night has been enormously cathartic and I do feel much more committed to getting this weight lost for good. I like the idea of the Change One Thing approach too. I am guilty of making myself a long list of 'rules' (I did it last night) and then not sticking to any of them but they include things like 'no snacking' and your one at a time approach is much more sensible. I will start with my worst habit (or one of them, I think I have a few!) and take it from there.

Thanks again.

[BathildaBagshot]

Hello! I'm sorry I can't help but just wanted to pop by and say you are exactly like me and here to virtually hold your hand x