We're getting married in 2 weeks, it'll be a small wedding abroad (where DP is from) with just immediate family (12 people altogether). We're having an outdoor ceremony, a garden drinks reception and then a meal at a restaurant.
Today my SIL-to-be declared on Facebook that she's finished writing her 'best man's speech'. This is not the first time she's referred to herself as such (months ago on FB about 'Best Man's dress' and we re-iterated that there's no best man. When we announced the wedding she asked about being bridesmaid and we told her there are none of them either).
I do think it's sweet of her to want to give a speech but a bit inappropriate of her to assume she's doing one. Remember this is a Facebook status not a message directly to us - so for all she knows we will be unaware this speech is happening until the day. The plan is for my dad to speak, then my husband and then me - I know it's not completely conventional but it's what we wanted to do. I think if SIL does a speech too it'll be overkill (that'd be a third of the party doing a speech!) However I don't want a fall out particularly as she says she's written it so may have put a lot of work into it. I wondered about deflecting her enthusiasm onto something else, like maybe at the drinks reception between the ceremony and the meal she could do a quick toast to us as Mr and Mrs... and we'd just have to hope it didn't turn into a full on speech! Or should we just tell her straight that she's not doing one? She will be aware that the restaurant part of the day is fairly informal so may assume she can do an off the cuff speech!
I know I shouldn't really be stressing about it I just think it's a bit cheeky of her!
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SIL uninvited 'best man' speech dilemma!
ThePartyArtist · 21/08/2014 15:29
Just wondering if there's a cultural tradition of lots of people freely doing speeches wherever DH was born.
I went to an event once where every man and his dog had to get there bit in or it was thought you weren't really pulling your weight and didn't really care about the proceedings.
If it's cultural, I'd suck it up, if she's just got a heightened sense if her own importance, I'm still not sure I wouldn't suck it up,while reminding her the best speeches are no longer than 3 mins!! I read that somewhere on t'interweb 
God, how stupid am I - I read it yesterday and meant to reply then 
But I'd let her do her speech, perhaps she wants to sing your praises?
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