How how how to organise a wedding?!

[SuperSnowWoman]

Well it looks like we're getting married and sooner rather than later!

Neither of us want formal or traditional but don't really know where to begin, the websites that pop up in Google are frighteningly full of tiny details that I'd never considered and am (currently!) not that interested in.

All the venues offer the standard ceremony/dinner/disco package and we've sat through so many that we were wanting to do something a bit different- but doesn't everyone!

Anyway, I'm open to all ideas, experiences and suggestions. Any help is so much appreciated!

PS. We've not told anyone hence my quest for advice here!

[AmenGirl]

Congratulations! Would your budget allow for a wedding/event planner maybe? Then all those details are taken care of and you can choose how you want everything to go without having to to do the hard bit?

[hippoesque]

We're going for a church service then picnic in the countryside. Cannot be even a little bit arsed about favours, colour schemes or anything else a hotel would tell you is essential. Do whatever you like doing and add in a marriage!

[worldgonecrazy]

You need to decide if you want a church or civil wedding. If you have a civil wedding you could just have a very small and simply registry office wedding and then have a "proper wedding" celebration anywhere you want, with no restrictions.

I am a handfasting celebrant, and though many of our customers are pagan, there are a large number of people who just want something a bit different, or personal to them. For instance, we had some farmers who wanted to get married under the tree where they had first got together. There was no way they could legally marry there, so they did the registry office quietly with a couple of friends, and then had their "proper wedding" under the tree.

What about something like a picnic, or hiring a yurt if you want a more informal reception? Or a fish & chip van instead of the usual hog roast? Why not think about the things you like, or have a look on Pinterest. Let your imagination run a bit wild and I'm sure you will get some great ideas.

[zairepeter]

Why don't you go for a beach wedding? Its really fantastic I have attended many and enjoyed.
Beaches are the coolest place to get married and I consider it a really suitable wedding destination.

[momb]

Congratulations on your engagement.
We're getting married in August, civil ceremony in a barn, musicians, dancing, circus skill and games. No speeches, no three course sit down meal. Choose the celebration that's right for you and weave this into your wedding.
The wedding in a box hotel packages are an efficient way of entertaining and feeding a set amount of people for a set amount of time. They are good value because the hotel can do it standing on their head.
Don't be sucked in: I started off like you, planning a really simple laid back affair, but I allowed myself to become immersed in the world of wedding forums/blogs and now I'm threading paper cranes (don't ask) and styling 'quirky' guest book ideas, all the while praying for my own sanity and sobbing over my own disorganisation/lack of craft skill. I'm joking of course: it's gonna be fab! (once I've finished threading the flipping crames of course!

[Heels99]

Definitely wedding planner, google some in your area. They know the suppliers and can save you money as well as having loads of great ideas.

[overmydeadbody]

Just think of it as a large party of your choice.

You don't have to do anything apart from the actual ceremony of getting married, so choose whether you want a church wedding or a civil service and go from there.

If you go down the civil route you will need to either get married in a registery office or a licenced place. But you don't have to hold the reception (party) at the same place.

Think outside the box. Do what you want to do.

Decide how you want to get married.

Draw up a guest list.

You and DP both write down the top five or three prioritiesyou want from your wedding. For me and DP it was fun, relaxed, good food, good drink, and only people we both really liked and wanted there.

those were our priorities. Once we had those we could easily decide what we wanted and didn't want, and not get bogged down with things people make you think you need that are not important to you.

[SuperSnowWoman]

Thank you, I already feel calmer just reading your wise words! We'd better start looking then!

[AggressiveBunting]

I agree you should do what you want to do ( and hotel packages are notoriously overpriced) but do pay attention to the logistics because these are key to the enjoyment of your guests. If you plan an outdoors reception you need a wet weather contingency. You need a plan for people to get from ceremony to reception if 2 different venues ( don't assume they'll figure it out- be specific. I'm still haunted by a wedding where the car owners all zoomed off and the rest of us had to wait while the single local taxi shuttled us for 2 hrs- the car drivers had no idea they were supposed to take extras). Think about time from ceremony till meal and provide canapés if a long time. In my experience only the B&G care about unique themes and parties. The guests just like catching up with friends and getting fed enough.

[SaltedCaramels]

There's a great website called 'a practical wedding' which is full of blogs and suggestions about doingthings your way, not the generic hotel package way.