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Panicking my wedding is going to be crap...

13 replies

ChessieFL · 20/03/2014 20:35

I get married 6 weeks on Saturday and I'm starting to worry it's going to be rubbish. Plan for the day is (all in same hotel):

Ceremony 5pm
Drinks/canapés 5.30pm
Cake cutting and speeches 6.30pm
Buffet 7.30
Disco from 8pm

However we have invited almost 100 people but so far only about 50 - 60 coming (I am still waiting for some RSVPs, we gave everyone until 31st March to RSVP.) This is fine for the ceremony and drinks but I'm really worried that after the evening buffet it will all just peter out - 50-60ish isn't many for a disco especially as around 10 of those are older family members who will probably slope off early. Unfortunately there's not really much I can do as it's too late to try and change our plans, everything is booked with deposits paid. On the plus side as we will have fewer guests we may have more money to put behind the bar which might encourage people to dance....
Is it too early to remind people to RSVP next week? I need to confirm numbers to hotel and pay final bill by 3rd April so can't leave it much longer!

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CMOTDibbler · 20/03/2014 20:42

I'd start phoning round to non responders now.

But 50 people will be fine for dancing, and it sounds like a lovely wedding

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purpleroses · 20/03/2014 20:46

Do you have any extras you could invite just for the evening?

Lots of alcohol should help your guests to dance - though preferably served as late as possible in the day so they don't all get wasted in the afternoon and flake out by the evening.

The other group who are great at getting people dancing are young children - girls especially. If you've got any friends who weren't planning on bringing their kids you could always say they'd be welcome to.

But I think people will have fun anyway - even if some of them want to sit around and chat, if you get 10 or so up on the dance floor that will feel fine.

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ChessieFL · 23/03/2014 12:25

Thanks both. There may be a few people we could invite just to the evening but at this late stage it's obvious it's just to make up the numbers so I'm worried I'll offend people if I invite them now. I've just sent an email prompting people to reply so hopefully that will get a few more yeses! Grin Grin

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BertieBotts · 23/03/2014 12:26

Yes remind people to RSVP. You'll get people who won't reply or will change their reply at the last minute anyway so bug them as much as possible!

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ChessieFL · 23/03/2014 12:27

Meant to add we've already said young children are welcome but my friends don't want to bring them, they said they'll enjoy themselves more if they're not worrying what their kids are doing!

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Grotbagstwin · 23/03/2014 18:22

I get married next week and the week before we asked for the rsvps to be in I started messaging people saying just a reminder we need to tell venue the final numbers by 1st april, people replied instantly.
You will have a lovely time, and like your friends all of mine said no to bringing their kids as they wanted a night off.

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purpleroses · 23/03/2014 21:31

I don't think it'll look like an afterthought of you invite them a month or so before the wedding. The traditional time for invites is only 6 weeks. Unless they know the others you invited previously and compare notes.

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kentishgirl · 24/03/2014 17:40

Yep, there's still time to sneak a few more invitations out without it looking obvious. 4-6 weeks before wedding is fine for invitations.

And there will be people who don't RSVP because of course you must KNOW they'll obviously be coming.

anyway, as long as there's enough for a boogie, it'll be great. The dance floors are rarely full no matter how many people are there. Last wedding I went to I think there were 120 evening guests and most of the evening only 20 or so dancing. Mates rather than relatives. So if your mates are there, it'll be fine.

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ChessieFL · 05/05/2014 19:22

Update for anyone interested!
I got married on Saturday (yay!) And it was brilliant. We had nice weather and everything ran smoothly. The evening seemed to go well - I don't think that many people danced but tbh I was too busy chatting to people to notice and whenever I fancied a dance there were always a few others up there too. I had about 60 guests in the end and actually I wouldn't have wanted any more - as it is I feel guilty because I didn't speak to anyone as much as I would have liked to. A few guests I didn't do more than greet them and say thanks for coming (although that's because they left earlier than I expected (before the evening reception started) so I didn't get chance to catch up with them!

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BumpAndGrind · 05/05/2014 19:32

I'm glad you had a lovely time, congratulations Flowers

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VestaRose · 05/05/2014 20:45

Glad you had a great day. Our wedding will be similar numbers and it's good to know this works well.

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rabbitrisen · 05/05/2014 22:47

Thanks for the update. It is always nice when posters update.
Am also glad that it went well.

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purpleroses · 06/05/2014 19:40

Congratulations! Glad it went well. We've got larger numbers coming for ours I a few weeks, and I'm sure I will find I don't get to speak to some of them.

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