Suggestions for alternative bridesmaids roles please.

[Fizzingwhizby]

My DP and I have been together for nearly 30 years, with 2 teenage DCs and this September we are going to get married. We have decided to tie the knot for a number of reasons, mainly that we have managed to survive some very difficult situations and through it all we have remained strong whilst many of our friends of the same age are going their separate ways.

We think this is something worth celebrating and so we are having a very simple wedding in our tiny church, walking to our house and having a knees up at home with around 90 guests.

We are doing it on a tight budget and in our own way.I'm doing my own flowers, have found a simple but elegant inexpensive dress. DP is not having a best man, but our 15 year old DS will stand with him and look after the ring. No cars, no cake. I have said that I won't be having any bridesmaids, but my Mum is putting pressure on me to ask my two nieces, aged 6 and 10 to fill that role. I have tried to explain to her that we just want to keep it simple, I do not want an entourage. Also we have a 19 year old daughter who is not in the slightest bit bothered about not being a bridesmaid.

I feel I have to keep everyone happy so I am trying to think of ways to give them an important role during the service, to make them feel special without having them walk up the aisle with me.

Any suggestions? Or am I being a miserable old bat.

[bagelmonkey]

It's your wedding. Not your mums & not theirs. You shouldn't feel pressured into having bridesmaids.

You could get them each to carry round a basket with bubbles to hand out to the guests to use after the ceremony instead of confetti or something.

[missvague]

You are not being miserable, you should be doing what makes you happy and comfortable. I guess you could get them nice (reasonably priced) frocks and call them flower girls, but not have them going down the aisle with you?

We're currently planning our wedding, DP wants 5 ushers and a best man. I don't want an entourage or undue fuss and formality... Hmmm...

[ViviPru]

I've got a similar problem OP. Its been hinted at that it would be nice if we would give roles to my niece and our goddaughter.

I'm thinking along the lines of bagel's idea. I think we will give them baskets of something to hand out, confetti, or truffles, but I do like the bubble idea.

The tricky thing is the dresses. We're trying to keep the budget under control, and even the simplest high street flower girl dress is an added cost we don't need. I'm currently working on ways to say to the parents that they probably would have bought their DDs a new dress for our wedding anyway, so when they do can they bear in mind she's now going to be a flowergirl. Having them as flowergirls is purely for their benefit anyway.

[Fizzingwhizby]

Thanks everyone. bagel's idea is inspired and sounds right up their street. I was thinking they could also hand out Order of Services when people arrive, as we won't be having ushers..my brother could help them too.
Dresses are not such a problem, as my Mum has offered to pay for those.

Good luck with your weddings...missvague hope you can find a happy compromise!