Bridesmaid dress for summer wedding - unreasonable?

[Elish]

I'm getting married in the middle of summer in Greece this year & can't wait, but I've hit a problem while getting the dresses sorted out.

My ideal dress for my bridesmaids is quite a heavy gown, such as this one: www.alibaba.com/product-gs/377890174/Peacock_Blue_Strapless_Taffeta_New_Tulle/showimage.html

Whilst the bridesmaids are concerned about it being too heavy for the summer in Greece, I am ademant that they will wear it due to it being exactly what I would like...

The one problem is with my 13 year old daughter who I have asked to wear control pants / body shaper to look her best in that gown. She's reluctant to wear one - I doubt it would add much heat for her to wear a body shaper?

They have already all been told they will be wearing long gloves in the similar colour - I just think it will complete the lovely dresses.

What does everyone reckon? Am I being horrible insisting my daughter especially looks her best?

[GrahamTribe]

Absolutely not. Of course you're being reasonable dear. Bored too, clearly.

[AKMD]

I take it that this is a reverse AIBU?

Yes, YABU. Greece in summer is HOT. If you want the attention to be on you then let your bridesmaids wear something suitable so that they don't faint in the middle of your vows.

Asking a teenager to wear control pants is cruel and will give them self-esteem/body issues. If it is your DD then shame on you.

[WorraLiberty]

Well tomorrow is a public holiday so there's no reason why today's threads shouldn't be the 'new Friday'

[Debsbear]

I think YABU to insist your 13 year old daughter wears control pants, you will give her a complex for the rest of her life. YANBU to ask your chosen bridesmaids to wear the dress of YOUR choice but you must also respect their right to refuse to be a bridesmaid if they feel strongly about your choice.

[Debsbear]

Nice dresses though! What about a lighter colour?

[VikingVagine]

This is a wind up, right?

[ChaoticAngel]

AIBU YABU
Reverse AIBU YABU for doing it in reverse.
Wind up 1/10 seeing as I'm in a good mood.

[MissMogwi]

Have a

Not too many though, or you might need some control pants too.

[ViviPru]

OP you didn't really think you'd get a reverse AIBU as blatant as that past this baying mob?

Tedious.

In answer to your REAL query, yes the bride you are being bridesmaid for IBU for making you wear that inappropriate, OTT dark heavy dress and for making her daughter wear support underwear. There. Is that what you wanted? [rolleyes]

[Rhubarbgarden]

[GoblersKnob]

I heat is a problem what about they wear just the control pants and the long gloves? That way they should be cooler, yet still shapely.

[LaVitaBellissima]

www.alibaba.com/product-gs/377890174/Peacock_Blue_Strapless_Taffeta_New_Tulle/showimage.html

There is the link for you!

[MissMogwi]

Same OP as odd tabards thread. Have another

[startail]

This is either a wind up or you are crazy

[BusinessTrills]

There's a box at the bottom of the place where you write, if you click in it it will "Convert links automatically" so that we know what you are referring to.

There's also a whole Style and Beauty section, and another that is all about Weddings.

[wheresthepopcorn]

Feeling for the 13 year old who has to wear control pants all day in the heat - can she not have something tailored that flatters her shape more or do you want the dresses all to match exactly? Would she not feel more comfortable choosing a dress she really likes?

I got married in a hot country in a slip dress and I was very glad that I had chosen it due to the climate. Sweaty face = running makeup. How hot is the climate estimated to be?

[Elish]

I already have the dresses & the 13yr olds is just a bit tight on her... I can't get a bigger size due to the fact they are discounted stock so next size is a lot bigger!

I'm not trying to say my DD needs control pants to help her look, but certainly I feel she needs it to fit comfortably in the dress she will be wearing...

I'm planning to wear control pants for mine too & my dress is a lot heavier with a number of underskirts as well. I know heat will be a nightmare, but I'm already looking at ways to stop sweating as much.

I want to have "another" celebration back at home afterwards for those that couldn't get out to Greece, and I want those dresses for that too.

[OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly]

Get it altered. A good dressmaker can let out seams, perhaps can add in a "stripe" of fabric on each side. They might also be able to reduce the amount of fabric in underskirts etc to make it a cooler dress.

It looks like perspiration city to me (and this will show on navy satin)

Oh and it looks like control pants won't hold you in where the dress is snug - they will be too low down.

[KatAndKit]

Well if your dress is a lot heavier and you will have control pants on, in the 30 odd degree heat, in Greece, all I can say is that your honeymoon is likely to be ruined by thrush and/or cystitis!
I spent almost 3 years living in the Med and those dresses are ridiculous for a wedding in that heat. Either pick something appropriate or get married in England.
It is not the 13 year olds fault that you bought a dress a size too small for her. That was your own stupid mistake.

[wheresthepopcorn]

I am sure it will be lovely if that's what your heart is set on. How about having a backup dress for yourself that may be lighter? (although this would be probably another cost implication) If you feel you are sweating a lot you could always then always change for the reception. Mind you, if the reception is in the evening, it should cool down a little. I would suggest looking at options for your hair where you can have it up in case it's really hot (if it's long). Are you getting married outside? My friend had a REALLY hot day for her wedding but all the guests were given beautiful colour co-ordinated parasols to hold which really helped with the heat. And we were served ice cold non-alcoholic drinks when everyone was waiting for the bride to come which made everything very pleasant. The reverend also moved them to be under a shady tree which helped. You could also make sure that the room where you are getting ready is air-conditioned or has a fan. What I would suggest also is for you to have an extra shirt for the groom - in case of sweaty armpits! Location sounds amazing - congratulations on your big day!

[ViviPru]

If you knew the heat would be a nightmare, why the actual jeff did you think those dresses would be appropriate? Them being 'exactly what you would like' is neither here not there. Your BMs are saints. Nice that you favour your preferred style of dress over the comfort and happiness of those you're closest to.

Buy your daughter a more suitable dress.

[Elish]

Thanks wheresthepopcorn & your ideas are fantastic.

I've got the bridesmaids hair's up for the service and reception too - another battle as the 13yr old doesn't like anything done with her hair!

I really have my hearts set on those dresses & although I know it will be warm I'm sure we will get through it, and the wedding will be how I like it.

I've told the bridesmaids I only really want them in gloves for the photos and for the actual service.. afterwards they can take them off it they want... I just think it adds to the dress.

[FriendofDorothy]

Hahah I hope you pass out at the altar due to the heat. Then everyone can laugh at the silly bride who worse the silly massive dress in a fucking boiling hot country.

Clearly YABU. Let's hope it is a wind up.

[sweetheart]

We went to Cyprus last year and stayed in a really nice hotel that was popular for weddings. Every day whilst we were sunbathing by the pool we saw hot sweaty wedding parties looking rough as you like because they were all boiling in their full morning suits and vast dresses. You may well think those dresses look nice and gloves will set them off beautifully - it's just a shame everyone will look pig ugly in the photo's from the heat and sweat