BLW and Nursery - a bit of support please!

[Cazwa]

My DD is 6 and half months and started nursery a couple of weeks ago. Im doing BLW with her and it seems to be going fine at home. She happily has breakfast and eats a bit at tea-time but is very indifferent about lunch. Im fine with this, shes getting plenty of milk and doesnt seem hungrier or fussier, she obvs isnt that hungry for solids yet.
When I was introducing her to nursery and talking through her food requirements they'd never heard of BLW and didnt get it at all. I printed off the Rapley guidelines for them which they seemed interested in. However, like at home, she never eats lunch. So every day when I pick her up they always are in a panic and say she hasnt had any dinner and that she gets upset when put in the highchair and offered food (they offer her finger foods). I keep telling them dont worry, she doesnt eat lunch at home either even though I offer it, and to keep on offering but not forcing anything.
They have webcam and Ive just watched my DD sat with the others in highchairs for a bit then get moved away from them and put in a swing while the others finish dinner - obviously shes not interested again. But its starting to tear at my heartstrings a bit - am I a bad mum for insisting they dont use spoons?? Im starting to feel that way. I dont know how long I can keep on defending myself when they keep going on about her not eating lunch...
Its slightly mixed in with me returning to work PT this week and feeling generally guilty which I know everyone does, but this BLW lark I feel very isolated and going against the rest of the world!
Just looking for a bit of moral support I guess.

[fluffyanimal]

Hi Cazwa, just wanted to say don't worry! Sounds like the issue is more to do with you going back to work than how your dd is actually fed. If you are confident that she's getting as much food as she wants and plenty of milk, then I think you'd be fine to make sure they stick to your BLW principles. She is pretty young still so isn't going to be having masses of food at this age anyway. If you think she is hungry though, you could always send an extra bottle of milk. I do this with my DS who is nearly 1. He loves his lunch at nursery but nearly always refuses tea there. So I just tell them to give him a bottle instead, and then he usually wants some food when we get home.

I'd only really worry if you thought they weren't finding something else appropriate to do with your dd while the others eat. If she gets some swing time and is happy with that, then I'd not worry. She'll eat when she's ready.

Good luck with the return to work, sure it will be just like riding a bike.

[WriggleJiggle]

6 months is still very very small. Relax. dd wasn't eating 3 meals aday until at least 9 months. Today dd (10 months) had a liquid lunch. If your dd is happy and thriving everything is fine. She'll still be getting everything she needs from milk for months yet.

[DizzyDave]

it's fine. nursery are giving her plenty milk? how long is she there for? like the others have said, at 6 and a half months milk should still be her main food, with solid food just as extras. when she gets more interested she'll tuck in. do the nursery offer any snacks? fruit maybe? if she's coming home perfectly happy and seems satisfied with what she's getting then no worries.

dd started nursery at 7 months and i had to explain the whole blw thing to them. they were fine with it, they just interpreted it as 'so she has toddler food not baby food then?'. now she's 9 months old and she wolfs whatever they give her, far quicker to sort her out than spoon feeding the other babies!

[Cazwa]

Thanks for the reassurance. Im just looking forward to when she does get enough of an appetite/interest in lunches so the nursery can see that Im not making this BLW lark up! Also, I hope soon they'll see how easy it is for them compared to spoonfeeding them. Im sure it wont be long before other mums are starting there doing BLW, I got asked about it at a baby group, seen as the local expert (ahem! only being doing it a few weeks!).

Shes in nursery 2 full days and one half day, soon to reduce to 2 full days with mum and DH doing the third day.

They do give her bottles every 3 hours and she drinks them all. She IS happy at nursery and I dont think they leave her bored when the others are feeding so I'll keep on BLW.

Having seen her just wolf down tomatoes, clementine, fish and creme cheese on ciabatta for her dinner tonight it will only be a matter of time when shes doing the same at nursery!

[Twinklemegan]

Hi - I'm not being difficult here but I am just wondering why you are insisting they don't use a spoon? Especially as it's only two days a week. I use terry nappies but I have gone with the nursery's disposables for the day DS is there as it's much easier for them. If she doesn't want the food she won't take it anyway - you can ask them not to push it. As far as I'm aware spoon-feeding a baby is not likely to lead to them rejecting finger feeding if that's what they want to do - it's not like bottles leading to nipple rejection is it? It just seems a shame that she's being excluded from the social aspect of eating lunch with the other babies.

Having said that, it doesn't sound like you've anything to worry about on the food intake front so stick to your guns if that's what you want to do. But I am curious as to why.

[DetentionGrrrl]

If they've never heard of it (and i am a bit surprised) it may seem very daunting to them, and quite alien.

DS is starting a day a week at nursey soon, and i've told them he has finger foods, and maybe yogurt from a spoon (for mess reasons) they were happy with that, relieved even. Makes their job easier i think.

If you are confident that she's eating enough, and not behaving any differently to the way she does at home, stick with it. Sometimes we find we're doing things a little differently to other mothers- it doesn't make it right or wrong, just follow your instincts about how she is fed.

[DizzyBint]

twinkle- dd isn't excluded from meal times at her nursery at all. she sits at the head of the table munching away while the other babies sit around the table with their mouths open waiting to be spoon fed.

if cazwa is wanting to do blw properly then no she won't want the nursery to use spoons. it's really no big deal, her baby's getting milk every 3 hours anyway and is only just gone 6 months old...so plenty of time to get interested in food. it is perhaps a shame they don't let her just sit in her chair and play with some food (toast or whatever) while the others are being fed..but that's how it is sometimes in a nursery setting...whether the baby is spoon fed or not.

[Cazwa]

Twinklemegan - Ive said Im not against the use of spoons for things like yoghurt, but that the idea is that they regulate their own appetite and feed themselves. Ive also said that if BLW doesnt seem to be working out then Iwill go back to spoons, but Im really happy with it at home so reckon its only a matter of time before she starts being interested in food at lunchtimes.

Ive watched on webcam and they do sit her with the other babies but apparently she starts to fuss after a while so they put her in a swing or on a mat. Id object if they totally excluded her. Im looking forward to the day she does start munching through her lunch and they actually can see she does eat herself.

Saying that she had a choking fit on mashed potato today and threw up all over the highchair tray, I really hope that never happens at nursery as I reckon they'd have a fit, almost like I did! Will stick to more solid solids iykwim.

My nursery has no problems with me using cloth nappies BTW - they are quite brilliant considering Im the only one using them at the mo. They took a stack of them plus wraps and wash and dry them every night and keep them there.