Friend started 15 wk old on baby rice. I'm a bit shocked.

(101 Posts)
pipoca Tue 04-Oct-11 15:05:41

I have a 20 week old DD who is ebf (much to my surprise after failing miserably to bf DS). She's doing great and will be on milk alone til 6 months and then hope to do BLW again as it was great with DS (after a false start with purees before I knew about BLW)

A friend of mine has just started her 15 wk old on baby rice...she "loved it" apparently hmm. Hopes it will help her sleep at night hmm. Don't know her well enough to tell her she's out of her tiny mind explain the reasons for waiting til 6 months to wean so feel a bit sad about the whole thing in general. She's a bit netmumsy in general so in a way I'm not surprised but she bfed her DS to 13 months and is bfing this one so I'm a bit shocked, maybe unreasonably. Just thought if you knew about the benefits of bf and bfed to a yr you'd know not to wean so early?? AIBU?

I can't even begin to fathom why she's bothering to faff about with baby rice at 15 months, never mind the health aspects. Why do people do it?

winnybella Thu 06-Oct-11 09:23:10

Baby is given baby rice at almost 4 months? Shock horror hmm

Butt out and stop being so judgemental, fgs.

Maisiethemorningsidecat Thu 06-Oct-11 09:27:29

If you're a bit shocked at this then I'm guessing that a)this is your first child, and b)you're going to spend your entire parenting life being a 'bit shocked' by other people.

My older 2 were weaned at 4 months according to guidelines and my youngest was weaned at 6 months according to guidelines. I was weaned at a much earlier stage, my 70 year old mum earlier that I was, and my ancient granny even earlier. The point is that we all do what we think is best for our children, guidelines change, and we all tend to survive regardless.

Things do change, as do guidelines. We wouldn't dream of feeding a baby a bottle with brown sugar in it, as my grandmother wanted to do with DS1!

However, this is also about perspective - and a recognition that guidelines are just that - guides to what we should do. And just look at how often/quickly guidelines about food in general change - one minute something is good for you, next minute it's bad for you, then it's good for you again.

If the OP's friend was feeding her 15 day old baby on baby rice, then the OP would be quite right to be so 'shocked'. At 15 weeks? I don't think there is quite the same reason to get so huffy about it.

And I do think using the phrase 'a bit netmumsy' is very unpleasant. It's passing judgement about the OP's friend.

My darling mother had me on mash and gravy at 8 weeks and there's nowt wrong with me grin confused grin

toddlerama Thu 06-Oct-11 09:37:26

I weaned DD1 at 16 weeks because she leaned over and bit my sandwich.

DD2 wouldn't eat solids until almost 8 months which TBH was a bit worrying. We made a lot of juices...

They both eat now. Shocker.

BoffinMum Thu 06-Oct-11 09:39:29

It's not the end of the world, and a bit of baby rice ain't a big deal in risk terms. I would let it go.

pipoca Thu 06-Oct-11 10:00:30

I'm not losing sleep over it. I'm not huffy and I would never dream of saying anything to her about it, hence saying what I think on here. Obviously, no it's not crack and her baby won't die, but given what we know about early weaning, it's not ideal and it's TOTALLY UNNECESSARY!

Yes, I am judging, I judge that she is doing something that is NOT in the best interests of her baby and not necessary and I wonder why she would do that.

This baby is not my first, it's my second. I weaned DS onto purees at 5 and a half months as I was advised that as he was born early (36wks) he would need weaning earlier. I think that was probably nonsense looking back and he wasn't ready for it and it was a hassle and messy. I heard about BLW after about 3 weeks and decided to give it a go and found it much less stressful.

I don't care whether anyone spoonfeeds or BLW, but I am perplexed by why you would bother at 15 weeks and why you'd take the risk that it might do them harm. Yes, I know you're all fine after being weaned onto shanks of lamb at 3 days old, but it's not the point and it's not scientific, is it.

I just fail to see the rush to wean, I really really do. Why? Is it the excitement of a new stage? What's the hurry? If they're hungry, more milk.

I stand by my a bit netmumsy comment. I don't think it was unpleasant.

It was unpleasant, because it was a value judgement.

And all of this is your opinion based on you and your baby. Don't you think your friend is capable of making a decision about her baby and what is best for him/her?

jeee Thu 06-Oct-11 10:11:56

There's some sugglestion that it's unnecessary to wait until 6 months anyway: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-12180052

bigkidsdidit Thu 06-Oct-11 10:13:16

BIWI on the advice of my (brand new qualified) GP I gave DS warm water with half a teaspoon of brown sugar at 15 weeks, twice. Sorted his constipation a treat grin

See!

Case proven grin

pipoca Thu 06-Oct-11 10:14:32

But it's clearly NOT the best for her baby, is it? As a perfectly healthy baby with no problems like reflux, it is clearly NOT best for her baby to be weaned at 15 weeks rather than wait, surely no one is disputing that? Given the faff of weaning and that it is NOT best to wean at 15 weeks WHY bother?

I think it's time to step away probably as I'm not managing to explain myself. I think only one poster has understood what I'm trying to say and has taken the netmums comment in the spirit it was meant. You're all correct that it is NONE of my business, and of course I won't say anything to her, hence why I posted here. We all judge all the time, I think she's wrong to wean but that's her business so I won't say anything but what's wrong with me thinking it to myself, I'm sure she judges me for some of the things I do.

Of course it's unpleasant to call someone a bit netmumsy, in the context of all that other judginess flying around in your OP.

nailak Thu 06-Oct-11 10:16:12

my youngest dc is 15mnths, still bf, doesnt take a bottle, however, he was interested in food before 6mnths, he used to cry when we sat down at meal times to eat etc, try and take the spoon out of my hands,

so i fed him purees for a couple of weeks, before switching to blw, he was around 5 mnths.

not every child is the same and suddenly as soon as they are 6mnths will be ready, it is a process that occurs slowly, some wil wait til later to eat and some sooner, it is a guideline.

and she may be comin from family pressure to wean, i was, my mum constantly told me to put baby rice in the bottle,as it was normal and in all other countries they do it and doesnt harm the kids, i just said yes and then ignored her,

Maisiethemorningsidecat Thu 06-Oct-11 10:16:29

It's not 'best' according to the current guidelines. As for why bother, well, it's her baby and she obviously can be bothered.

pipoca Thu 06-Oct-11 10:21:04

OK. Points taken. I shall retire and remove said judgypants. Each to their own. Just surprised me is all.

moogalicious Thu 06-Oct-11 10:21:32

'out of her tiny mind' hmm

The guidlines change all the time. In 5 years time we'll all be back to weaning at 4 months. My eldest was weaned at 4 months and she shock survived.

moogalicious Thu 06-Oct-11 10:21:56

guidelines

jeee Thu 06-Oct-11 10:23:36

Trying again.

There's some sugglestion that it's unnecessary to wait until 6 months anyway: www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-12180052

pipoca Thu 06-Oct-11 10:24:55

the guidelines don't change "all the time" they have been 6 months for many years. Anyway, enough said.

thinNigella Thu 06-Oct-11 10:30:31

Jeez. Get a life.

It. is. none. of. your. business.

wannaBe Thu 06-Oct-11 10:44:30

well, the guidelines are to exclusively bf until six months yet you say you didn't manage that with your ds? I'm shocked! Think of the damage you have potentially done to your child by introducing him to formula - how unnecessary! hmm

I of course don't think that, actually I couldn't give a stuff. But you see what the guidelines do? they make people think of them as the law when actually, they're not. Because often there are reasons why it's just not possible to stick to them.

And actually, any perceived "risk" to babies is extremely small if you look at the studies (all of them), and there is a lot of evidence to suggest that guidelines need revising back to between four/six months.

People are too hung up on the guidelines. All babies are different. There is no magic button that is pressed at 26 weeks that suddenly makes your baby ready for weaning. Babies have been considered ready for solids much earlier than that for centuries, and now suddenly someone makes it official that they shouldn't be ready before a certain date and all the signs of readiness are discounted? I don't think so.

People need to stop living their lives according to what the books say and start being more observant about their actual children..

Some babies really are ready for solids that young. Mine was, and it had nothing to do with needing more sleep - he slept through the night from nine weeks. But it had everything to do with him wanting food, being starving and refusing his milk yet still crying because he was hungry. I gave baby rice and we never looked back. But then the guidelines were sixteen weeks back then. But I would do it all over again.

Mind your own business op - you have no idea what you're talking about - the books don't hold the magic key you know.

LilyBolero Thu 06-Oct-11 11:00:18

pipoca, they haven't been 6 months for 'many many years' - as I said earlier, my 10yo ds was weaned at 16 weeks, in order to 'not miss the window of opportunity'.

I have the booklet in front of me from 2001 -

How will I know my baby is ready?

Babies are usually ready to start on solid food between 4 and 6 months.

What went along with that was the HV's advice that 'if you start at 4 months, start with tastes of baby rice and banana, and it is best to start at 4 months, as that is when they're developmentally ready'.

now I don't totally buy into this, my other 3 were all weaned at 6mths as the guidelines had headed that way, but even then the HVs were saying that at 6 months you needed to 'crack on with it, and not fanny about with babyrice'.

I don't dispute that it may be better to wait. But it's not something to be shocked about, especially when for generations the guidelines were earlier!

meditrina Thu 06-Oct-11 11:26:17

You have to interpret guidelines all the time.

FSID recommend you do not co-sleep, but many do. Canada has banned baby walkers in safety grounds, but use here is unexceptional. Medised has been withdrawn for infants, but parents still give it.

Your choices might lead to a poor outcome, and observational studies show the association, but they are not direct predictive cause and effect.

Deflatedballoonbelly Thu 06-Oct-11 11:35:36

I think giving tiny babies wallpaper paste 'so they will sleep longer' is disgusting.

But thats my opinion and I will NEVER say it to anyone. I will nod, smile and coo and think it without saying what i really want to, as its none of my business. but jeez, its gross!

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