Sharer anxieties

[LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse]

Meeting and riding out with potential sharer for horse this morning, woke up feeling worried about Very Silly things - what if she doesn't like him (how could she not?) and what if she likes him too much and or, worse, what if he likes her more than me?

Have sharer for pony and it's worked beautifully so far, so hopefully I am capable of being rational and will make a sensible choice instead of feeling petty and jealous. I need the money and he needs the work so what is the problem?

[ManateeEquineOhara]

I totally understand this, I have been very crap at sharing my horses! However I did get one girl sharing my ID and she was really lovely. Unfortunately she could only do one day a week and I wanted a bit more than that, but I would rather have someone I click with and compromise on days.
I have previously had people who just didn't feel right and it never lasted long with them.
So, how did it go this morning?

[LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse]

She seems cool, enjoyed our far far far too eventful hack and keen to have a month's trial. At least with the pony being such a freak (cantering uphill on main road, WHY?) horse looked amazing by comparison. At least I didn't get bucked off until we were off the road and I sat through more rodeo than usual so am pleased about that but otherwise it was shameful when I desperately wanted to pass myself off as a normal person with normal horses that anyone would feel happy to enter into sharing arrangement with.

Was face down in the mud, aware of pony galloping around me (still bucking) in a victorious circle and thought 'wonder if she will swap for rest of hack?' but I didn't ask. About ten minutes later all three (had friend with us too) bolted in different directions anyway when a gun went off nearby.

[ManateeEquineOhara]

Gah! That sounds a bit crazy. My pony bucks out of excitement sometimes too, especially when we are in company and she is behind. I hate her bucks. My horse used to buck occasionally but they were far easier to sit to than the mare's attempts to ping me off her back. Hope you were not too hurt? At least there is not so far to fall on a pony (trying to be positive!).

Glad the sharer seemed cool with it all though, that is very good! :)

[LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse]

Oh I hurt all over today, am definitely getting too old for this. His bucks are like machine gun fire, coming in sort of violent staccato bursts - rapid and deadly! The more I 'ride' that pony the more I love my horse.

[ManateeEquineOhara]

Oh nooo, I hate falling off! Machine gun style bucks sound pretty awful!

[Pixel]

My sister's pony bucks like that, he'll just keep going until he gets you off. That's why I'll only ride him on the road, luckily as ex driving pony he is fantastic there.

There is an article in Horse and Rider (feb) about how to stop bucking, don't know if it would be any help.

[LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse]

I'll have a look for that, thanks. New sharer looked a bit disapproving when she said 'is that a child's pony?' but he hardly ever does that to my daughter - mostly because she won't hack and she rides him alone in the school. Plus she's a very quiet rider and only gets on when he's got it out of his system and is listening. But he will bolt and buck her off if something exciting happens nearby, otherwise he is so lazy and slow you wouldn't believe he was capable of it.

[ManateeEquineOhara]

Ha - that is like my mare. When the kids ride her she is a ploddy dufus of a pony. I get on and she becomes a pony X tank with random eject mode. Well, not really that bad, but there is a very marked difference in her attitude with a child, compared to an adult!

[JRsandCoffee]

Totally not on the original subject of the thread but this may make you laugh......

I used to work at a hacking stable cum riding school, we had a 14 hand cobby connie cross, we'll call him Bob.

Bob was angelic with the kids, he was fabulous for teaching even the teeniest of children, their legs didn't even need to hit the end of the saddle, he'd respond to little kicks on the saddle flap and stop the gently, head up the second they seemed to be loosing their balance..... marvevllous.

Bob with a loud mouthed, over confident, opinionated tourist who reckons four pony treks constituted "experienced" on his back was another matter.... he'd go from dead stop to a brisk staccatto trot jolting them around all over the show, suffer chronic brake and steering failure on a direct course towards nettles and, my personal favourite, he'd walk them into trees..........ones with low branches, and wedge them there while he grazed contentedly underneath with them windmilling around on top. Which was why, having spotted a person clearly lying through their teeth about their abilities we put them on him in the first place....... I feel I should say that I don't recall anyone coming off and that he never damaged anyone (bar the odd tree related scratch).

Sorry, thread hi-jack!

Lovethepinkbits I don't think your sharer worries are in the slightest bit odd, I'd be the same (should anyone wish to share a lamanitic with cushings and rotating pedal bones...)in your shoes and it sounds like you do a cracking job of staying on!!!

[LovePinkBitsOfMyHorse]

Bob sounds amazing, why do ponies get all the personality? Some have far far too much, my Sunday rodeo is all over Facebook. The shame. I am not reactivating my account and reading all about it, not until the bruises fade.

I don't want to share my horse and I've agreed a month's trial. Should I just get through this month, get over myself and see how it goes? I'm sure I had a wobble at start of pony sharing but I absolutely love her and she is a total godsend. Maybe horse sharer will be too?

[Saggyoldclothcatpuss]

Lovepink, what you need is a nice shetland to ride! If things get hairy, you just put your feet on the floor!

[JRsandCoffee]

Bob was a legend, brains, personality and when not in riding school mode, actually quite handsome! I believe one of my successors did him the service of trying to "School" him in draw reins which resulted in a long, long stretch out in the field, once the original injury stopped hurting he must have been gutted.....

I can understand re the sharer, I've never had one officially although a friend used to hack mine out once or twice a week when I was at my old yard, her horse was old and basically out of work. She is lovely and always did exactly as asked (i.e. the ground is like concrete please keep to walk and trot/ canter only on the laid woodchip trails - sensible stuff) and never once wound him up or allowed him to do anything awful. It probably helped that she just wanted to hack so I didn't have to then ride someone else's schooling or, god forbid, watch him like someone else better than me in the school!!! But it was informal and she did ultimately get another horse to ride again so it was less important to her. It worked really well. BUT, there were a few on the yard who just didn't gel with their sharers and it either died a death as an arrangement or there was lots of chuntering. One lady who had had the same sharer for about 10 years or more had been through 3 or 4 in succession before she found someone who she gelled with and lived happily ever after etc. So, I'd be brutal, if you aren't happy at the end of the month I'd just be brave and just say that its not working for you. This is after all your sainted baby, beloved and generally (i'd imagine) provider of the precious hours that you get to think about nothing and everything in peace) so don't let anything spoil that, it is incredibly precious. But I'd give it a month, the right person could well be the godsend you'd like and it may just take time.

Oh god, it's 7.55 - aaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.........work, walk dog, bugger, rats, make lunch, arrrrrrrrrrrrragh, frosty car, arrrrrrrrrgh crashes of barstool at breakfast table and stumbles into action...