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The doghouse

urgent advice please

10 replies

thullo · 21/03/2013 11:37

We have had a rescue dog for 4 weeks now. Things haven't been running that smoothly between him and my other dog but didn't expect them to straight away. Have had scraps over valuable possesions etc but these have been escalating in the last week. Yesterday I left a shopping bag on the floor and all hell broke loose(my fault for leaving it on floor I know). Rescue dog had my dog pinned to the floor by his neck. He let him go as soon as I ran over and screamed but my dog was left terrified and yelping. My husband is now adamant that he needs to go back to the rescue as it is obvious that they are not getting on and he is scared that things might get worse and one of the dogs could end up seriously hurt.
Rescue have agreed that they dont sound compatible but I am heartbroken at the idea of him going back. They have agreed to collect him tomorrow as his old foster home will have him back but I just feel as though we have given up. My husband feels that I am not taking it seriously enough and that one of them will end up badly hurt one day as they obviously aren't suited and that this fight was just to serious:( Do you think it is workable? Any advice?
Other issues as to why the rescue think they aren't suited is that rescue dog shows no interest in our dog, just ignores him 99% of the time, whilst my dog is continuely following him around in a bit of a hyper state trying to play with him. Rescue dog keeps barging my dog out of the way for fuss etc and my dog is running away scared. They are adament that the fights are a dominant issue,and that as 2 males,it is unlikely to get better. My dog has really retreated into himself away from me and my partner which is also very upsetting and his own fear aggression has regressed terribly since 2nd dog arrived.
Does anybody have any advice as to where to go from here? I desperately don't want to send the rescue dog back but it seems that the rescue and my husband are set on it being the right thing to do. They just don't think it is worth the risk:(

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D0oinMeCleanin · 21/03/2013 11:50

I had a foster pup/Devil Dog, whose relationship sounds as though it was similar to this one. It was manageable but I was willing to manage it i.e. fed in separate rooms, no dog toys/treats left laying around, play was supervised, dogs both kept apart when they could not supervised.

Training them to work together to do tricks helped. For example I taught Devil Dog to lie still with a bit of cheese balanced on his head and then taught the foster pup to politely take the cheese from his head.

Your dog sounds like he needs more training/socialising. It's very rude to insist on play when the rescue dog, who after only four weeks, will still be finding his feet, just wants to be quiet. It's very possible that the rescue is giving all kinds of "Leave me alone" messages to your dog and is being ignored which will lead to tension in the house.

If you really want to work on it, you will need to keep them apart when they're not being closely supervised and work with a qualified trainer to work on your dog's social skills and their general relationship. Dogs are better than bitches in that they are less likely to hold a grudge, so the relationship could be improved with work. Some dogs just don't like other dogs, however, so your rescue might never want to play. Devil Dog will tolerate other dogs but never forms a relationship with them, even Whippy is simply tolerated, rather than loved.

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thullo · 21/03/2013 12:08

My dog has been a lot of the problem as his social skills aren't great. We have done heaps of work trying to socialize him along side a behaviourist and he had improved in leaps and bounds, but he doesn't respond as well as alot of dogs as he has a very nervous temperement and always has. He just doesn't respond to calming signals that rescue dog is giving out(which he does,as I pick up on them. moon eyes/lip licks/ears back etc) and we are having to take him away alot. He has regressed terribly since the rescue dog arrived though. He actually jumped on the rescues dog back the other day whilst I was fussing them both.This resulted in another scrap, which was 100% my dogs fault. I can see the rescues point of view that it is better to take rescue dog back sooner rather than later. I just feel that rescue dog trusts us now and he is very loved. I dont want to let him down. But if the signs are there that they wont get on then maybe I should exept that:(
I am definately prepared to put the effort in yes. I can see that my dog is at fault mostly, but would never forgive myself if their differences led to serious injury.
I know this may be a daft question but how severe would you say things are if they are grabbing each other by the neck like that? Would you still put that down as a 'normal dog scrap' or alot more serious?
Thankyou for your reply btw

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EasyToEatTiger · 21/03/2013 12:28

When our youngest dog came to live with us he took no notice whatsoever of the elder dogs. He took no notice of us either. He and our older dog scrap every now and again and the house looks like a crime scene. The oldie always comes out worst and is really now a patchwork dog. There has been a demotion of the oldie as he has slowed down, and this has had the potential to cause problems. When the boys are on the sofa it really matters to them where they are lying and it's important that we humans respect that. LOts of training, lots of watching and learning, keep the dogs separate. There are ways to keep animals together even if they don't love each other. Both boys are very reverential towards our old bitch.

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ExpatAl · 21/03/2013 12:31

Kick the dogs off the sofa if they can't behave on it.

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D0oinMeCleanin · 21/03/2013 13:24

If there's blood it's serious. When dogs scrap it looks and sounds a million times worse to us than it does to them. Our last emergency foster hated other dogs, in particular Devil Dog, there was a failure in our keeping them apart system. They flew for each other. DH was too scared to intervene, it was that bad but to my educated eye, it was all just noise and bared teeth, iyswim. It looked and sounded like they wanted to kill each other, but in their minds they were having a scrap similar to rival siblings, they did not intend to cause damage to each other.

If they wanted to hurt each other, they would have done so by now but that is not to say it won't escalate if the situation is not managed properly.

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thullo · 21/03/2013 13:24

Sorry? They don't have an issue with the sofa and have not mentioned the sofa?? Hmm

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ExpatAl · 21/03/2013 13:27

Sorry, was responding to easytoeat but my connection went. Didn't even think the post had gone through otherwise I would have elaborated.

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thullo · 21/03/2013 13:35

No, there was no blood. The earlier scraps were all snarling/lunging at each other. No contact was made. This time there was contact as he had dog pinned to the floor by his throat, but no blood. He didnt actually sink his teeth in iykwim. It has obviously escalated though which is what husband and rescue are concerned about. They argue that I can't watch them ALL of the time and it could be more serious next time. It was very nasty, and was a serious fight compared to the others, but rescue dog stopped the second I jumped in to pull them apart.
I can see their argument as to why I would risk them causing injury, but I bloody love our rescue dog even though he has only been with us a few months and it just goes against everything I feel to go and give up and hand him back:(

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thullo · 21/03/2013 13:36

Ok, thanks expatAl

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idirdog · 21/03/2013 17:19

Have you had the dog a few months or weeks?

If the rescue is a reputable one I would listen to them. It is no life for either dogs if they are going to be terrorised in their own homes. The rescue will be able to rehome in a more suitable environment

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