When you hate being right!

[mummyflood]

I posted a few weeks ago about DS1 (16) and his 'week from hell' - thought there was probably a love interest causing him to totally lose the plot and forget everything short of his own name.

Turns out that was the case. He has been good friends with this girl since the beginning of year 10, amongst several others - has a lovely large group of mates of both sexes. But you know when a certain name keeps cropping up much more than others - 'g says...g did...guess what g said to me today...' etc, well increasingly the case with this girl. From a Mum's, probably biased, point of view, she has had him running after her like a lost puppy - asking him to post chocolate through her letter box, demanding he invite her to see a band they like, then when he does, making an excuse why not to go, agreeing to go out (as a group) in town then backing out at the last minute causing the full thing to be cancelled.

So he told his Dad last night that apparently he did ask her out, not sure exactly when, but can hazard an educated guess, and.....she just wants to be friends. After a few very obvious moods and lots of texting etc, he says he is fine with this. They are going to be together tommorrow night, again in a group, and she has made him promise he will walk her home....just him, poor lad

[inthesticks]

Poor boy. How sad to be treated like this by a girl when he's this age.
I sometimes wonder whether girls think that boys have no feelings. You may guess my DS1 had a similar experience. You feel their pain at this age just as much as when they were little.

I urge you to resist saying anything negative about the girl to your DS. He may well end up going out with her and you would regret it. I was so pleased I hadn't said what I thought about the girl in question to my son (I did privately consider voodoo pins) because she is now his GF of 3 months....

[mummyflood]

I know, inthesticks. I am being as nice as poss about her - he said tonight in one of his more chatty moods that she is one of his 4 closest friends and proceed to relate plenty more 'g said... g did..' etc. so I just smiled and laughed along, as you do.

Another one of the close 4 however, is from what I have seen the most lovely girl you could wish to meet. Not just my opinion - he reckons she is, in his words, 'the nicest person on the planet', but just a very good friend, and...get this...she is his prom date later this year!!

That phrase 'treat 'em mean to keep 'em keen' springs to mind with madam - not something I ever practised myself!!

[AnyFucker]

my dd has just dumped her absolutely lovely bf

I find myself unreasonably gutted

they have to make their own mistakes...just can be very difficult to watch

[inthesticks]

It is hard to watch. I am dreading the heartbreak at the end. Mummyflood Six months ago she was dangling him on a string and his anguish was painful so I know exactly how you feel. He would come home one day on a high and next day in floods of tears.

As far as I can tell the Girlfriend is actually a very nice girl though she doesn't say much in front of me.
They don't see a lot of each other outside school, apart from the odd trip to the cinema. She works hard at school and has lots of outside interests, they both belong to a really good group of friends. It could be so much worse. They seem to be getting on well. He is so besotted with her though that it worries me. They are 14 and she is his first GF. I feel uncomfortable that he is so serious about his first girlfriend, I'd have preferred things to be much more casual at this age.

Having said all that I wish I'd met a boy who was as kind and considerate to me as DS is. All my early boyfriends were horrible to me!

[mummyflood]

I'm now remembering my early boyfriends around his age. First couple treated me badly, one of whom I was absolutely besotted with, then there was one who Mum & Dad really liked who started off as a good friend, and in all honesty should have stayed that way. My Dad didn't like DH that much at first, because DH is (was) very shy, and it can come across as him being ignorant until you know him. 22yrs later, they get on like a house on fire!!

I can remember absolutely breaking my heart over the early one, who dumped me twice after two-timing me twice, but being relieved when I ended things with the one who should have stayed a friend. (wonder what his Mum & Dad thought of me!! )Mum supported me staunchly but diplomatically through it all, - a lesson to be learned I think.

This is only the first one, for me and him, heaven help us both!! (pass the tissues please guys!!)