Back story,
Me and dh have been made legal guardians of dh's 15 yo brother He was in care as his mother was not in a position to look after him (and still isn't). We have 2 dds ade 1 and 3.
We've had him for about 3 months but things don't seem to be going well. We just can't get through to him. He stays out all night, doesn't come back for meals, he ran up a £300 phone bill (which we really can't afford), and after 2 days of raging we got a grudgng 'sorry bout the phone bill'. (then asked my dh for money to buy cigarettes. He just doesn't understand that he's had £300 from us already and I have to work for about 3 weeks to earn that.
Last night he came back at 11 (which is fine) but with a younger kid, said he had to walk him home, my dh said fine but make sure you come back. No sign of him yet.
We've tried grounding him, but he ignores us (dh ended up hiding his shoes). He's stolen from us, but doesn't seem to get that it's not acceptable. He said ' well if you gave me money I wouldn't have to nick it'
We don't get any financial help only tax credits of about £30 a month and child benefit, which we are so far unable to claim as we don't have his birth certificate. We need to get school uniform for him too which will cost a fortune. This all just adds to the stress.
Is there anyone with teenagers that can give me any advice? We really don't want him to go back into care, but we just can't cope with him as nothing we say makes a difference to how he acts. There's noone else to take him. SS won't let him go back to his mum, his sister is pregnant so could do without the hassle, and his other bro lives in a shared house so can't take him. His dad is not around. It's affecting our dd's now, and the constant worrying os driving us crazy.
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Troubled teen...need advice
4 replies
theslightlypeckishcaterpillar · 29/08/2009 08:11
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