What do your DCs do when they "go round each other's houses"?

[brummiemummie]

Question as above really. DD4 is 13 and has just finished Year 8. She has mild learning difficulties, so I don't really like letting her go places without an adult, even with her group of friends who are very responsible.

Although I have let her go into town (to the pictures etc) a few times this holidays, I thought it'd be nice to invite a few friends over here so I could keep on eye on her without seeming overbearing iyswim. But apparently "Our house is boring, Mum!"

The trouble is DD isn't really very confident and so wouldn't suggest her own ideas of things they could do, so they would either just be hanging around awkwardly or I would have to suggest something for her, which would be obviously be "SOOOO uncool", lol.

The older DCs are particularly unhelpful too, one was very into makeup/magazines and that kind of thing at that age and my son just played on the computer and played football in the garden and that, neither of which DD4 is at all into. The other DD and her friends have always met up in the park or the cafe and very rarely at ours, which of course is no help.

I'm just wondering really if you could tell me what your teenage DD is into and what she might do if she went to a friend's house/her friends came round, so I can pass some ideas on to my DD.

BM x

[mumblechum]

Sorry know nothing about girls, ds and his mates tend to congregate round the ps3 or go out for bike rides, but bump for you

[ScaredOfCows]

Can you ask her what other teenagers have at their houses that make them more appealing? What about getting a trampoline, or could they 'camp' in tents in your back garden overnight?

[brimfull]

ime all the want to do is hang out and chat in a place no adults can over hear them ,have access to a computer or a tellly and it's even better.

[BodenGroupie]

My youngest is the same age. They seem to spend hours taking (innocent) photos of each other in bizarre outfits, updating their Bebo pages and watching chick flicks. Although she is mature she isn't in the cool gang so I don't have any worries about what she's up to (yet).

They also go into the local (very small) town and just go for walks/bike rides quite often.

Agree about the camping though they normally appear cold and exhausted at 3am.

When DD1 was this age she and her friends spent a whole summer compiling a scrapbook of what their life was going to be like - a Jack Wills bedroom, flashy cars, Jimmy Choos etc! Sounds very immature but they are very arty and it was all beautifully illustrated.

I think it's quite difficult at 13 but you have to stand back and let them fill their own time.

[brummiemummie]

ScaredOfCows - I have asked her, but she isn't very forthcoming! I know one of her friends has a trampoline at her house but I don't think DD likes going on it very much as she is quite clumsy with bad co-ordination and she can't do any of the jumps and things, even the simplest ones.

BodenGroupie - Those are the sorts of things my DD1 used to do with her friends, but I don't think I would be comfortable letting DD update her Bebo without my supervision as she would most likely not know when to stop and put all sorts on there; she's not very good at thinking about the consequences of things . Also her and her friends are quite self-conscious and they are the type not to put many pics of themself on Bebo and the like so I don't think they would want to do the photo thing. I may suggest the scrapbook though, that sounds like a brilliant idea!

I think what I will do is let her have two or three mates over and they can sit in her room chatting. She has a PS2 in her room so they can watch DVDs (we will raid DD1's collection for some "cool" chick-flick type ones) and play on SingStar and the like. Think that should keep them occupied for a good few hours!

Thank you for all your help everyone.

BM x

[gagamama]

I don't have any teenage DCs but when I was that age I used to love making things with my friends - maybe they could make their own pizzas for lunch, or rice crispy cakes, and then sit down and watch a movie whilst eating them? I also used to love making movies with my friend's dad's camcorder, such as comedy sketches or stop-start animations. Karaoke is always a good one too, or making a 'band' if you have any instruments. Even better if you can 'film' your performance!

[BodenGroupie]

Oh, I forgot the cooking!

Mine are home alone and I keep coming home to batches of pink cupcakes and brownies. It's a tough life...

[kingprawntikka]

My 13 year old and her friends do karaoke, watch films , do make-overs on each other and chat on MSN to others from school.

[mumeeee]

They watch DVD's ,play on the games consule, go on the computer and gerally just chat to each other.

[tatt]

just chat, sing, watch DVDs, play computer games, compare mobile ringtones and what they have on their MP3s and I suspect talk about boys.

How about hiring a DVD and getting out the sweets and popcorn?

[FleurDelacour]

My 13 year old and her friends chat, watch DVDs, listen to CDs, play on the Wii (Mario cart racing against each other is the current favourite), they do each others hair (hair straighteners are popular), take photos, play with the pets, walk to the shops, play in the park, go to the cinema, on the computer MSN and Facebook are popular (Farmville is the current hot application) and they pore over fashion magazines. They also like cooking chocolate cake. Nothing highbrow about any of it but they seem a contented bunch.