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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

13 year old and smoking

3 replies

financialwizard · 15/08/2014 16:33

I just cleared out my son's room and found papers and two roll up's with tobacco and filters in.

My son is away at the moment so have time to think how to handle this, but just wanted fomeone's guidance.

Btw I wasn't snooping clearing his room I told him I was going to do it before he went away.

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financialwizard · 15/08/2014 16:33

*someones

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Heyho111 · 16/08/2014 07:50

My gutt reaction from reading your post is that he's experimenting.
If he is seriously smoking he would have taken it all away with him.
I expect he has been given what he's got.
What todo. I would probably try and have a long chat at the kitchen table when he's home. Make a cuppa for you both or juice and ask him to sit with you. This set up is quite grown up and will unnerve him. Say to him. 'Tell me about the rollies and papers' then let him answer. You say nothing. Just let him answer. When he's finished what he has to say you still say nothing. Just wait. Humans can't cope with silence. He will then say more and you will get more info about it.
Some will say take away phone money etc. that's up to you. The prob is it could cause him to rebel.
I think a chat about peer pressure and why he feels the need to do it. If he only has limited pocket money he won't be able to afford to do it seriously.
I feel for you as it's so hard to know how to play these situations.

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financialwizard · 16/08/2014 08:14

Thanks.

I am not going to get all heavy handed with him because you're right it won't work and to be honest I am shocked mainly because he is so set against his Dad smoking (I left him years ago so we have no smoking in our home).

Tbh I have not smelt smoke on any of his clothes so am wondering if he is looking after them for someone.

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