Leaving home at 18..(not for uni)...any experience?

[smileyforest]

Thats..it..DS wants to go now..does not want to F.....g live with me...But how? no full time job...supposed to be doing A'levels in Sept in another Town....He has no idea....

[JellyBeansHaveNoAgeLimit]

I moved out at 16, went to college & claimed benefits to support myself. Staying at home wasn't an option for me but i wish i could have been as i would have been able to get some money behind me.

Although i don't really like my mother our relationship definitely improved once i left home so it could turn out to be a good thing? It will be v hard for your DS though.

[Squtternutbaush]

I moved out at 16.

Got myself a childcare apprenticeship and claimed appropriate benefits for housing costs etc.

My mum and I were at the stage where we would argue about everything and I couldn't be arsed with it, she moved 200 miles away and now we're best friends.

[ChillySundays]

Remember reading a while back that there would be no housing benefit for under 25s. Has this come into effect? If so, how does he expect to afford to leave home. Sounds like he think the grass will be greener?

[randomAXEofkindness]

I moved out at 18 because my mum was shit. I rented a room; worked in a call center to pay my bills; and did A-Levels in the evenings at college. I can't describe the relief I felt when I lay on my new bed the day I moved in, it felt like every muscle in my body relaxed for the first time: bliss.

[randomAXEofkindness]

Maybe the grass will be greener.

[smileyforest]

Ummm...maybe grass will feel greener for him...good point...!
Finance a problem though...as yes...no benefits now? I honestly think it would be a huge shock to him..he is quite alternative..and headstrong....

[smileyforest]

I don't think I'm shit...too caring maybe???

[dashoflime]

I moved out at 16, claimed benefits and lived in a squat. Thats not an option these days of course.

My Dsis left home at 17, stayed with a friend, didn't like it and moved back home. Then left again at 19 and moved in with me.

It would be hard for him but if he can pull it off it might improve his relationship with you. Me and Dsis certainly got on better with our parents with a bit of distance.

[ivykaty44]

My dd moved out at 18 and lived in a hostel, then a flat eventually moving in with a b/f then came home two years later...friends said omg moving home. Dd loved it and she had grown up considerably, was pleasant at home. She stayed for about a year then moved to another b/f flat now they have a house etc

Let him go, let him find his own way and don't hold him IP.

[Haffdonga]

I would 'support' him by agreeing with his plan but leaving it for him to arrange. Frankly it's almost impossible for people his age unless they are earning a good wage. He wont get benefits and wont be able to rent anywhere without a big deposit.
Has he got a job?

So go flat-hunting with him and help him plan a budget. Then work out how much he'll have to earn to support his planned bachelor lifestyle in his new pad.

If he manages, good for him. You'll probably appreciate each other much more when you can go to his for a coffee. If he fails, he'll appreciate much more.

[headlesslambrini]

How about a residential college. Depending on your household income you may get help with costs. Usually specialised courses though rather than A levels eg countryside, forestry, agriculture etc

[plentyofwine]

My dd has moved to New Zealand for 2 years and she's 18

[Princessjonsie]

let him find out the grass isnt greener and he will come running back with tail between his legs. Risky I know but im a firm believer in tell them the consiquences and then they make there own decisions but they have to live by it and put up with the good and the bad.