My DS is 14 - 15 in 6 weeks but still only 14. Last night he told me that he and his friend who is already 15 (she is his friend not even girlfriend) had talked about being friends with benefits and would I please get him some condoms???
Now he is still a virgin which he openly will discuss with me but she has been sexually active for last 6 months with her now ex boyfriend.
So apart from the initial shock, I am seriously concerned not just about him having under age sex but also the fact they are like best friends and that this will clearly impact on the friendship. I have talked through with him that whilst he may well be physically ready I do not believe that he is emotionally ready and he needs to understand the emotional impact of sex not just the doing it bit. I have talked to him about the importance of protection for years so this is why he asked me to provide them? I have told him that both DH and I were both 16 before either of us lost our virginity but I am also really worried about how he will cope with the loss of friendship (it was not that long ago that he was at the doctors with depression and talks of self harming - although hadn't acted on it) as she is the centre of his circle of friends and if they fall out which I feel will be inevitable it is likely to be him that is no longer part of the group.
I told him that I do not condone under age sex but I still feel that I need to buy him the protection because realistically I know that he will just go his own way anyway because what do I know? My DH thinks that buying them shows that I am condoning it but doesn't see that we have much choice faced with the alternatives.
I feel like this is just one great big car crash waiting to happen and I don't know what to do to help with damage limitation other than ground him until he is in his 20's :(
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14yo DS has asked me to get him condoms - out of my depth
13 replies
sanityseeker75 · 04/06/2014 14:57
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