Sibling Issues : Ten + Pre-teen

[piepollocks]

My 13 year old daughter is beautiful, popular, clever, kind, artistic, exceptionally good at maths and sciences, sings like an angel and she's also funny .... but her younger sister (by 16 months) is all these too (with slightly different emphases) and as far as academics goes, she is off the scale. We don't treat the girls differently and love them equally however DD1 feels upstaged by DD2 and it is now becoming an issue - particularly when they bring reports home from school. I keep emphasising that academic success is not everything, that DD1 is plenty successful in her own right (we are incredibly proud of her) however, I don't think it is fair to minimise DD2's successes either. Help.

[zooweemumma]

Well you should try and treat them the same I guess. So if dd2s report is glowing, congratulate her but also pick out the fab thing about dd1s and praise that? Dd1 sounds plenty successful in her own right, she needs to learn that to you can't be best at everything. I am sure there are areas where she excels or something that she does that dd2 doesn't?

[purpleroses]

My DS (13) is similarly upstaged by DD (10). I do try to keep all the conversations I have with them about schoolwork 1-1 even shutting DD out the room sometimes. Is your DD2 mature enough to respond well to a request not to rub it in when she's done better than DD1?