Quick opinions needed - should I give ds spends for school trip?

[lilibet]

It's ds1's (13) school trip to Alton Towers tomorrow, it's been greatly anticipated. He gets £10 a month pocket money which he always puts straight on his phone, this weekend he has had a fiver off his dad which he spent on a game and £2 off his Grandma whcih he still has. We have said that if he does some jobs we will give him some more money as we know that with just £2 when his mates have got more he's not going to have as good a day. He won't be able to buy lunch, he will have to take sandwiches, he won't be able to buy the photos of him and his mates on rides etc etc.

He has tidied his sock drawer for a pound and watered all 11 of my tubs for another pound and is now refusing to do anything else. He doesn't see why he should. He doesn't see why we can't just give him the money.

I wnat him to have a good day and we were thinking of enough jobs to give him a tenner or so and as you can see we were hardly getting him to sweep the chimney. When ds1 (9) had his trip a while back he did jobs to get £5 which was the maximum they could take.

I know in the mornign when I only give him £2 for a day out I'll feel really crap - what would you do?

[SecondhandRose]

Give him enough to eat and drink and a fiver to blow on junk. In my opinion he'll spend the day worrying about what he's going to buy if you give him too much.

[SherlockLGJ]

Give him a packed lunch...............£2 spending money and send him off with a hard life lesson.

[Yorkiegirl]

Message withdrawn

[sugarfree]

What Sherlock said!
Or do you still want to be giving him money because he hasn't earnt any when he's 19?
He'll soon see "why he should"

[nicnack2]

give him what he has earned, if you give him more now he will continue to think that you will give him the money regardless. its hard to do but a lesson well learned

[southeastastra]

i gave my son a tenner when he went to alton towers with the school, he spent about £6 of it on toys for his little bro

[lilibet]

You see his little brother earned his fiver and so I know thta I shouldn't give him anymore and that really wouldn't be fair.

[DevilsAdvocado]

I'd remind him about his brothers earnings. Can't you up the payments of 4 more jobs to about £2 each? That way he can make the £10 a bit faster for fewer jobs? But I'm a softie who would just give him spending money for no reason anyway

[nicnack2]

south what a nice big brother

[southeastastra]

i know it was so sweet!

[BonyM]

Personaly, I would give the money if it's for a school trip, but the problem is, you have set a precedent by making his brother earn his money.

I suggest you let him have an advance on his pocket money, and then he can do more jobs if he wants to earn more.

[BonyM]

"Personally"

[Tortington]

fuk me how many drawers have you got? i'll tidy drawers - my own at that - if you give me a pound.

why feel really crap - does work not = money in the real world?

sorry he sounds a tad spoiled to me

[mumeeee]

My 14 year old has £10 a montth. I wouldn't expect her to do jobs to earn spending money for a school trip. ( she is expected to tidy her room and be on the family bathroom cleaning rota without being paid for it).
He has done somethings you ask and £2 would probably just be enough for a drink. So I would give him another £5 on top of the £2 you were going to give him. I always give my children enough money for lunch when they go ob trips as I think if they were with me I would probably buy lunch.

[lilibet]

Custy, he isn't spoiled, he gets a tenner a month pocket money from me and dh and everything over and above that he has to earn. I admit that i was giving him easy jobs, but they were much the same as his brother did.

My way of looking at it is that he has had his tenner off us and another £7 of his dad and grandma, he could have saved that for the trip but he didn't. I can't afford to give him extra money all the time so I was trying to make a point by getting them both to do jobs.

I just thought that he would bloody well do them instead of being a stubborn little sod!!

Bloody hate teenagers !!

[Kathlean]

Your son has had £17 this week which he has chosen to spend as he wants. He must have known that he had a school trip coming up yet he still made the decision to spend it elsewhere.

You have given him the option of earning extra money which he has refused. He has made a choice. Respect the choices he has made because at 13 he is old enough to learn responsibility for his choices.

If he has a packed lunch you know he will not starve.

Your other son is younger and also made his choices they were to earn the money.

[nicnack2]

we gave our teenager form 14 30 pounds a month. For this he had to do chores ie empty dishwasher, mop floor and tidy room. If he wanted more he had to do additional chores. Unfortuately what would happen was dh would give an advance on pretext that jobs were done they were not. i think alot of teenagers have the attiuded that they dont need to earn money.

[schneebly]

I wouldn't give him it if he isn't willing to earn it tbh!

[DevilsAdvocado]

Does he have to pay to go on rides and stuff though? I'd hate my kid to go somewhere with no money and not able to go on rides and things. If it is just spending money then make him do a few wee jobs tonight to earn some more cash

[Kathlean]

No the rides in Alton Towers are free once you are in.

[DevilsAdvocado]

nicknack £30 a month at 14??? My goodness.. I got a job at 17 and up until then I was still getting £1.50 on a sunday for sweets! I find myself shocked at a lot of things these days and I'm only 28!

[lilibet]

Kathlean - I think you have summed it up perfectly but it's still hard as I really want him to have a great day and know that on the bit of money he has he is going to be limited.

Heigh ho

[nicnack2]

mmm i disagreed but he is my step son. half the time it wasnt given as no chores were done. i remeber at 17 getting the £7 pounds my mother got for family allowance. I remeber also getting 10p a week pocket money. Mind you you could by alot for 10p co of the halfpenny chews!!!