My feed
Premium
Please
or
to access all these features

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

Good reasons why 'working' a 7 day week is a bad idea (ideally reasons that a teenager will believe)

31 replies

KatyMac · 16/08/2013 21:01

DD is doing flexi-schooling; so an hour off on a Friday morning and Tuesday afternoon off

She wants to spend Saturday & Sunday in London studying; can anyone give us good reasons why it's a bad idea....other than we don't think it's a good idea

OP posts:
Report
OverTheFieldsAndFarAway · 16/08/2013 21:05

Because all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
She will burn herself out before she get to Uni.

Report
KatyMac · 16/08/2013 21:07

Not going to uni - but I can adapt & use that, thanks OvertheFields

Work/study is fun so that's a bit awkward

OP posts:
Report
Ragwort · 16/08/2013 21:10

What sort of 'studying' will she be doing in London? Does it involve a long journey to get there?

To be honest if that was my teenage DD I would be inclined to let her try it - is there any 'penalty' involved if she has to give it up? Then she can make up her own mind if it is too much or not. I used to work seven days a week in my teens and early 20s - I loved it, didn't have a home/housework to worry about, had lots of friends where I was. Couldn't do it now !

Most parents struggle to get their teenagers out of bed before midday so the fact she wants to study must be a good sign surely? Grin

Report
littlemisswise · 16/08/2013 21:11

DS2 (16) has been working in a part time job over the Summer. He recently did 7 days in a straight, hours varying 11-3, 12-6,8-3. He was knackered. He doesn't sleep brilliantly because of his asthma, his meal times were 'out'. By the time he got home, had something to eat, got changed, etc, there was no time for anything else. He was like a machine and it took it's toll.

I should imagine doing it permanently could make you ill.

Report
YoniBottsBumgina · 16/08/2013 21:14

Does she stand to lose anything if she starts it and drops one or two days? If not I would be inclined to let her try it - she'll soon find out why it's not a good idea and that's the point where you offer sympathy and suggestions to try and tip the balance a bit.

Report
sandiy · 16/08/2013 21:14

Because she needs to get a part time or baby sitting job on weekend in order to make herself more rounded as a person for cv or applications.Its a tough market any kind of work experience is worth it's weight in Gold.People will not neccesarily take seriously someone who has limited life experience especially in more people orientated professions.

Report
KatyMac · 16/08/2013 22:30

That's what I worry about Littlemiss

It's dance classes - she wants to go to vocational school next year & this year is a big one GCSEs, Dance Exams & Auditions

London is about 3.25 hrs door to door

I guess trying & seeing is what I thought would work as one word from me & she does what she likes anyway Wink

Her work experience would be limited as I'd make her do homework/coursework on her day off anyway as doing it her way she would be doing that on the train

OP posts:
Report
sashh · 17/08/2013 08:09

Could she just do a Saturday in London?

Does she have anywhere to stay if she is doing 2 days? Otherwise her Sunday journey will be terrible, lots of engineering works, bus replacement etc, a 3.5h journey can easily become 5 hours, and that is far too much. How would she feel arriving 2 hours late for class and then spending hours on a bus instead of a train?

What is wrong with homework on the train? Lots of business people work on the train.

Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 11:45

No problem with homework on a train but if she isn't on the train I wouldn't let her get a job anyway as she is working so hard (but maybe I'm a pushover Wink)

OP posts:
Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 11:46

Oh & it's 45 mins to the train, 2 hr train & 30 minute tube & walk to class

But I agree Sunday travel is awful! Sad

OP posts:
Report
purplepenguin86 · 17/08/2013 13:12

Would she be dancing 7 days a week? That isn't good - your body needs some down time to recover. She needs at least 1 day a week with no dance/exercise at all.

Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 13:50

2 days Wed & Thurs but she might sing on one of them

It was the relentlessness of it all that worried me

OP posts:
Report
peggyblackett · 17/08/2013 13:58

She risks getting mediocre results across the board. Trying to fit too much in could mean poorer GCSE results and not achieving what she wants with her dance.

(Not being negative, just that you asked for reasons!).

Can she stagger the years? Do GCSEs this year and then apply for dance school the next? I too would worry that she will be knackered and then either under achieve her potential or worse burn out.

Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 14:16

Oh I agree

However I have found if I say flat out "no" she does it anyway; I need tactics I think

OP posts:
Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 16:57

She can do just Saturday - I'd prefer her to do just Saturday

But realistically doing over 2 years is pointless; chances are she will be planning her new career/returning to education at 30 so an extra year now is a waste of time

OP posts:
Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 20:53

I think I find 'fun' things easier to say no to
'Can I go to a mixed sleepover' "NO"
'Can I go to a gig 100 miles away with a friend driving' "NO"
'Can I have a party while you go away for the night' "NO"

'Can I work even harder than I am now; to better enable me to have a career - even tho' it's a fairly stupid plan and may cause me real problems/issues' "Well I'm not really sure dear, do you think it's wise?"

Slaps side of head

OP posts:
Report
LynetteScavo · 17/08/2013 20:57

Urm....even God has a rest on the seventh day.....(desperately grabs as straws)

Six days a week, yes. Seven, no.

Report
KatyMac · 17/08/2013 21:08

That's a good one Wink

OP posts:
Report
purplepenguin86 · 18/08/2013 00:28

I would do Saturday or Sunday, she doesn't need both. Which schemes are they?

Report
goodasitgets · 18/08/2013 00:35

Her body will need the rest for muscles to recover - even my personal trainer (working for a bikini comp) has "rest and regrow" days

Report
KatyMac · 18/08/2013 09:58

I know it's too much; I just struggle to convey that info to her Blush

London Studio Centre on Saturday & Artistry Youth Dance on Sunday

There are some good photos of the Artistry on Facebook & You-tube but I think it may have to be the one that goes - DD is very against that tho'

OP posts:
Report
zipzap · 18/08/2013 10:20

See if you can find some of the actual weekend train times recently and see if they have been horrendous - might help to dissuade her.

Would any of her dance teachers be willing to point out that she needs at least one rest day?

Is there anything closer that would be a good compromise as much less time travelling?

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Ipsumlorem · 18/08/2013 10:23

I think you should let her try it tbh. I may be slightly biased in that I (and a lot of my friends) did not grow up in well off families and therefore had to work nights during the week plus weekends from 16years of age onwards (through sixth form at school and first degree at uni) in order to pay for the nice clothes/socialising/extras that are important for teenagers. To be honest yes we were tired at times but we all did fine at school/uni and are in professional jobs now so it didn't do us any harm and in fact probably contributed to the development of a good work ethic overall. Teenagers and young adults tend to have more stamina for this sort of thing and at least she would be participating in/studying something she has chosen/enjoys on those extra days not breaking her back stocking shelves for some asshole just so she can go to the cinema with her friends

Report
KatyMac · 18/08/2013 12:53

She has been doing the Sunday since Easter & it's been OK (so far)


Part of me agrees with you Ipsumlorem & part of me worries she will burn out

OP posts:
Report
Ipsumlorem · 18/08/2013 13:10

Is there any scope for you to agree a 'trial period' for a set amount of time, after which you review whether or not (based on any negative changes in her behaviour/general demeanor/tiredness) to allow her to continue?

There is also a chance of course that the idea of doing 2 extra days may appeal much more to her than the reality when put into practice? Wink

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.