Daughter and wife in physical fight - what to do?

(186 Posts)

My 13 yr old daughter is really pushing boundaries at the moment, all the usual smirking and cheeky answers etc. But today which was meant to be a family day began with her refusing to put her shoes on. It sounds silly but it just got more and more antagonistic.

I managed to make peace with her and she helped me in the garden for a an hour or so.

But before we went out an argument about clothes with her mother got so out of hand I had to physically step in and pull them apart as her mum was actually trying to throttle her.

They both said appalling things which neither really mean and they spent the rest of the afternoon apart, and things have calmed down now but U'm just so shaken and upset by what happened I just don't want anything like this to happen again...
sad

cupoftchai Fri 23-Aug-13 21:51:08

www.mankind.org.uk/ this was already recommended upthread. they have a helpline.

also these
www.mensadviceline.org.uk/mens_advice.php
helpline, more advice.

call them!

SunshineBossaNova Fri 23-Aug-13 22:52:26

Well done Northern. Look after yourself.

AdoraBell Fri 23-Aug-13 23:10:57

Very well done northernDad and as for you 'forcing' her to see the GP, can you see the way she's distorting it? You are not forcing her, you have simply made the appointment that she wouldn't make. Do, please, talk to your parents and the helpline linked above.

Take care and keep the safety of your DDs in mind to keep you on track.

My DW has been to the GP and for the moment she's been prescribed a higher dose of her current medication (Sertraline) and will be fitted with a Mirena Coil. She will also be going to some counselling.

i also visited my GP and was prescribed some anti-anxiety medication.

It's early days but things seem better.

SunshineBossaNova Sun 01-Sep-13 12:51:41

Hope you're ok Northern x

@SunshineBossaNova

Thanks. I am feeling less stressed, and life seems to be no more or less worse than it is for most people.

Fingers crossed life will stay on an even keel as i have work related exams on the horizon.

cory Sun 01-Sep-13 23:06:51

Best of luck for the exams, northerndad, and well done for hanging in there.

cory Sun 01-Sep-13 23:07:52

Just make sure she knows that if it ever happens again you will call the police.

SunshineBossaNova Mon 02-Sep-13 00:21:53

Best of luck northerndad, take care.

Wuldric Mon 02-Sep-13 00:27:50

I think the OP is married to Charles Saatchi ... Only this time, CS is taking it out on the kids!

Seriously though, I think you either need to remove your daughter to a place of safety or your DW to a place where she is not going to threaten your children. Your first obligation should be to your DCs who are not able to protect themselves. You seem to be conflicted with that. Do you have any doubt that your first obligation is to protect them?

Utterly ridiculous behaviour. And yes, I do have teenagers. And yes, they are PITAs.

BeckAndCall Mon 02-Sep-13 11:15:43

wuldric I think you need to read the whole thread and see the journey that northern dad has already been on to get to here. He's doing a great job in getting help and support where it's needed and really doesn't need reminding about his responsibilities right now.

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