I can't get rid of the thought that other peoples' teenagers are much easier than my 14-year old DS. I talk to 2 sister in laws of mine who have a combined 7 teenagers and they seem all so...well, 'normal'. They all play instruments, they are good and even brilliant at sport and they are good or very good at school, they have friends and engage in a lot of activities.
My husband and I were like this as teenagers as well.
Our own DS is underperforming at school - the teachers call him 'lazy and silly', he constantly lies to us, he is bad at sports, bad at any musical activity, has poor social skills (somewhat improved recently) and generally not interested in anything else but computer games. We always struggled to control his difficult behaviour - it was a hard ride.
I know many of you struggle with far worse problems than I do but I still find it hard to let go of the disappointment that I feel about him.
When DS was in primary school I used to help him a lot. I think he had mild adhd and dyspraxia but was never officially diagnosed. I did years and years of physical exercise programs with him, spelling games and math games, you name it.
Now he is older, he obviously and healthily wants to have more independence and without my constant support (some would call it 'pressure') the whole picture of his poor performance and lack of motivation becomes more evident.
I try to tell myself that our children are not there to make us proud or to give us anything at all but deep down I feel this rage towards him (which I try to not to take out of him).
If you reply can you kindly try to not judge me because I am doing this already myself. I genuinely want to find a way to not be so disappointed and more accepting of the situation.
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Teenagers
Do I have too high expectations?
31 replies
Palika · 25/06/2013 12:38
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