Summer holidays? DD just 14, DS just 11, new area

[ThresholdMum]

What would you do? We are moving back to UK at the start of the summer holidays, to a new area, after 4 years abroad where security has been a real issue so DCs haven't had the space to be independent outside the house. Both are pretty sensible, (DD just 14, DS just 11) and have spent afternoons alone (& DD longer), but we'll have 2 weeks getting to know the area (and hopefully find some activities they'd like to do) before I start work full time in August. But its quite stressful for them joining summer schemes when you know absolutely no one in the area, so I think its possible the planned activities side might not work.

They get on fairly well, so could look out for each other or check in with each other too, and I'll be working in same town and accessible by phone and could come home in an emergency, - and I think DS will be delighted just to hang out in a park with his skateboard - & they are going for a residential camp for a week halfway through August, - but do you think this sounds realistic or negligent for two weeks? Park, finding feet, mooching at home, ideally possible activities but no active adult oversight. They could go and stay with relations elsewhere, but I think it would be far better for them to find their feet & ideally have fun in the new area - if it isn't too overwhelming and they feel dumped.

[PowderMum]

My teenage DD tell me that they really enjoy chilling out at home during the summer holidays. However this is only for around 4 weeks as we also go away on holiday. I haven't bothered with planned activities since they left primary, however I do have family close by and the may see them or go out with friends.
In your position mine would like the time to settle in, unpack and relax. They get on reasonably well and I am only 15 mins away. There used to be house rules, no cooking on the gas, inviting friends over (unless I knew in advance), could only go out if they had checked with me, no opening the front door unless it was to family or their friends. If in doubt ring me first.

Eldest DD has been home alone since beginning of May as she is on exam leave, as she is now 16 the rules have been relaxed and today she had to answer the door 4 times this morning - postman, catalogue man, delivery and a canvaser. And pops out to the shops to buy lunch.

[livinginwonderland]

I was left home alone from around 12, with the proviso that I had to ring my mum when I got up and if I wanted to go out anywhere, even if it was just to my neighbours down the road or to the shop to get food. I loved it. My best friend came over a lot, and it was nice to just relax at home - I spent a lot of time sunbathing, watching Neighbours, playing on the computer and reading.

I was the type to hate organised activities so anything like that would have been my worst nightmare. They're old enough to be on their own (with rules in place) and it might give them a chance to explore the area a bit before they start school.

[ThresholdMum]

Thank you both, very helpful & reassuring, very grateful.

[tiredaftertwo]

Perhaps you could come up with a list with them of things to explore and do, and if you can, give them some cash to help them? Then you can talk to them each night about what they did. Try out the local cinema, swimming pool, perhaps a sports club or similar, the park. I think in the circumstances, I'd try to get them out of the house at least some of the time so they do start to feel it is their town, and also learn their way around and how to be independent while it is still holiday time with no deadlines or pressures.

[ThresholdMum]

Tiredaftertwo thats a really great idea. Like a scavenger hunt with some cash attached. They are very confident exploring where we live now, but actually its about them gaining confidence back in (smalltown) UK. Thanks so much

[ISingSoprano]

I was going to suggest some 'challenges' like getting to the cinema, leisure centre etc too! How will they get to their new school, is it walking distance or do they need to get the bus - could they try out the routes and see how long it takes?

[tiredaftertwo]

Glad you liked it! In that case, you could give them a budget and help them plan routes that will link together places and things to do (and nice picnic spots and cheap cafes), and get them going on public transport and understanding how the area fits together. Maybe they could draw a map with the places they have found on it (my older teens still like drawing maps of places they have been).

You could challenge them to find the best ice cream shop within 5 miles!

[ThresholdMum]

I love it! A bus map and a licence to wander. A challenge to find the best ice cream shop in 5 miles. Yes, that's it!

ISingSoprano we are currently appealing for school places, and then most likely onto waiting lists, so probably won't be clear till late August if then where they will be at school. Could be buses, could be bike rides away, but either way, the more confident the better.

thank you all so much, I feel so much more enthusiastic and empowered about the whole plan, - and think they will be too! Hope you have great summers too.

[ThresholdMum]

Am thinking challenges to pull from a jam jar...

[tiredaftertwo]

I can see you've got the bit between your teeth! If they are into that stuff, they could set up a little bloggy thing and put photos and write bits about what they find on it, to show you, and the rest of the family could admire....it would give them something constructive to do when their shoe leather wears out......I hope the move goes smoothly and you all settle in well.

[ThresholdMum]

Really great ideas. Yes a blog would be fun they'd like that. You could all set yourself up as consultants, 'out of ideas for a fun holiday?' We help you find your inspiration. Meet us in the nearest icecream shop.... Please pat yourselves on the back, one very happy mumsnetter. (Probably still some truculent tweens, but maybe thats only to be expected...)

[dinasaw]

Have they got bikes? As the summer goes on they could explore on bikes too and help with confidence dealing with uk roads if they have been abroad for a while. Look up cycle training courses in the area and see if they could do a course over the summer to help with road sense.
Can they go and find the local schools? It might help when they meet local kids for your kids to know where the local kids go to school?
I love the idea for the blog! Could they start planning family days out in the area for later in the year? Cost up theme parks and things the family could do?

[tiredaftertwo]

Yes, and collect vouchers for big days out. We're on a roll here!