I am at the end of my tether. I mean, really, seriously, cannot cope with this much longer.
DD14 has not been back to school properly at all since the Christmas hols.
At first it was because she kept being sick. This seemed to be because she was very worried about being sick in public (had norovirus just before xmas) and the worry would build up until she actually vomited. This only happened at home. She was able to go out as long as I was with her, but has not felt able to return to school full time. She has not vomited for about 3 weeks now.
The school has been great - they have said she can just attend her favourite lessons for the time being. But that isn't really working. For her, it is. But for me, not so much. I work from home and need to be able to plan my day but couldn't because I never knew which lessons she'd actually attend on any day.
Went back to talk to school and they have re-arranged seating plans in lessons for her, so she can sit with a friend; they have put her into a different set for 3 subjects so she can be with her friends; they have given her a card she can flash at the teacher to say she needs to leave the room if she feels unwell; they have even said she can drop one subject altogether.
I'm pretty sure there's nothing else they can do.
I have a short temper. I can go from happy-as-larry to raging anger in 3 seconds flat, but I've been holding it in as much as possible because I don't want to make things worse for her. Last night we had a long chat and we agreed she would try to go in for first lesson today and then play it by ear on a lesson-by-lesson basis and see if she could manage to stay at school for as long as possible.
In reality, she didn't even put her uniform on until 10:30am because she 'felt sick'. Then sat down and ate a chocolate bar.
I'm afraid my pent-up crossness escaped a bit and I said "What the FUCK am I supposed to do?!"
She got her uniform on about half an hour ago, but has now said she's not going in at all today because she feels like she might be sick.
She saw the doctor early January and he was quite unhelpful really. Taught her how to do proper deep breaths. Tested her for a few things (nothing physically wrong).
I can get very little work done (am self employed) and have lost almost a month now. I can't concentrate when she's here.
She thinks the only solution is to be home educated until the start of year 10. But it's more complicated than that, isn't it. She's been home educated before, during primary. But she's year 9 now, is choosing her options this week and wants to do her GCSEs. She won't be able to stay on the roll at school if she's home educated.
I don't know what to do, this has reduced me to tears a few times over the last month and I'm just stuck. I can't physically drag her to school (she's bigger than me for a start!) and I'm worried about what will happen. She's missing so much work and I'm worried I might end up being prosecuted for allowing her not to go in, even though the school are permitting this.
I'm going to go and ring the docs and see if I can get her another appointment for later today but I can't imagine what he will suggest - counselling I suppose, but waiting lists here are long in my experience and can't afford private.
Anyone been through anything similar?
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14 replies
OscarSwoosh · 04/02/2013 11:36
OP posts:
mindfulmum ·
09/02/2013 02:24
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