Went to bluewater and felt a scruff

[Bluebell79]

We finally went after wanting to go for years, was a special day out was expecting to buy loads, and came away with a pair of denim Shorts. I was going to buy a Michael kors bag but couldn't decide which type. The shoppers all looked so expensive and classy, felt like a scruffy harassed mother of 3. Did a bit of people watching while having lunch but still can't quite put my finger on it, I think being slim helps and i probably need to stop shopping in fat face. I have foot problems so have to wear fit flops, Havianas will leave me in pain, do we think I need to lose the cross body bags? What about nails? Should fingers be clear and glossy and colours just for toes? Have decided I need to grow my hair, currently growing out a short angled bob, could probablyy do with a trim, am colouring it each month to keep the greys covered. Anyone have anything to add?

[Shia]

Bloody hell! Last time I went to BlueWater, my dad was the smartest person there! We were surrounded by TOWIE types and my dad was quite taken aback by some of the sights he saw!

Looking smart has nothing to do with the latest fashions.

Groomed is the look I presume you're going for?

Understated and classy?

[Shia]

www.elegantwoman.org/personal-grooming.html

[Bluebell79]

Actually I do remember thinking a lady sounded like she was from Essex, I think that's close by, I'm a 2hr drive away so it's all new to me. Yes I think that's it, groomed, understated, classy, rich, posh. I was paying attention to the other mums they all seemed so calm and groomed. I need to go back and have another looks make notes.

[DamnIWishIWasYourLover]

I have a friend who fits that description, Bluebell.

Not quite sure how she does it, but no matter what she wears she looks great.

[sinisterfish]

i am sure you look fine op, it's a bit weird to dress up to a shopping mall isn't it? though i haven't been to bluewater, prefer to shop in west end in open air (or brent cross). is bluewater in essex? that would explain alot

[tiredandsadmum]

I live near Bluewater and it has gone downhill enormously since it opened. It was meant to be posh and lovely (think Sloane Street in a quarry). Mind you it doesn't stop me going there more than I should each month :)

[Doyouthinktheysaurus]

I went to Bluewater in shorts, t shirt and Birkenstocks, did I break the rules

Funnily enough I did notice some people very dressed up which just seemed odd to me. It was a roasting day as well, who wants to get dressed up to go shopping

I don't think I've ever looked groomed in my life, scruffy casual is more my style.

[Bluebell79]

My two nearest shopping destinations are full of Council estate types, groups of youths there's a good chance your bag will get snatched or the car damaged. Tend to shop online mostly, bluewater was very nice compared to what's available in the south.

Just read the link, quickly removed Barbie pink nail polish from fingers, and I wear flip flops day to day, apparently that's a no no.

[70isaLimitNotaTarget]

I've been going to Bluewater since 1999 (I was pg with DS the first time I went)
Nearer to Lakeside though .
I must admit, I always dress smarter for Bluewater - no rough jeans, I wear make-up, and just nicer than Lakeside clothes that I throw on
sinister Bluewater is Kent, not Essex.

(DD and I went there one day when a couple of TOWIE people were launching a new perfume. We walked by and were knocked bandy by the tidal wave of scent and the complete lack of customers )

Unlike Peter Andre who had queues of people wanting his autograph on the books/calender they'd paid £££ for

[CointreauVersial]

Bluewater thinks it's posh - they wouldn't let Primark in as it's too downmarket.

There were certainly a lot of TOWIE-types there last time I went (and a large and very loud group of Travellers), but plenty of casually dressed folk too. I love Bluewater and could spend the day there quite happily.

[thecatfromjapan]

I think that you have reached a turning point in your life: if life is a path/road we walk along, you have reached a widening of the road; a natural lay-by lies alongside,; there is a stream, trickling from a natural spring; someone has fashioned a shaded resting place. In short: you have reached one of those points in life where you are being prompted/invited to halt, and to think.

And Bluewater has been the place for this wonderful moment.

Don't laugh: it's serious, and there is a reason for it.

I think you have been a harassed mum-of-three for a while now. You've spent a lot of time thinking your way into the other people around you: what do they want? what do they need? how can I get it for them? You are probably very good at this now. The down-side is that you spend a lot of time doing that, and have only a fraction of the time doing that for you.

In Bluewater your eye was drawn to women who look the way you imagine yourself wanting to be in some way: calm; with time to consider their bodies, appearance, and clothes. It's very rarely just about the clothes, and most usually about self-nurturing and self-attention.

There would have been lots of women there, and your eye almost certainly singled out styles that you found attractive - and that would probably suit you.

I think the experience is telling you that life is now granting you the time, space and permission to start cherishing your self, and your body, a little bit.

Also, Barbie-pink nail varnish is pretty fashionable at the moment, so don't take it off too quickly! Coral is an easier-to-wear shade, and is a modern classic. YSL do a great "couture" range: I'd advise having a look at those and then going to buy the Boots matchy-matchy shade.

And lastly: I love, love, love Bluewater. Agree that it isn't quite as shiny as it was. I still love it, though.

[Chottie]

I love shopping in BW too. What isn't there to like?

Perhaps all of us who are BW fans should have a meet up there? :)

[JimmyCorkhill]

the catfromjapan what a lovely post

[ThisBitchIsResting]

What a lovely and wise post catfromjapan.

I love Bluewater and do dress up a bit to go there, not ott but I do plan what to wear as I have sometimes gone feeling scruffy and it has marred the trip a bit, as going in and out of nice clothes shops isn't much fun if the assistants are looking you up and down for the wrong reasons. And avoid taking kids at all costs. It's a real treat for me, I find it a really soothing place to walk around even when it's busy, it just smells nice and is nicely lit and spacious and there are clean loos and nice coffee and you don't have to rush. Love it. And that shop that sells only the chavviest designer stuff, it's my secret guilty pleasure.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

It's a shopping centre, has it really changed so much since it opened? I don't remember it being full of super groomed people and I used to go a lot

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Also worth remembering there will have been people looking at you and they will have been envious that you are a mother of 3 and envying your family unit, grass is always greener and all that

[PittTheYounger]

Agree fat face and white stuff are just horrendous shops

[PittTheYounger]

i am ROARING at Cat's spring

are you drunk cat?

[Lally112]

don't worry OP, i'll come stand next to you if it happens again. I will be the one in shitty farm overalls and wellies with eu de sheepshit wafting around. You will feel like youre on the red carpet.

[PittTheYounger]

I love that link to grooming

'Dirty fingernails are a rude shock, not to mention the harm to health.'

GASP

[Bluebell79]

thecatfromjapan that was a nice reply, my youngest starts school in sept and I'm looking forward to spending time on my own and having time to think about my appearance currently I'm always in a rush and end up grabbing the first clean thing! should have made more of an effort for bluewater and all the beautiful people there then I wouldn't have felt so rubbish.

[GhettoFabulous]

That website is hideous. You're not wearing makeup and you have hairy legs - I'm afraid I'm going to have to pass out!

[Selks]

It's only a shopping centre. You can wear what you want. There will be some glam people there, and some people who care not about being glam. Who cares? Why kept it affect how you feel about yourself? If you like fat face clothes and cross body bags that is just as valid as any other look. Just be yourself, OP.

[Selks]

'let it' affect...typo.

[Floralnomad]

I go to BW at least fortnightly and wear exactly what I would be usually wearing which is jeans and a t shirt ,I never wear make up anyway - I never feel out of place there . If you want a day out to buy designer stuff you need to go to Westfield at Shepherds Bush ,its much better.