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Need clothes .... major confidence crisis

15 replies

Daisyandrose · 27/07/2014 16:00

I often read threads where the op has lost confidence and think 'No, have confidence in your appearance, there are clothes to suit you'. Now it's my turn. I don't know why but I really have no idea what to wear any more. Could I have some help and advice please?

I'm 47 Shock, 5'6" or thereabouts, a size 10. Sounds okay on paper but in reality I'm a size 10 with a big tummy, legs which are thin (very) and shapeless (think sticks), upper arms I'd rather cover and feet sporting bunions, fungal toenails and misshapen toes. I paint a lovely picture, don't I?

I know I can dress well and that clothes, chosen well, hide a multitude of sins but I've simply lost direction. I need to buy some bits for holidays - trousers which aren't jeans, sandals, a swimsuit , a few tops and something to wear in the evening - say out to dinner but nothing OTT.

The other week I went out wearing navy Boden cropped trousers (this season, were quite popular on S&B but can't remember the name), a Seasalt navy and cream top and ballet flats. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and was really annoyed by how dumpy and frumpy I looked.

Shopping is mostly online though I may get to dept store this week although no time for a Personal shopper.

Can I please have advice about which way to turn, what styles and shapes will disguise tummy and legs and how to turn my frumpy Boden trousers into something trendier - I think they need a heel.

I usually shop from a mix of Gap, Boden, a couple of Seasalt pieces, CdeC, have a lovely Weekend by Max Mara jersey blazer from last year and some other reasonable bits but a few real holes in my wardrobe. I don't want dressy stuff, just everyday wear in shapes which flatter.

Thanks!

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Greengardenpixie · 27/07/2014 16:42

I am a about your age...Maybe your outfit described about was fine..just for me, i wouldnt wear the ballet flats as they would make me look dumpy with the crops. A wedge would have been better even a flat pair or flip flops to make your legs look longer.

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tethersend · 27/07/2014 18:30

What about some trousers like this or this with a top like this?

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tethersend · 27/07/2014 18:32

And shoes like this?

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Jubelteen · 27/07/2014 21:45

OP no advice sorry, I've also started a thread about being in a fashion rut.
Tethersend that's just the sort of trousers I'm looking for. I really like the sandals too, the heel height is just right. Sorry to hijack.

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nilbyname · 27/07/2014 21:54

Your outfit, although perfectly presentable sounds a bit boden yummy mummy! and like you'd shopped right off the page.

I rather like boden but give white stuff, joules, seasakt a wide berth as they are so so blah.

Try- cos, and other stories, selected femme, Vila, all saints, mint velvet

Blogs- Susiesoso, what I bought today, wearingittoday

Personal shopper at john Lewis would be a good idea?

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Daisyandrose · 27/07/2014 22:17

Thank you for taking the time to reply and link. I really like those trousers Tethers. What is And Other Stories sizing like - is a 10 a 10? Sandals are nice and look a good height - I'm best buying footwear in-store so will try to pick something up later this week. If I get heeled sandals are Birkies and absolute no to wear with jeans and crops? Need something comfortable and flat for daytime too.

Nilby ... Boden! Grin. I know, I know. I got a top from Cos last year and loved it (until it shrank in it's first wash!) but have to buy online and their website is terrible. So hard to judge clothes from the photos. Funny you should mention White Stuff - I don't have anything from there but they do,have okay lookimg, coloured, cropped casual trousers. Are they a no-no?

What about swimwear? My last swimsuit was Boden but I don't want a loud Bodenesque print. I'm not sure how to disguise my tummy but will link to a (too expensive) number I found last night - opinions appreciated.

Blogs are a great idea - why didn't I think of that? Will link to swimsuit and then go look at some blogs. Thanks all

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Daisyandrose · 27/07/2014 22:18
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Greengardenpixie · 27/07/2014 22:24

I love whitestuff crops!! NOTHING is a no no!! Dont be dictated too. You can buy basics and mix and match. I dont tend to do head to toe...i love white stuff and have things from other shops. I just mix it up a little.

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MotherBluestocking · 27/07/2014 23:31

Me & Em are quite expensive but do really well-cut basics. A lot of their pieces have ruching which you can adjust to cover/flatter problem areas.

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mysteryfairy · 28/07/2014 07:05

Have you read the bra threads on here. You shouldn't look dumpy at your height and dress size so just wondering if a better bra might help?

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Rockchick1984 · 28/07/2014 08:35

Re swimsuit - I knew I'd seen one almost identical to the one you linked here :)

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AnnDaloozier · 28/07/2014 08:36

Sort your toe nails out ew

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Daisyandrose · 28/07/2014 08:44

Thanks for the constructive comments! Hadn't thought of Me and Em so will definitely check it out. Will look at swimsuit link in a moment, thank you. Have well-fitted bras from specialist lingerie shop although having breastfed four children there is little hope!! Grin.

And toenails, Ann, I have tried to sort them out but can't take the prescription medication therefore I'm kinda stuck. Less of the ew, thanks! It's not my choice.

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QueenCardigan · 28/07/2014 09:03

I've got a very similar swimsuit to that from m&s. Won't link as their website gives me the rage Grin.

Crops, striped tee and ballet flats sounds like a lovely classic outfit but maybe you need to add in some colour or accessories to stop it looking frumpy/dull? What about coloured shoes or a necklace or coloured bag? Sometimes just these little things can add interest to an outfit to elevate it from frumpy to fabulous.

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PrimalLass · 28/07/2014 09:11

On holiday I wore a strapless tankini top in a bright colour and navy/black high-ish waist bottom. It felt less 'exposed' that an all-in-one.

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