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Step-parenting

livid!!

11 replies

alwaystryingtobeafriend · 27/07/2014 21:16

I am actually fed up of DPs ex affecting my life!

I know I moaned earlier in the week about how stressful a week I was having but we were supposed to get dsc yesterday lunch time so me and dp wait in to be told she would bring them today so a whole day yesterday was wasted hanging about them we have waited in all day today to be told they aren't coming until tomorrow now! Livid doesn't begin to cover it.

Me and dp were expecting the kids for 10 days out of 16 (I wasn't pleased but agreed.) But now I feel like 2 days have been wasted for me and dp because of her being a total dick!

Aibu?

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needaholidaynow · 27/07/2014 21:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alwaystryingtobeafriend · 27/07/2014 22:16

No other kids affected but it would have been nice to know! She is such a selfish witch in no way was she doing us a favour! Told dp to tell her she is to drop them 1st thing tomorrow or not at all as if we don't have themwe will go out for the day and have proper couple time - which right now is non existant due to hectic work loads.

I've almost calmed down !

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Elizabeth120914 · 28/07/2014 06:29

We have this loads after booking a course of swimming lessons for 8am on a Saturday- dsd is eleven and can't swim so only lesson available her mother decided she wouldn't bother get her up and she didn't want to come on the Friday when we went to collect her..!! Regularly we get dragged on all day and then she's busy it's just bloody fantastic I'd be fuming too not like u could do anything hanging around ..

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alwaystryingtobeafriend · 28/07/2014 09:19

That's so rubbish - waiting in tidY again as no time was agreed! If they ain't here for 11 in goin out and dp can hang around. In not hanging about for a 3rd day!

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DanaBarrett · 28/07/2014 10:56

We used to have this problem, there was one weekend she cancelled Friday, Saturday and Sunday, then insisted DH cancel his overtime on the Monday because DSD was more important! In the end he went to court and we generally get a little notice now!

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alwaystryingtobeafriend · 28/07/2014 11:35

See going to court is just too much money and hassle. All I want is for DP to make concrete arrangements ie tell her what time or ask her when she is dropping the kids off. It's not difficult?! DP can't be arsed with the arguing it will cause but FFS it's out holiday too. I went out because I knew I was in a foul mood and it's not fair on DP as I know he is just as frustrated but at te same time he doesn't bother so much as it's his children. I just about burst into tears last night for no reason other than rage at the fact 2 days had been wasted. So unreasonable but I am just so pissed. We could have gone away this weekend if we had known. Grrr!!!

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WakeyCakey45 · 28/07/2014 12:20

See going to court is just too much money and hassle. All I want is for DP to make concrete arrangements ie tell her what time or ask her when she is dropping the kids off. It's not difficult?!

Sadly, it appears that for some RP, it is difficult. Is she determined to be awkward, or does she just live one of those lifestyles which means they are never on time for anything? Are the kids often late for school or absent?

I tend to agree with you; a court order won't make any difference - and it'll be one enforcement hearing after another if she carries on as she is now once a court order is in place.

I think you might have to detach a bit and make your own plans without your DP on the days the DSC are due to arrive - he can wait in on his own for them while your out with friends or shopping!

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ChiefBillyNacho · 28/07/2014 12:36

Are there clear plans confirmed in writing? I've had this with xh phoning up asking where dd is. Truth was I'd asked him 3 times if he wanted her for the day and he didn't reply. I was apparently to assume that he would (despite only 2 weeks earlier saying he wouldn't be my "childcare". Not saying your dp is like that - but I've found that firm email or text arrangements helps.

Why don't you just go and collect her?

Unfortunately if there is an ex hellbent on making things difficult over contact, the only way to go us court. You can self represent. But if its too much hassle then you're going to have to put up with this and try to get things on a better footing with his ex.

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alwaystryingtobeafriend · 28/07/2014 12:41

Te ex is just being difficult and lazy as usual. It normally wouldn't bother me but it's the fact there were previous arrangements an they hange to suit her. Me and DP would really benefit from some time just the 2 of us and I know it's selfish of me. But had we known we could have been away for a couple of days. It's just bloody infuriating.

She doesn't make contact difficult it's just her being difficult. I don't speak to the ex because she refused point blank to acknowledge me so I have settled for this. I don't like doing thigs without DP especially on our holidays. Holidays are about being together. I just hate inconsiderate selfish people.

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ChiefBillyNacho · 28/07/2014 12:49

I'm not sure why she is being lazy. And she's only difficult if they had an agreement that she's gone back on.

Why doesn't he go and get her?

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alwaystryingtobeafriend · 28/07/2014 14:49

She's lazy because she would rather lie in her bed than get up and get the kid ready. We always do most of the runni around so he will be waiting for DP to say he is going for the kids but it's up other to drop them off. Anyway it was a rant over nothing but we eventually found out they are coming today about 4- DP reluctantly txt her. Would have been another wasted day if he hadn't! Pah! Onwards an upwards. Xx

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