I love my kids

(63 Posts)

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ShesYourDaughter Wed 25-Dec-13 23:29:35

There is so much special you share with your own flesh and blood it is a very precious thing!

Much as I'd like the same to be true between my own kids and hers, it's hard to see it as a comparison between two sets of ideals.

My kids eat well, do well at school, one's at uni the other on the way. Both rounded kids I love to be around them for their perspective and their insight into their own world.

My partners kids are so different, take the oldest one getting on for 16 and she has some sort of crisis if she's near a calorie or away from a reflective surface for more than five minutes or nobody mentions how she looks.

I find this really difficult, my own daughter is a good looking girl. She doesn't do the plaster work and she looks like a naturally good looking girl. I can't look at my DP s daughter with layers of foundation on and know who she is under there.

I have no idea what makes her tick, scarily it seems to be vanity and her school circle seems to be changing to reflect that. She seems to be in some kind of fantasy world where she will become a footballers wife, or famous hanger on.

She has no idea of the reality of professional football or the small town where we live.

She's doing ok st school, capable of so much more but has her plan all ready so no need for be an individual when she can reach the giddy heights of non stardom to which she aspires.

Is there any smell the coffee cure? Other than her sister showing her how it shoul be done?

vichill Wed 25-Dec-13 23:31:48

Have you been drinking?

TwattyBojangles Wed 25-Dec-13 23:34:07

This is a pretty nasty post.

As an adult, you should surely know that everyone is different. Your children are not 'better' (despite what you clearly think), they are just different to your step daughter.

She is probably aware of your feelings about her, and this certainly won't be filling her with confidence around you.

catinboots Wed 25-Dec-13 23:35:55

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TwattyBojangles Wed 25-Dec-13 23:36:59

Or what cat said.

perplexedpirate Wed 25-Dec-13 23:44:28

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thornrose Wed 25-Dec-13 23:48:48

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Ledkr Wed 25-Dec-13 23:51:50

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MonsterMunchMe Wed 25-Dec-13 23:53:14

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lunar1 Wed 25-Dec-13 23:57:14

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JaquelineHyde Thu 26-Dec-13 00:07:03

Oh WOW you really are a piece of work.

Merry fucking Christmas.

Beccawoo Thu 26-Dec-13 08:55:50

Hi She's,
sorry about the abuse you've received above, but if you read your post, you do sound very thoughtless! No one child is 'better' than another, they are all different! As an ex teacher I know exactly the sort of behaviour you say your dsd is displaying, but your role as a parent is to support her, not try to make her feel bad by going on about how wonderful and how much better your dd is. If she is doing fine at school, then just encourage her to keep going and work hard. So what if she likes makeup and has vain friends? Supportive parents who take an interest, not scold and compare, are what teenagers need.

ReluctantStepMum Thu 26-Dec-13 14:55:14

I am astounded at the cruel comments on here! OP has been open and honest, only to be beaten down by some stupid vindictive women. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and unless you live there, you should not make such strong judgements. OP, most teens today are up their own backside. I talk from experience. I will post in more detail later, but am about to go out.

FrogStarandRoses Thu 26-Dec-13 16:40:38

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purpleroses Thu 26-Dec-13 17:22:49

The OP refers to "my own kids or hers" so I'd assume they're a man or a gay woman.
I'm not surprised he's had a hostile reaction as he's not complaining about some specific behaviour that's hard to deal with but sounding as if he detests every aspect of the poor DSD. sad

elliebellys Thu 26-Dec-13 19:25:50

The whole post is awful.every child is different thank god..seems that no matter what she does,bottom line is he doesnt want to see any positive traits in her.

Eliza22 Thu 26-Dec-13 19:42:15

There's massive pressure on young girls now to look "beautiful" and let's face it, we're not all blessed with natural good looks. I was 20+ when I started tentatively wearing mascara. My sister was the one who was blessed with stunning, traffic stopping face & figure. Look at what happened recently in the jungle where the Olympic swimmer was crushed because she didn't look like the model... Ridiculous. But that's society now and the reality for young girls.

The OP sounds like a judgemental eejit who's had too much alcohol over Christmas. I'm glad he's not MY stepdad or partner.

Aroundtheworldandback Thu 26-Dec-13 20:02:44

My dd16 probably wears too much make up, cares too much about her clothes, image etc and is certainly not too of the class but you know what? She's a kind, generous person, a true friend to her friends. And guess what? Her stepdad adores her, as do I.

Aroundtheworldandback Thu 26-Dec-13 20:04:24

That should be top of the class

cantheyseeme Thu 26-Dec-13 20:06:31

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elliebellys Thu 26-Dec-13 22:46:52

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ReluctantStepMum Fri 27-Dec-13 00:15:22

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SillyMillyOnAHilly Fri 27-Dec-13 00:27:30

I have reported this thread. I hope it gets deleted. So nasty.

ReluctantStepMum Fri 27-Dec-13 00:34:44

What an over reaction, pathetic really. The OP post is ok, it's the horrible comments made afterwards which are scum. Get a damn life Silly.

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