DSD's and New baby

[pinkbear82]

My dp has 2 dd from previous relationship. lovely girls and we see them regularly.
dp and I have just had a dd of our own - 11 days old.
dsd were around yesterday and we had a hard job getting them to realise she isn't a dolly that can be picked up and played with all the time.

just had dp ex on the phone saying youngest (6) is upset as didn't get to
hold baby as much as eldest (8). ex isn't happy about New baby and has caused countless silly issues but that's a different story

the dsd took it in turns and both had time with baby - I'm feeling a bit sensitive over it and don't really know what to do - any words of wisdom from you Wise people who have been through this?!

[Smartiepants79]

The girls are old enough (especially) the eldest to understand she is not a toy! Even my 2 year old knows that about her baby sister.
It is lovely that they are so interested and want to spend time with her and I would suggest you try not to discourage that.
Is this your own first baby?
Set some ground rules for them holding her. - they must be sitting down, you or DP must be next to them...
Keep repeating how little she is and how gentle they need to be.
Praise when they do it well 'what a wonderful big sister you are'
Maybe take them one at a time to a different room to spend some one on one time with her.
Two things to remember,

1. Babies are tougher than they look
   
2. The interest in her will wane as the novelty wears off!
   

Try and enjoy this special time with ALL your family.

[welshfirsttimemummy]

I have a DSD who is 5 and a DS who is a month old, she absolutely adores DS bit it's hard to stop her almost smothering him! She wants to kiss him and cuddle him all the time so it must be hard when there are 2 children wanting to do it!

Just remember its all a novelty and new at the moment, the minute your DC is stealing there stuff and annoying them they will be happy for the other to entertain them

And just ignore their mum that will settle down too

[pinkbear82]

thank you for being so lovely.

yes dd is my first - think I probably feel very protective of her!

you are of course both right and the novelty will wear off and I just need to remember that.

thank you again

[Smartiepants79]

Of course you feel protective, she is still very new and tiny!
As you feel more confident and settled the anxiety will ease.
This is only a very short period in your lives but the girls will be sisters forever.
Be firm in how you expect them to treat her when she is little but it is good that they love her, don't loose sight of that!

[pinkbear82]

you are right smartie - and it's only natural for dsd's to be excited too. they have waited 'forever' for their sister to arrive!

think dp and I need to have a chat about what we are happy with and then chat with the girls about it. And maybe come up with roles each girl
could have and swap them round
each week - (to be honest they need to get better at sharing and working together to achieve things so this may be an ideal way of encouraging that)

thank you Again you have helped me focus on the positives much more.