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Step-parenting

Other names for step dads

11 replies

charitymum · 20/01/2013 23:30

My DDs love my DP and live half week with us and our DSs. They also love their wonderful dad with whom the live other half of week in very happy shared residency. Ex and DP get on.

DDs want a special work for DP. They hate step dad-or anything with dad in it - as they feel it belittles their dad's position. They happy calling him by name but when describing him to others they want a word that belongs to them rather than mummy's partner. They see him as family and him them.

Any ideas?

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charitymum · 20/01/2013 23:31

Word-they want a special word ....

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HerRoyalNotness · 20/01/2013 23:39

All I can think of is "papa dp name", like papa John, papa pete etc

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HerRoyalNotness · 20/01/2013 23:40

Or are you thinking more a nickname? Does he have a family one that his siblings/parents called him that thy can use?

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charitymum · 21/01/2013 00:20

No unfortunately not. Like the idea of something in another language - nothing that means dad though. The DD very sensitive to that. This came up because some crass health care worker told them that DP could not sign for treatment of fracture because he not a relative. We've dealt with that but the worker said an uncle-who they see twice a year-was a closer relative than DP who they have lived with for years. Left them wanting someway of making the closeness of their relationship clear.

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KumquatMae · 21/01/2013 00:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toddle · 21/01/2013 00:41

A friends children call theirs steppy.

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purpleroses · 21/01/2013 11:11

My DD's friend just refers to both her dad and stepdad as "dad" - much as most kids do with their two grannies or granddads. If she needs to make it clear which one she's talking about she'll say "daddy- [name of dad]" or "daddy [name of stepdad]". It seems to work for her, though I'm aware the issue can be a bit of a minefield if your.

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GoldPlatedNineDoors · 21/01/2013 11:17

I like Steppy. Also, Pops.

What about a totally unrelated nickname - Chip or something?

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purpleroses · 21/01/2013 11:19

Sorry - posted too soon - I meant to say it can be a minefield if your ex does feel that his position is threatened by his DD calling anyone else a variant of dad. It's also the case that if she refers to him as anything other than "my stepdad" other people may well assume he is her dad, which could cause confusion - eg someone in school playground speaks to her dad, doesn't realise who he is and refers to her stepdad as her dad.

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flurp · 21/01/2013 11:49

We just use first names here but we have no choice because DPs first name is the same as my kids' dad and I have the same first name as DP's sister.
They have always referred to him as Mum's boyfriend and I am Dad's girlfriend to outsiders and they are happy with that.
My dad used to get really upset if I referred to him as my 'real dad' when describing him. He used to say he was the ONLY dad and there shouldn't have been a distinction between him and the stepdad.

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SignoraStronza · 22/01/2013 12:02

My dc (6) calls dh the diminutive firm of his name - she adds a -y to the end. She is the ONLY one allowed to call him that. She refers to him as her dad though and sometimes calls him that too. More so now that dc2 is here.

Her bio father is foreign and she calls him 'Papa'.

DC has figured this out for herself though and proudly tells people she has two dads. Grin (Although dh is the only one who fulfils this role properly tbh).

When she comes back from seeing Papa she is often confused though, as he likes to put her straight. Sad

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