My DP and I have two "children" between us. His DD is a grown woman, mine is a pre-teen and lives with me. His DD lives with him!! We are planning to move in together in the next year and hopefully get married but his DD won't be part of the living arrangements - I should say at his insistence, not mine.
My DD means everything to me and I put everything into my relationship with her to make sure she is polite, well-adjusted, has access to a good education and just generally try to help her make the best decisions. All I want for her is to be given opportunities to be the best person she can be so she can go off on her own life journey when she leaves school. Generally speaking, she's a good child, clever, respectful, funny and nice to be around. She is, however going through puberty and her personality can do a back-flip overnight turning her into a screaming banshee and it's hard to put up with. Thankfully it's the exception rather than the rule!
The problem is my DP doesn't seem able to say anything positive about my DD but quickly jumps on the bandwagon if I mention that she's being particularly difficult. I assume he compares our two children who have had completely different upbringings with different family scenarios. His DD is a product of that upbringing and I am sure he and his ex-P did their best. She's not a bad girl, she's funny, warm and engaging but is a low achiever mainly as daddy always picks her up and sorts everything out when it all goes wrong.
My DD just come 3rd in her whole year in the end of terms exams and is absolutely delighted, as am I. The only response I got from DP was that she should have come 1st given the money I pay for her school.
It's not the first time I've noticed his attitude and I am going to discuss it with him but not sure how to tackle it. He's good at denial but my gut tells me I need to resolve it before I put more into our relationship. I would say I love him very much and we are very compatible if it wasn't for this one problem. Unfortunately, it's not one I'm prepared to compromise on and I shouldn't have to avoid telling things because he's resentful and jealous.
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Step-parenting
DOES MY FUTURE DH RESENT MY DAUGHTER?
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ItsRainingOutside · 27/11/2012 13:43
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