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Using a pushchair for walking refusals

26 replies

Housesoftheholy · 16/07/2014 10:26

Can I ask others opinions on this please as I feel unsure what to do for the best.

Ds is 4 nearly 5 and a very big lad. We are having regular episodes of walking refusal. For lots of different reasons, tiredness, unfamiliar places, meltdowns etc.

He gets very tired and I daren't walk anywhere now due to the possibility of a refusal to walk.

I'm a single parent and have joint problems due to a condition I suffer and I keep ending up carrying him which is playing havoc with my joint and back.

Am I going to make things worse if I get a pushchair? I feel it would help but don't want to make ds lazy?

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autumnsmum · 16/07/2014 10:35

Hi houses I still regularly use a pushchair for my dd who is the same age , I don't have health problems but if she flops to the floor and refuses to walk I can't lift her , if I didn't use the buggy I would be scared to leave the house

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TigerLightBurning · 16/07/2014 10:36

Maybe try and borrow one. He might refuse to go in the pushchair too. Those big pushchairs are expensive.
Do you tell him where you are going and why and when it will be over? Use visuals maybe?
Have you asked him if he wants a pushchair? Is there a physical reason why he wouldn't be able to walk short distances?

We found that communication was the key and maybe some treats and things to look forward to. If he didn't get why he had to go somewhere he was reluctant. Of course even after understanding they might not want to.

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PolterGoose · 16/07/2014 10:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Housesoftheholy · 16/07/2014 14:48

Thanks for replies Smile Good to hear others experiences.

Tiger I use do use visual supports and that helps him move from one thing to another but he is still very impulsive and self directed!

He does get especially tired and suffers from sensory overload. I know he would love to go in it (a lot, partly what worries me!) I've borrowed a small pushchair recently an although it was definitely to small for him he loved and it was much easier.

I think i am going to get one. I don't know whether to see if the paed will help. autumn is yours a sn pushchair?

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autumnsmum · 16/07/2014 14:56

Hi houses I've got two ,a cheapy mothercare one and a jane power twin from eBay , I've got a feeling your ds would possibly qualify for a mac major from wheelchair services , both of mine are non sn pushchairs

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Housesoftheholy · 16/07/2014 15:04

Thanks autumn. I have tried to call our paed but she has been off sick on and off for months, so it would be sloooww.

This is a whole other thread but does anyone know how/who I ask to be seen by the other paed in our area?

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Sirzy · 16/07/2014 15:09

would he scoot or go on a bike (perhaps with some sort of handle you can direct him with?). Otherwise I would go for a buggy, even if just there to use if needed (and carry the shopping!)

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autumnsmum · 16/07/2014 15:16

Could you call the hospital or cdc and ask directly ? You could always say that you'd like a fresh opinion on ds , quick disclaimer I've not had to change paed

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TigerLightBurning · 16/07/2014 16:21

You could try going through your gp. They should be able to refer you.

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ouryve · 16/07/2014 19:22

I'm in the same situation, but a few years on. You reach the stage when you can't keep on carrying them. And you should take steps to stop injuring yourself, now.

DS2 weaned out of his Mac Major when he was about 6, after I worked with him to slowly build up his stamina. We had to start using it for school walks again, when he was 7.5, because he was getting overwhelmed by ritualistic behaviours on the way home from school and I really was hurting myself trying to get him home and keep up with DS1 and keep them both safe. He decided he'd had enough of it after about 6 months, though. It's still now always plain sailing, but at least he walks, now, even if it is backwards, on some days!

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ouryve · 16/07/2014 19:25

not always plain sailing!

I have LD CAMHS involved to help me to work through this, in fact.

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Housesoftheholy · 16/07/2014 21:10

Thank you for your experience ouryve. I think you are right best to protect myself now and work with him through whatever difficulties he is having whilst being able to keep us both safe. He needs to build up stamina too and uses all his energy up in bursts of frantic hyperactivity and then is burnt out.

Hope things continue to move in the right direction (no pun intended!)

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ouryve · 16/07/2014 23:20

We've had 3 consecutive walks facing mostly forward - though one of them was with his nose in a bag of lego wheels he'd fished out from behind a radiator :o

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Babieseverywhere · 17/07/2014 07:47

I was putting my nearly 6 yo in our Phil and Teds up to a few weeks ago. It is helpful depending on the destination. When using it to transport my DS to school (he hates school) it did mean we got there quicker but he would scream and try and get out as he didn't want to be taken to school.

So we are currently using the very slow. Waiting until he is ready to cross road method now. ..very slow but means things remain quiet as he has some control.

But if sounds like your child wants to use a buggy, so you should have a more positive experience.

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Jacksterbear · 17/07/2014 09:21

I don't know if this would work for you houses but my 7yo ds has a maxi micro scooter and when he is tired or refusing to walk (which is often) he stands on it with both feet, hangs on to my arm with one arm and I pull him along. We do entire school runs like this (usually with me also pushing 3yo dd in a buggy too).

Until recently he would occasionally still go in dd's buggy, but recently he has become much more self-conscious about being different so don't think he would use it now.

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NoMoreParades · 17/07/2014 09:26

Apply to the Family Fund op, they would likely help fund a bigger/an pushchair.

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NoMoreParades · 17/07/2014 09:28

sn*

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Housesoftheholy · 17/07/2014 19:44

How long do the family find take to process applications NoMore?

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Housesoftheholy · 17/07/2014 21:00

Thanks jackster and sirzy too. I don't think the scooter would work for us in a lot of our situations. He has a mini micro and will only really scoot when with another child or in the park. Also sometimes he is not walking because he is freaked out or something and wouldn't let me push him either on it either as he wants wrapping up. I could see with a maxi micro I'd end up carrying that and him!

Babies my dm pointed I am best not to try and put him in a pushchair mid meltdown if he does not want to get in as he tends to try to hurt me or gets hold of handfuls of my hair in that state. So I'd be in prime position for an attack then! But I think generally he would be happy to go in before he hits meltdown.

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AgnesDiPesto · 17/07/2014 22:23

Ask your health visitor or go to refer you to wheelchair services / OT for Mac Major. We got one quickly no problem. We used it until DS was about 6, then did some ABA walking programmes with him. He used to go in it to school as he was too slow to get there with his brothers otherwise and then on way home he would sometimes go in it if he felt overwhelmed. We practised walking at other times when it wasn't so crucial. We gradually used it less and less. First holiday without a buggy felt really brave (DS was nearly 7 by then). It was DS sanctuary for a long time and meant we could go to cafés and supermarkets (I would push a small trolley in front of me with one hand and pull the buggy behind me with the other!). He would sit in it with an iPad, I looked like the worst mum in the world letting an oversized child watch a screen all round the store, but hey it got the shopping done. DH has bad back and often aggravates it picking up DS so it's not worth it. At 4/5 we used it a lot.

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TigerLightBurning · 18/07/2014 01:02

Those disabled child trolleys you get in some supermarkets are brilliant. We used one for a while but he can walk around with us now with the occasional sprint off.

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NoMoreParades · 19/07/2014 11:39

Sorry Houses I don't know how long, I'm just about to do the application myself, also for a pushchair. But in many areas the waiting list for an OT appt is 6 months or more, then you have to be referred around a bit more before you get anywhere.
Could you ring the family fund and ask?
www.familyfund.org.uk/

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Housesoftheholy · 20/07/2014 12:53

Sorry I'd not been back to this my internet was knocked out in the storms for couple of days. All your responses so helpful thanks. Don't think I can wait for a family fund application I've waited too long already!

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Firsttimer7259 · 20/07/2014 17:59

We got McLaren major in under 2 weeks ot at sn nursery sent application, nhs dropped it off at home. She was just over 15 kgs and can walk just won't be guided. We do practice going for walks but never far from home - no idea what we'll do once she grows out of it but have some way to go yet

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Housesoftheholy · 21/07/2014 12:37

Thanks for your advice everyone Smile. The paed phoned to say she has referred us to wheel chair services for a maclaren major. She totally agrees that we need one.

So relieved, just wish I'd got referred a year ago. But I didn't even know it was an option then. The relevant people don't seem to tell you these things are available until you ask

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