Why are some people against special schools?

[adrianna22]

.....especially at a young age.

I was talking to a mum who has a child with ASD, and I was talking to her and then she began to say that when her DS was young "...he did not go to a special school, he has loads of friends now" etc. I was struck at the bit when she said about the special school, so I began to tell her that I want my four year old DS to go to a special school and her face was in disgust.

She was like "no way, he is too young, wait a bit his language will get better, special school is not needed, it's just a language- disorder delay he will get better" and I began to question her that is it "earlier to get the help as much as possible" but there was no way she would change her mind about special schools...then back to her DS she said that he was going to attend a special school when he starts high school and I just gave a (Hmmmm) look.

I don't know, is DS too young to go to a special school? Or maybe I should wait a bit as everyone is so against it.

[billiejeanbob]

ime people tend to be more reluctant to send their children to secondary special schools due to the restriction of exams, GCSEs available etc.

Also special schools tend to cater for a wide range of needs - asd, LDs, BESD, ADHD etc and parents may be concerned about appropriate peer group.
specialist provison on the other hand tend to be much more needs specific and so provides an appropriate peer group.
I think that primary ss are fab - small class sizes and high adult ratio plus opportunities for therapies etc.
I am reluctant for my dd to attend our local secondary ss as she has average ability but complex SEN. so she has the ability to take GCSEs etc but the ss doesnt cater for this. plus dd is very sensory and easily distracted and I worry that outbursts from the other sensory children will upset her and cause her to meltdown.

[adrianna22]

Hi

I want DS to go to a specialist school than a provision.

I didn't think her sending her DS to a specialist high school was bad. I was just a bit confused as she was so against sending DS to a special school, when she is sending her child to a specialist high school. It was a bit ironic.

[autumnsmum]

I love my dds special school, she has made amazing progress and the staff can't do enough for her

[Flywheel]

It's a very emotive topic for those who have to make thedecision. A bit like a breast feeding debate or wohm vs sahm. People sometimes see others making different choices as a criticism of their choice, rather than respecting that every child / family situation is unique with no single right choice.
My dd is in a special school. I never really questioned the decision for her. She would not function at all in a mainstream environment. I still remember crying in the car on the way home from a party, where other parents were questioning my decision, and implied I was letting her down. Their kids all had sn too, but higher functioning. The ds of the most vociferous objected ended up joining my dd in the special school a couple of years later.
Even when special school is the right choice, I think it can be hard for parents to come to terms with.
You will know what is right for your son. I strongly believe special schools have their place. Integration is wonderful too, when properly resourced, and for the right child. One size will not fit all.

[magso]

I think it depends both on the individual child's needs and the quality and abilty of the local schools to match those needs.
Ds started in MS because we had no choice - he was turned down for a statement, so had to start school with no support, at our village infants that had an excellent reputation for supporting sn. He was almost nonverbal on starting school and globally delayed, but the LEA thought he did not warrant a statement! At 7 he had acquired a statement and a whole list of complex DXs aswell as some very distressed behaviour and moved to an excellent SS. I will say that his language came on well whilst in ms, and as a result of attending our village school he is recognised by many of the local children, who now years later recognise his vulnerabilities. He has SLD with ASD, so really was not coping in ms. The down side is that his progress in all other areas regressed, because he was not getting the support he needed- before school he had had virtually 1:1 at almost all times. Although autistic ds enjoys company so possibly managed better than other children with similar difficulties in ms. SS was brilliant for him and he started to recover long lost skills. He will never get back those lost years! The down side of SS varie on the school. Academic expectations can be very low, which can be unsuitable for a more able child. Copying other behaviours and the mis match between children with different needs can be difficult. Ds is mostly a sensory seeker so like hugging others but for instance his touchy freely was very upsetting for the sensory sensitive of other astistic children - and neither could understand the other well! Some of the children who had started in SS at 3 seemed so much further advanced for having had those early years of support even though ds difficulties were perhaps less obvious at 3. A few moved to MS.

[LuvMyBoyz]

Success after school has been shown to be much reduced if you went to Special School. That's why professionals suggest it as a last resort. Even knowing this, I chose Special provision for my DS. No-one has ever looked disgusted when I told them but sometimes the ill- placed pity has been very hard to take.

[TigerLightBurning]

Personally I thought about ss but wanted to give ms a try first as he is a very bright boy and the ss was for MLD. I was/am against the ms pushing us towards a SS before he had been there a term. Anyway so far so good. It is good to know there is an alternative but not if it gives the MS an excuse not to try and make it work first.

[lougle]

Most people generalise one experience/story/anecdote. This works both ways, but then numbers in ss are much lower and the profile of children in ss is generally lower from the get-go, which leads to a bit of a circular argument.

Most people whose children have a 'pure' learning difficulty (by 'pure' I mean all milestones meet in toddlerhood but very slow academic progress) would want them to continue in MS because their social skills are unaffected so they identify best with children with typical development.

Many people believe that who you spend your time with can be 'catching' and they'd rather their child child 'caught' the skills of more able children and became more like them.

I wanted dd1 to get the very best expertise possible to help her thrive in education. I wanted her to be taught by people who have chosen to spend their time helping children like her be the best they can be, rather than by people who are 'doing their best' or 'trying so hard' or who feel that they are having to accommodate her.

I wanted dd1 to grow up with friends -genuine friends who wouldn't speak to her with a motherly voice because they are being 'kind'.

I wanted her to grow up knowing that she's not the only girl like her and that there are some children more able than her and some who are less able.

I wanted her to be in an environment where she is challenged to do her best and isn't written off as 'the kid with SN'.

So, for her, I chose the best special school in the country (in my humble opinion).

[adrianna22]

Thanks guys, I now understand. I just have to brush off her views.

Lougle Your points sums up exactly why I want DS to go to a specialised provision. If you don't mind me asking, what school does your DD go to? As I would like to look it up.

[adrianna22]

Luvmyboyz I didn't know " Success after school has been shown to be much reduced if you went to Special School ". Why do they think that?

[catgirl80]

I think it's an individual session. We tried special school and I felt it held my DS back BUT we were very lucky in that our alternative is a 65 pupil primary school with classes of less than 18/19 children and DS gets full time one to one support and ABA. I have to say that he has made tonnes of progress socially as a result of learning behaviour from neuro typical children and he is very popular with his peers and will now instigate play rather than playing on his own. We had problems with the special school - they said he had positive role models there but it my experience it was no substitute for him learning from peers. I actually found that his mainstream school looked in real detail at what makes him tick and have adapted their approach to suit him but the special school had their strategies that they were overconfident in and as a result they would not look past the end of their noses often. They denied my son support he needed by telling a behaviourist point blank that he did not have ADHD when he actually was found to have moderate to severe ADHD when he finally saw a psychiatrist. It delayed the diagnosis by over 6 months.

[lougle]

It's true that a child in SS may seem less 'severe' against the background of their cohort than if they were in MS. It can also be the car that school methods/structure can be effective enough that a child may present as less 'active' there. DD1's teacher took her out for the day once and saw her completely differently than at school because the structure of the school environment was gone.

Whether that is a good thing or a bad thing is debatable.

[adrianna22]

Catgirl- Thanks for telling me your experience.

You are very lucky as DS local primary school has 30 kids in every class! and only one TA.

Though, considering DS's severe language delay, I feel like his needs would not be met in a MS setting of 30 kids and one class. Though saying that, I did see a specialist provision, that would tick some of my boxes. But when viewing the provision, I realised that it wasn't right for DS. So I learnt regardless of whether it's a mainstream or special setting, it's about finding the right school for our kids.

There is a special school, ICAN meath school, that I really want DS to go to. But I'll doubt he will get in.

How did you get one to one ABA therapy full time?

[adrianna22]

Lougle, just had a look at the school. Thanks for telling me the name. It's very far from me. But it looks like a really good school, from their website.

[lougle]

Copying happens but it's usually short-lived. It happens with Ms kids in MS schools too!

[ouryve]

I'm not aggainst SSs, but they haven't been the best option for my boys, up until now. There were no appropriate SS options for DS1 until year 5 - and that's an Indie that I had to do the usual song and dance routine for. MS (very inclusive and with good support) has been very difficult for him. In half a term at his new school, his attitude to school has changed completely. He can't wait to get out of the house in the morning, which is a real novelty!

If there had been a school that met his social and academic needs before year 5, I'd have had him in it.

DS2 is thriving in MS, despite having quite severe needs, but that's because he has excellent 1:1 support. He will be in SS for secondary, as he's still on P levels in year 3. The two most local offerings haven't wowed me, though, for various reasons. There's another school within the LA that has a stronger reputation for ASD, plus an Indy school set up in partnership with the LA for children with ASD and, typically, severely LDs, which I will be having a look at, when the time comes.

[ouryve]

And yes, DS1 displayed a bit of copied behaviour, this weekend. We said "I beg your pardon" and he hasn't said it since!

Copying is also happening in a nice way, too. He's currently in a class of 7, and the boys typically have AS, ASD and/or ADHD and all have anxiety and sensory processing difficulties in common. He's started with some self-soothing behaviours that he's picked up from the other boys - much more unobtrusive ones such as balancing an object on his head, rather than standing on his head, which his his natural stress response. He's also learning that, if boys with similar difficulties to his can manage to do certain things, there's no reason why he can't, either.

For benefits like that, I can deal with a 10yo expressing himself somewhat robustly in conversation!

[TheSporkforeatingkyriarchy]

I think a lot of people presume that with various legislation and that that any needs will be met in the mainstream. I've even had local medical professionals try to discuss and make such presumptions that all state primaries would have everything my eldest needed (he was also in for speech/communication concerns) and it all would be made accessible because of such things and doing something other than mainstream was isolating/coddling/going to cause more problems and so on. I don't think most people realize how hard it is to get many things unless they're directly involved and have a lot of old biases attached. As a disabled adult, I find that many people presume that legislation is a magic wand of accessibility which can be very frustrating to try to explain how much of a barrier still exists in mainstream areas.

I've found many parents around here crow when they can get their kids into the special school, particularly at secondary, but that may just be my social circle (and the state of mainstream inclusion around here, which is pretty bad here).

[Bilberry]

We wanted a specialist language unit because they take a different approach to the curriculum to ms. The usual way of teaching reading, writing and maths would be very difficult for my ds until his speech and language improves, eg. there is a lot of emphasis on mental maths which turns maths into a language activity. We actually also wanted a different base to the one he got into as this one he is based in a ms class and 'goes out' for help which I feel excludes him more. The other unit had a whole mixed age class which I feel would give him more confidence to make friends. Unfortunately we had to take what we were offered.

[autumnsmum]

I love dd2s sp sch I was also sent to view some autism resourced provisions which were dire , pecs for everyone whereas in sp sch they are working with dd on her speech , we sent dd to a ms nursery for a year and although they really tried I ended up having to collect her early every session

[hattytheherald]

We had son in ms indie school til year 2 but it was obvious by then that even small classes and 1:1 he wasn't going to cope. I feel we were bullied into a "specialist" unit attached to a mainstream. They were not included and seemed to have very little autism knowledge. This then made us look at ss but felt all of them wrote them off meaning they didn't offer gsce's etc. I wanted somewhere my son could reach HIS potential and so now he is at a indie ss that caters for autism. The strangest thing is that he is really happy to be amongst his own kind ifl. He often asks if an activity is just for autistic people and seems let down if we say no. So for us it was a hard decision and I think based on the fact that a lot of children who attend ss don't seem to really progress much and that was far from what we wanted. However for me if you'd have asked the question at reception age (he's now year 4) I think I would have said no to ss as maybe the distance between peers wasn't quite so obvious and I wanted to give him a chance. It's a hard choice but overall it's what's best for each individual child. Some need it earlier and some can manage for a bit and here the places in ss are like gold dust.