what to do?

[oililymad]

hi my son has an x linked gentic disorder.
he has a lot of very autustic traits and severe anxieties. this makes school difficult.he has some physical diffculties (mild) that makes his muscle tone low and his joints very bendy. he wears piedro boots.
he has limited social skills and i went on a school trip recently and i did not see him interact or look at another child for the whole time.
he loves adults and will talk endlessly about his favourite subject but doeasnt appear to have good skills when dealing with his peers.
his biggest issue is his anxiety and sometimes this results in full blown painic attacks.
he is however bright and does not appear to have any learning difficulties.

he is currently at a private school in the nursery dept. i have a daughter that is 15 months younger in the same nursery class
i do not know if he was at a state school whether people would be worried about him enough to put him on the special needs register

i have just received my lea allocation for him at a school that i love that i didnt think i had a chance of getting him into.
it is very small only 81 children

i don't know whether to leave him where he is or move him.
i don't know what the situation is regarding EP's at private schools or how the whole SN thing works in this situation.
would it be better to have him at the local school? are things easier to get organised in the state system?
i very confused, and have just found out that the lady who would be teaching him if he stayed where he was is pregnant.

has anyone done the sn thing through a private school?
what are my chances of getting him a statement?

any advice welcome

[AttilaTheMeerkat]

Has he ever been assessed by a developmental paediatrician?.

Would also suggest you look at the National Autistic Society's website as they may be able to assist too. Do you think he could be on the autistic spectrum?.

At the very least you will need to speak with either IPSEA (their web address is www.ipsea.org.uk) or SOS;SEN and seek their advice asap.

State system and private are two very different beings when it comes to special educational needs. Some privately run educational estabishments are not very understanding of special needs children regardless of their difficulties.

I think it would be easier for you to obtain a statement if he was in the state sector rather than the private sector.

[Bink]

Statement - attila's your lady for that. Though I would think that if you have a specific medical diagnosis (fragile x?) getting a statement would be significantly easier than it is for children with problems that can only get a clinical diagnosis (ie, where it can be claimed it's only a "matter of opinion", like Aspergers etc.).

School choice - how well do you know the state school you have the allocation for? (Presumably well, since you say you love it.) How well do they know your son? Do they know all about his genetic disorder and its presentation? Whether or not they've already got the full info, I would make an appt to speak to the SENCO there and be completely full and frank about what they can offer. I think how they respond to that discussion will help you decide.

On the other side, how good is the private school? Are they keen, but inexperienced & amateur? Or are they making hmm noises (like asking you to explain how to manage him)? Or are they doing things properly, & taking advice from qualified professionals?

As attila says, it so isn't a case of private schools on one side of the fence, state on the other - some state are fantastic with SN, some are too over-stretched to manage; some private couldn't care less, some are wonderful.

[oililymad]

no assesment by a dev. paed.
i am sure he has an autistic disorder

i had never heard of ipsea so i will lokk athat up. sorry i am new to all of this!

my oldest son has aspergers ( its part of the genetic disorder that my children have ) but he was mild so no statement and we just muddled thru until we found an excellent borading school and he is so so happy there. ( KEEPS US POOR THOUGH!)

i dont know much about the whole staementing thing but i am beginning to think it would be easier to go to the state system.

[oililymad]

the dx is fg syndrome.
its a little known genetic disorder that several drs claim is responsible fopr a large proportion of children with asd's and collection of other physical/personality traits.

[daisymo]

Statements can take a while to get to, but schools get more funding when a child statemented so it would be as much in the schools interest as yours/your sons for that to happen. Def speak to the senco asap. have you collected evidence of your son's needs? you/the school will have to, so start or ask nursery.

[HairyMaclary]

Hi, My son has CP but no particular learning difficulties but his physical difficulties mean he needs more support to learn iyswim. I have been looking into this whole area a lot as he's due to start Sept 09. Basically you are better off in the state system. It's not what I want for my son but in order to get the level of help needed e.g. EP's, OT's Physio's the private schools have to 'buy it in' from the LEA, so either they don't or they charge you. If you have a statement then they LEA will provide what is on the statement but they will be much less generous (if they are ever generous!) in what they will provide, i.e. less hours of a Learning support Assistant.
I have to say that I think state schools are more clued up about SN generally, or if they themselves are not then they at least know where to go for help. We have been in very detailed discussions with 2 private schools now and it's become obvious that they really have no idea. It's very frustrating as his needs are comparatively mild, but he does need more than dyslexia support which is really what most private schools consider SN.
Good Luck!

[oililymad]

there is actaully a child with "moderate" cp at my sons school.
they are good with him but i dont want to start paying for EP's that sounds awaful. and then the lea dont have to accept what they say?

i hate decisions.
if i dont taae this place now i might be kicking myself in a year.

a few weeks ago i was considering taking him out of school altogether.

[daisymo]

I'm perhaps biased as I work in a state school, but we certainly do what we can for kids, statements or not, and have a great team of teaching assistants that provide one to one support too. One of our battles is sometimes to get parents interested or supportive so I'm sure you'll be fine in the state sector.