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Ds1 being referred to the paediatrician. I suspect aspergers. Talk to me about Aspergers ...

7 replies

colditz · 20/02/2008 17:02

.. Because half of me is screaming "He's perfectly normal, stop trying to push your appalling parenting onto your innocent child", and the other half is screaming "You should have pushed for this a year ago!"

The referral has come about as a result of a strongly worded (but absolutely NOT rude) letter to the school nurse, explaining that I want him excused from weight checks and why - he has a weird interest in scales and weights and cause and effects and why etcetcetc and I could see him deciding to to eat anything to see what would happen!

The Aspergers thought is me, btw, nothing anyone else has suggested.

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Hassled · 20/02/2008 17:19

DON'T PANIC!!
He either has Asperger's or he doesn't - a)nothing you did or didn't do as a parent would affect that and b) nothing you do now will affect the diagnosis, which might well be that he's absolutely "normal" but with a weird interest in scales. Surely it's better to know than not? And if it is Asperger's, there are so many degrees of it.

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Hassled · 20/02/2008 17:24

Sorry - that sounds very unsympathetic (was distracted by boy with catapult) and I really am sympathetic - I have 2 SN DCs, one Dyspraxic "with Aspergic tendencies". It was a hard thing to come to terms with, but if having his diagnosis means he is as sweet and lovely as he is then I would rather the Asperger's than normality, IFSWIM - and I'm sure that would be the case with you and your DS.

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catok · 20/02/2008 18:23

DS has been dxd Asperger's for the last three years - he's still my lovely bright boy. Took ages for me to accept that I'm not the direct cause of his difficulties. You are asked so many questions before they can reach a dx that you realise that it is just the way your child is. At least with the dx you can read about ways to help rather than guessing - even then there is so much to read you can get confused!!
Better to know one way or the other than blame your parenting - which can't be 'appalling' as you care enough to get his needs met!

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colditz · 20/02/2008 18:23

Thanks Hassled. I need to calm down about it, I know I do.

But in a way I am really glad it was the School Nurse who raised the issue and not me. It means it's not all in my imagination.

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Unfitmother · 20/02/2008 18:34

DS is waiting to be assesed re Aspergers but we're not altogether if we want a diagnosis. I now think it will be a good idea, DH coming round slowly.
Who have you been refered to?

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colditz · 20/02/2008 18:36

I don't even know. We are Rural, though, not London. we are in Leicestershire.

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Unfitmother · 20/02/2008 18:47

We had to see a paediatrician first then be refered to a child pyschiatrist (18mth wait) , hope you get on better

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