What can we do during this sleep regression?

[Blankiefan]

DD is almost 10 mo and we're having a very un-fun regression. Usually a great sleeper, she's showing loads of signs of the 10 month sleep regression.

• fighting sleep at bedtime when she previously self settled. If we put her down drowsy but awake, she screams. (we have a great bedtime routine that we've used religiously since 3 mo).
  
• waking at night and taking 3 hours to re-settle.
  
• her appetite is definitely lower
  
• she's fussy during the day (probably as bloody knackered as we are)
  
• she's fighting her naps (which were never great, to be fair)
  

We've read the online advice - remember its a phase (this is our mantra), don't create new bad habits, don't let her scream it out... But what do we actually do at 3am when she's screaming? Currently, we rock her until she's deep asleep (20 mins) then put her down - and she screams - so we rock her for longer (40 mins) and she goes down nicely... For ten minutes until she starts screaming again, repeat for three hours and give up and bring her into bed with us where she'll cat nap for an hour before its time to get up!

We both work ft and we don't want to either rock her to sleep or co-sleep so what do we actually do at 3am!

Any advice very gratefully received....

[PotteringAlong]

Is there a reason why you don't want to co-sleep if, at the moment, it's the only thing that's working to get you all more sleep? If you're bringing her into bed with you after she's screamed for 3 hours then you are co-sleeping, even if just for a bit. Just make it earlier and you might all sleep better.

My DS was the same, it is just a phase and she won't be in your bed forever!

[Blankiefan]

I don't particularly like co-sleeping, nor does DH. It's very much a last resort thing. We both sleep lightly when DD is in bed with us. I'd rather find a way got her to sleep soundly in her own bed. I'll co-sleep if we have to for a couple of weeks but don't want to encourage it / have to break a new habit...

[PotteringAlong]

For me, it came down to which habit I'd rather deal with - awake and crying for hours or asleep in bed with us. Even if you only sleep lightly I was of the "whatever gets you through the night" school of thought! DS will now happily do 12 hours in his own cot and he just stopped waking in the night (eventually!).

The other alternative is that you take alternate nights, ear plugs and spare bedroom (if you have one) and tough it out I think.

[Blankiefan]

How long did you co sleep for and how did you move him back to his own bed?

Thanks

[MsBug]

We cosleptfrom from the four month sleep regression until dd was about one. We used to take her into our bed when she woke during the night, and so we stopped co sleeping when she stopped waking in the night. It wasn't really a choice, it was the only option to save our sanity. Light sleep is better than no sleep!

[PotteringAlong]

We did exactly the same as mrsbug! When he stopped waking in the night we stopped bringing him in. It was much later than 1 for us (he was never a great sleeper!) but one day he just started sleeping through and it was fine.