19 month old refusing naps and up early. Help!

[Neiffer]

Our 19 month old has recently started getting up for the day at 4am :( he's always been an early riser, generally up at 5-5/30, but this is just crackers. He's also gone from a 1.5 hr nap in the pm to refusing it completely. He's absolutely exhausted, as are we. I'm thinking the two are probably related (no naps/early get up) but have no idea what to do. We can't just leave him to shout in the mornings as live in a thin walled terrace house.
He'll occasionally nap in the buggy but not guaranteed and the same with the car. Until a few days ago he was a great napper who happily went to bed :((((
What can we do?!

[Suchanamateur]

Sounds grim - sorry. 18 month sleep regression hitting a bit late? We've been having all over the shop mornings, naps and bedtimes since about 16.5/17 months. Definitely sounds like something developmental if its suddenly happened. Sorry not to be more help.

[Neiffer]

I hoped it wasn't developmental but you're probably right. 4am this morning and up all night with a newborn. Sob.

[Suchanamateur]

Oh god. Hoping that you get a nap today - thats awful without having a toddler and a newborn (which I found awful anyway...). The only positive to it possibly being developmental is that when this developmental phase is over, it might all right itself. Or thats what I tell myself as I rock in a corner...

[omama]

Ouch - sounds rough, esp with a newborn in tow. Agree it sounds like could be a developmental thing - we also had a blip around 18-22 months where ds would wake early & go to bed late & then suddenly he snapped out of it & got sleepy again!

What time did he used to nap in the pm (before he started refusing)? And what time are you putting him to bed at night?

It may be his naptime needs shifting slightly later & maybe then he'll take it. We found we had to shift ds' nap to around 1pm at that age.

While he's having no nap I would try a super early bedtime of 5.30-6pm - you might find he sleeps better & for longer with going that bit earlier. Helps to keep ontop of the overtiredness a bit.

[Suchanamateur]

Interesting Omama - my 18 month old, while tired, just doesn't seem sleepy. With her early wakes, we can't get much past a 12pm nap (and thats a lot later than it has been) and bedtime is a crap shoot. Keeping fingers crossed for 22 months...

[Suchanamateur]

Ps.- and sorry to hijack your thread Neiffer - but Omama - did you stick to your 1pm nap time whatever time DS woke up? And what time was bedtime....?

[omama]

such- if your dd is waking early i probably wouldnt push straight to a 1pm nap esp if getting to 12 is a struggle. In that situation I'd push the nap 15mins later per week so after 4 weeks the nap will start at 1pm. Although slower, its more achievable as they are less likely to get overtired. Pushing the nap slowly later should see you an improvement in wakeup time.

When we got ds' napping at 1pm we started off with bedtime at 7.30 but found after a month or 2 he needed an 8pm bedtime. That was with a 2-2.5hr nap starting at 1pm. I have friends who stuck with a 7pm bedtime & spent an hour every night putting their dc back in bed. I couldnt be bothered with that so we stuck with a later bedtime & never got any messing & he slept through til 7am. It stayed that way right until he started dropping his nap & now we're back to a 7pm bedtime again.

[Suchanamateur]

Thanks Omama. We definitely couldn't jump to 1! Will have a go at pushing it v slowly. The thing we struggle with is getting the timing right between end if nap an bedtime. She often takes ages to settle and I can't work out if its OT or UT... These babies are like algebra sometimes - and I was never very good at maths!

Neiffer- hope you are managing some naps!