my baby just cannot do daytime sleep and it's killing me...

[snowqueenrollo]

he's 12 weeks, EBF and we're at a point where most nights now we're sleeping well as we've mastered feeding lying down.

Daytimes are a nightmare....he will not nap at all unless he's being held, and at that he won't settle in any hold other than on his tummy over my shoulder. If i have to put him down (to go to the loo) he wakes up like a klaxon and takes ages to settle back down again.
He generally naps for 20 mins - if i'm lucky i'll get 45 mins.......two miraculous days he had a full hour sretch before lunch, woke for a feed and a little awake time and then slept another hour - all in his moses basket. He was such a happy chap for the rest of the day. For some reason though he just never seems to fall into a properly deep sleep during the day. I dread early evening as I know overtiredness will land me with a screaming inconsolable child by 8pm, and there goes my evening.....

He's obviously tired, he is so blasted grumpy as a result. He won't settle in the sling unless we're out of the house walking so I'm going mad here at home just holding a baby ALL day - i get nothing done. DH does most of the housework but the point is I would like an hour to bake a cake or get dinner prepped and most importantly spend some time with my 7 year old who is really starting to lose patience with the whole 'babies needs' thing.

i am fine with a baby who is happy to be awake all day.....but he's not happy and i'm all out of ideas on how to get him to settle....

[lazzaroo]

If it's any consolation mine is the same. 13 weeks, ebf, DD2. We have progressed in that she'll sleep in pram (indoors) or car seat or a baby swing, but she doesn't settle easily and then only sleeps between 20-40mins. It means I'm trying o get her to sleep a lot to try and avoid over tiredness! I have a 3 year old too so it's not easy. I have found White noise helps & the swing is good as it moves without me!

Our nights are rubbish too though so at least you have that sussed!

[lazzaroo]

I try to stick with maximum awake time of 1.5 hours, if that helps. This website is quite helpful....

www.sleepytot.com/blog/baby-and-toddler-sleep-routines-made-easy

[Thurlow]

I remember those days vividly, DD wouldn't sleep in the day either for bloody months.

Will he sleep in the pushchair at all?

A bit of a routine might help - certainly wouldn't hurt to try. Baby Whisperer and Jo Frost are both very vaguely routines that try to help just help everyone get in to the swing of awake time, feed time and sleep time, not time or place specific at all.

What I found helped most, though, was just accepting that that was how DD wanted to sleep, so I stopped trying to put her down. If she was going to sleep on me I'd put a film on or curl up in bed with a book, and if she was going to sleep in the pushchair I'd get my headphones in and listen to the radio for a long walk. I know this can't be ideal with a 7 year old, but maybe once he gets used to the idea of napping regularly, he will start to be able to sleep alone? This seemed to happen with us, and though she took a long time to grow out of the catnaps, I could at least put her down for them.

They do grow out of it eventually, they really do.