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Do some babies just need to cry before they go to sleep?

7 replies

lazzaroo · 11/04/2013 12:13

DD1 used to cry often before naps, but then she has reflux and so spent a lot of time crying in the early months! DD2 is 3.5months and tends to cry before going to sleep. Not always but the majority of the time. I don't like it, and my immediate thought is always....is she hungry. I ebf so never know how much she's had.

Deep down I know that's not normally the case as she's only usually awake 1.5 hours between naps, so has usually had a feed within the hour. When I'm on my own with her it doesn't bother me o much but it's the comments and looks from other people that make me doubt myself....'maybe she's not tired', 'she's fighting it', 'she must be hungry' etc etc.

She has also started sucking her fist/thumb before sleep....please reassure this isn't necessarily a hunger cue?! Pretty sure it's a comfort thing (tried a dummy, she won't take one)

She s napping now. When I first put her in pram she cried, pro ably no more than a couple f minutes, then went quiet, sucked on her hand and was asleep about 10 mins later.

Always wonder, am I putting her down too soon, too late etc etc or is it just something she needs to do?

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noisytoys · 11/04/2013 12:18

It's normal. We always called it the bedtime song. DC's would have a good sing (cry) then sleep

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TripTheLightFanjotastic · 11/04/2013 12:29

My DS would cry before going to sleep and waking up from every sleep. He's only just grown out of it and he's 2 next month. In fact he sometimes gives a whimper or a single cry out still, but not full on crying like he used too. I think some children are just like that!

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CreatureRetorts · 11/04/2013 12:31

Maybe she sucks her hand for comfort much in the way babies like to feed to sleep for comfort?

Do you think she's ok? If she sleeps quickly then maybe she's fine? I let my dd cry for 1-2 mins and if she falls asleep then I assume she's fine. She's much older - 16 months. I didn't start doing that until she was 6 months plus though as she'd get very upset otherwise.

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lazzaroo · 11/04/2013 12:39

Thanks for replies. If she cries for too long I usually end up offering a feed. Sometimes she just gets angrier! Confirming over tiredness! Sometimes she takes a bit and then falls asleep. I tend not to feed to sleep as she usually then quickly wakes with wind or wakes up in discomfort. She doesn't often cry when she wakes. She has just woken (only sleeps 30-45mins...but that's another thread!) and is all smiles.

She only goes for naps in pram, swing or carseat. The motion helps & I feel like I'm doing something instead of her just crying in her cot. We rock her to sleep at night. I know, I know....we'll regret it! But DD1 was the same & we just sorted that when she was older.

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lazzaroo · 11/04/2013 15:17

Conducted a little experiment this afternoon. Went out for walk, ignoring when I thought she might be due for a sleep. She actually nodded off about 20mins later than I thought. But then woke after only 20 mins. Didn't cry but didn't go back to sleep either despite the 20 min walk home.

I can't work it out!

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DangerMousey · 11/04/2013 17:04

You have my sympathy lazzaroo, DS1 has just turned 4 months and his naps are a mystery to me too!

He also cries when he is tired - but he is FF so I know he is not hungry, cos I know he has had an 8oz bottle an hour ago, for example!

Normally i put him down in his cot, he cries for a couple of minutes (more like grizzling, shouting, not really distressed crying), and then I replace his dummy and he goes back to sleep. This week's 'new challenge' is he is really fighting his nap in the late afternoon (usually at around 4pm). Took me half an hour of continual tummy rubbing, shhhhhiing, putting dummy in etc etc to get him off this evening. But he only naps for 45 mins at a time too, so he desperately needs this last sleep to get him through to bedtime!

So to answer your iriginal question, I would say yes: me DS cries before he goes to sleep too just i normally pop his dummy in to stop him!

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Scrumptiousboy · 12/04/2013 08:29

My DS is same age and cries to sleep if not in pram or sling. His cry sometimes escalates to a scream for couple of minutes before he nods of before naps and he always has a full on screaming fit before evening bedtime. As a result we rock him to sleep as it gets him to nod off more quickly. We'll move onto plan B when we're all good and ready.
I think it's him just being so alert and energetic when awake that he just doesn't know how to wind down otherwise. I've tried bath - goes mad in it, massage - thinks its the best game ever, quiet room -makes no difference, feed - not interested, bringing nap time/bedtime earlier - just cries longer! So, I've accepted it's just what he does and will grow out of it. He's always happy when he wakes up and super alert so can't complain :-)

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